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Rachel Dyer Dec 2016
It wasn’t fast or loud
It didn’t happen with a bang, or a crack, or a crowd.

It was more like sleeping.
A slow slip a lovely creeping.

It wasn’t a fall or a trip
It was an aching rip

I just looked at you
And I knew

But I wasn't surprised
It had been there all along I realized

But it had just opened its eyes
Beautiful brown ones full of love and void of lies.

That is how my love for you came,
Slowly and without shame.
cartel Dec 2016
I found love on the first day of second grade
It was blonde and knew the 5 times table by heart
I found it the first time I walked down the street alleys of Venice
The first time I tried a cinnamon twist swirl latte
It was sweet and tasted a little like nostalgia
I found love in every lyric of every oasis song
I found love in every letter of every page of my favorite book
I found it in the boy who didn’t pick up my calls
And then I found it in you

I found heartbreak on the second day of second grade
It was blonde and didn’t know my name
I found it the day they discontinued kinder eggs
I found it the day he stopped giving me a reason for not picking up my calls
It was hard and felt like a splinter that wouldn’t go away
I found it when I first saw my dad cry
I found it when I saw you cry

But it’s okay, because I found love on the 24th day of 12th grade
This time it was 17 and wore orange sweaters to school
It was kind and listened to everything I had to say
It was loyal and wrote me letters
It was smart and recited me poems
It smelt like a mixture of cologne and my childhood room
It would tell me I'm beautiful
Even if I was crying
It would tell me I'm beautiful
Even after I showered
It would tell me I'm beautiful
Even if I didn’t feel it
I found love every time I enter the common room and catch your smile
I find it every single day

I found love the first day I said I loved you
I found heartbreak the same day
The day I realized this wouldn’t last forever
It was painful but simultaneously okay
Because I find love every time you hug me and leave your scent lingering on my cheek for the next hour
Every time we make weird eye contact right before we take off all our clothes
Every time you kiss my forehead
Every time I think about all we’ve done
Every time I think about how much more we have to come
Every time you talk to my mom
Every time you try to talk to my dad
Every time I hear you say my name
Every time I remember you love me too
Every time I hear the phone ring

I found it every day for a year
It was nice and felt like the feeling right after you jump in the pool, right before you hit the water
Those few seconds in the air
But slower
For hours
For days
Hopefully forever
Caitlyn Emilie Dec 2016
Please come here, come back to me, and lay with me beneath these sheets.

Soothe me from these scary thoughts and bring peace to my sanity.

You feel even further away from me and I need you to help me breathe.

You are my home and I'm homesick because you're a thousand miles away.

Praying that Santa has you sat in the back of his sleigh to bring me joy on Christmas Day.

All I want this year is you.

For you are the only thing I have in my life that is true.
in bed anxiously awaiting Santa! So excited for Christmas, but however I really miss my love. Holidays without him really ****.
Payton Elizabeth Dec 2016
“I love your worst days because thats when you breakdown and I get to rebuild you.”
My sculptor
“Wakey wakey eggs and bakey.”
My alarm clock
“ You won’t breakdown, I know how to keep your composure”
My rock
“ I just basically learned from loosing you that you can’t take anything for granted…”
My student
“I love you means that I accept you for the person that you are and that I do not wish to change you into someone else…”
My acceptor
“I don’t know I want to give you everything.”
My caregiver
“I think marrying you is the only thing I’m really actually sure about.” My future
“I just want you to know that I’m sorry.”
My apologizer
“I always feel like I’m missing something when I’m not with you.”
My other half
“You did really good tonight. Whenever you did something good i was like that’s my girl!! Even when you fell off the beam I still said that’s my girl.”
My cheerleader
“Me you dinner and a movie Friday night. Dinner at 8, late movie. I’ll pick you up around 7:47, be ready.”
My event planner
"You’re my moment.”
*My purpose
Sarah M Gillihan Dec 2016
He is my light,
my life, my soul.
He is my family
My partner
Unaccepted by my family
A long life choice
to sit by my side
Forever.

Strong as the wind
in the city of Chicago
His love falls unto me
like a tree falls in a forest
Without the timber scream
Silence
Secrecy
No one will know
No one will see

Sadness
Rushing through my mind
Once through him
His soul
Numb.
Disassociated
from life itself
Lost.
Where the darkness takes over

Darkness
The ventriloquist of his heart
Where the lack of
Dopamine
takes over the ability to
Sleep
Think
Feel
Anything real

What does the future bring?
Sitting at a desk
But now,
working.
Stress.
Dying stress
Living in the world of
Valoran
Waging the war of
Demacia and Noxus
When the real war is
against himself

Sister, brother, father, mother
He sits in their minds
but not in their world
Detached.
Afraid.
Games
work
bed.
Games
work
bed.
Games
wor­k
bed.

The cycle continues.

Sitting in a photo booth
He stares at his whole world
His light,
His life, his soul.
I am his family
His partner
Loved by his family
A long life choice
To sit by his side
**Forever.
Christina L Dec 2016
Your tears on my neck
my sobs on yours
your sniffle and gasp for air
my shaky hands and gripping arms
your hand holding onto mine
not letting me go
and then pulling me for another hug
another kiss
Just one more
and then another
if we keep this up
I won't have to say goodbye.
nina Dec 2016
you have been lying to me.
you have let me curled up beside you & stare at you with starry eyes,
letting me believe that it was just my mind creating this doubt about your honesty but my soul was screaming at me to pay attention because somehow deep down i know that you have been lying to me.
i told myself that i trusted you & that i wouldn't look at your phone even though you spend more time starting at the glow of your phone than you do speaking to me.
i told myself i wouldn't look at your phone so i tried to forget the four digits that make up your password but i memorized them & i tried to confuse myself by saying as many numbers in my mind as possible but i memorized them.
i memoriezed them because i'm nosy & untrusting of men but also because you have proven more than once before that you are untrustworthy.
yet still i ignored the growling & snarling underneath my heart telling me you were hiding something from me, yet i still ignored the tightness in my chest & the migraines building in my brain from stress of lying to myself about your deceptions.
but of course, the growling became roaring & i couldn't contain the anxiety, the fear & curiousity of what the f#k are you doing behind my back?
so as you were in the kitchen i pressed in those four digits to reveal the lies you kept from me & immediately the pain of a thousand sharpened needles pierced my chest yet a part of me was not surprised, after all this wasn't the first time...
& i told you to get out & for a moment i was strong enough to let go but the more i explained my pain, the less i could resist & i fell again under your seduction & empty promises of changing...
& as i got ready for work this morning, suppressing the open wounds in my heart & the hollowness in my breath, i saw you sleeping in the bed.
for a moment i smiled but then remembered all you've done to tear apart my heart & soul & soon enough i felt my fingers curl around your phone again to be sure that you meant it this time.
but all i saw was that you decided to change only the platform on which you hide your lies from me...

but i am insane
& i stay

i can feel myself transforming into the empty shell of a human, a ghost haunting myself, a memory of a being that was once so loving, kind, strong & intelligent.
but i now am just a silhouette that you can project whatever you'd like onto it.
you have created an empty body, a doll, a toy, a puppet that you can make dance for you at any moment in time.
is that what you wanted? because if so then..
*you win
Caitlyn Emilie Dec 2016
I stopped feeling at home a long time ago when I realized that home wasn't a place. It was a pair of two arms and a beating heart.
Kelsey Lauren Dec 2016
Society's time clock is looking down on me.
It does so very disapprovingly.
Because for some odd reason.
Society thinks that it is treason.
That I am not in a relationship.
It goes against Society's script.
It says that I will never be happy.
Until I find some devotee.
I've never really had a real boyfriend.
Why would I want someone in which to depend?
Everyone will always let you down.
In the end they will happily watch you drown.
Why can't Society go someplace else for a couple days?
Update: I've got to update my life.

Topic: Toxic people I used to hold dear are no longer in sight .

Reason: Him. me and my strength.

I turned a year older and I am still not sure were i'm going. I'm really trying to just... be. I'm simply a human being.

I will never understand how sunflowers will grow though the toughest places, or how I became so lucky as to see him grow, in a town like mine.

I will never understand a lot, But if I did what would be the point.

Maybe i'll find it one day but for now , early sunsets and the sweaty palms I get with him is just enough.
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