I'm sorry for all that I've done
All the pain I've put you through
You endure enough already
And I'm making it worse for you

I'm sorry if I've ever hurt you
You know I mean the best
I'd never do anything intentionally
If I knew it would cause you distress.

I'm sorry if I've ever made you cry
I couldn't live with myself if I knew
That I had caused enough pain
To make tears stream out of you.

I'm sorry if I've ever made you sad
And if I have please tell me why
I don't want to be that guy
I want to make you laugh, not cry.

I'm sorry if I've ever ignored you
You deserve my full attention
A girl like you is special
And my mind needs to focus in your direction.

I'm sorry if I've ever annoyed you
I try my best to please
Sometimes I don't think about the things I say or do
And I am irritating without cease.

I'm sorry if I've ever pressured you
To do the things you shouldn't do
You have the right to make your own decisions
And I should respect them instead of forcing you.

I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused
And all the distress I've put you through
No matter what I do
Just know that I never mean to hurt you.

5 o'clock, I should start my homework
Haha that's a funny one
I'll just go on Facebook instead

6 o'clock, Time to eat dinner
This shouldn't take too long
I can start my work after

7 o'clock, Okay I'm done eating
I should really get my homework started
Goes on Twitter for an hour

8 o'clock, Oh **** it's 8:00 already?
I'm serious I'll start my homework now
Oh look someone texted me

9 o'clock, How the **** did an hour go by already?
That was like ten minutes max
Oh well, I wonder what's new on YouTube?

11 o'clock, Did I really just spend two hours watching videos on YouTube?
Wow I have a problem
I wonder what's happened on Facebook since I left?

12 o'clock, Oh **** it's a new day
I have school in eight hours and my homework isn't started
Well I'm not going to get any sleep so I might as well just stay up later

1 o'clock, Wow I'm so tired
Homework is stupid
Why do teachers give homework?
Whoever invented homework is dead to me

2 o'clock, Haha I'm still going
Tomorrow is about to be rough
But now that "tomorrow" is today
I have to last a full day on no sleep
Wait I still have to start my ******* homework

3 o'clock, Finally started my homework
Too tired to process anything
This homework is gonna take forever cause I'm exhausted out of my ******* mind

4 o'clock, School starts in four hours
What the **** am I doing?
Why did I have to procrastinate?
Why do I do this to myself?
I have a major problem

5 o'clock, Finished my homework
Have to wake up in an hour
Oh well, an hour is better than none
I'm never procrastinating again!
*Cycle repeats tomorrow

I'm lying here awake
Just thinking about you
Where we started
And who we've become.

I'm lying here awake
And now I'm wondering
Are you lying there awake
Thinking about me too?

I'm lying here awake
Listing all of your perfections
If I try to list them all
I'll be up until the dawn.

I'm lying here awake
As the minutes tick by
I'm going to get little sleep
But it's worth it because
I love to think about you.

I'm lying here awake
Drifting off into sleep
I'll see you in my dreams
And I'll carry you off to live happily ever after
Because you're a princess
And you deserve a prince
I'll rescue you from any trouble, any distress
And I'll never leave you as long as you're alive.

I'm lying here awake
Just thinking about my princess
And how my life would be different
If I had never met you.

I'm lying here awake
And now I am thankful
That I met you
In our own little fairytale.

If things were different,
And we were the same people with different characters,
Maybe we'd be together
Maybe we'd love one another.

If things were different,
Maybe we'd be happy together
And we'd stay with each other
For the rest of forever.

If things were different,
We could cuddle,
We could kiss,
We could love,
And we wouldn't have to hide it.

If things were different,
Maybe we'd grow to become married
Husband and wife
And we'd make a family.

If things were different,
Maybe we'd grow old together
Travel together
Explore together
Experience together
Side by side through it all.

But in the end,
None of this really matters
Because you are who you are
And I love everything about you.

What have I done?
I took it too far
I'm just an idiot
Yeah just a ******* idiot

How can I live with myself?
It might not seem like a lot
But even the slightest pain I cause you
Is causing me to hate myself

I can't eat
I can't sleep
I can't think straight
Knowing that I've hurt you

I just want your warmth
Your love
Your everything
But I don't deserve one bit of it
Because of what I've done to you

I hope you're able to forgive me
I need you in my life
I promise I'll be a better person
If you accept my apologies

Yeah I'm just an idiot
A ******* idiot
Please forgive me
For what I've done to you

The color red, it's your favorite
The color white, your car, your house
Shakespeare, we were King and Queen
Choir, you sing like an angel
Gymnastics, you competed
Joseph, you directed
Laser tag, you destroyed
HIMYM, we watched as we cuddled
Your scent, it still lingers on me
Wine, I'd love to drink with you
New Years Eve, we talked all day and night
Mitchell's, we stayed for hours and conversed
France, we traveled together
Poetry, you got me writing again
My car, where we kissed at midnight
My basement, where we made love
It all reminds me of you

Sometimes I wish I had amnesia so I could forget...move on
But I love you so much
No case of amnesia could take you out of my mind

Although sometimes it hurts
I want you to know
That I love each and every one of those little things that reminds me of you

I've fallen in love with a girl
That cannot love me back
She's everything I want
Yet a love for me she lacks

She's perfect in every way
There isn't a flaw about her
I just wish that things were different
That way I could have her

I don't want to seem selfish
Her life and feelings matter too
But I pray and I wish day after day
That she'll come to love me soon

I've fallen for a girl
Fallen oh so very deep
She tells me it will never work out
And for this reason I weep

I feel the tears come to my eyes
As I face this truth in my mind
My tears begin to dampen the page
Where I am writing these rhymes

I will never have her to myself
At some point I'll have to give her up
This isn't a truth I want to confess
That she won't be mine when we're grown up

I talk to her day after day
And each day I get pulled in more
I want to take her far away with me
For she is the only one I adore

I've fallen in love with a girl
That never leaves my mind
I think about her throughout the day
And dream about her at night

I want to give her the world
That is what she deserves
For she is a queen, a girl of royalty
For her only the best should be reserved

I could talk about her for hours
And not for a second get bored
When I think about her I can't help but be happy
Her effect on me is something I adore

I enjoy every moment
I get to spend in her presence
For she's an angel, a girl of beauty
She came down to Earth from the heavens

No matter what happens to the both of us
In our future lives
I will never forget her or stop thinking about her
My love for her will never die

I've fallen for this girl
And I want her to be mine
But I know that I can't have her
So I'll love her to the end of time

How lucky am I you ask?
I'm the luckiest guy on Earth
To have the privilege...the blessing
to know a girl like you.

Why is it a privilege you ask?
You are the most amazing ******* Earth
And I adore everything about you.

What do I adore you ask?
Your smile, laugh, eyes, beauty,
Your smarts, talent, humor, kindness,
The list goes on and on.

Why am I so kind to you you ask?
In my eyes you're not just a girl,
You're a queen, angel, goddess,
And it would be wrong for anyone to mistreat someone so extraordinary.

Do I love you you ask?
The answer to that is simple:
I love you to the moon and back,
I love you more than life itself,
And you are the light of my life,
Joy of my world.

So how lucky am I you ask?
Luckier than winning the lottery,
Luckier than landing a dream job,
Luckier than being saved from death,
Luckier than a four-leaf clover,
All because I know you.

Words can't describe what I'm feeling now
I feel like I deserve pain
I want to slam my head into a wall
Hold my breath till I give in
Drown myself in the hotel pool

It's New Years Eve so why do I feel like breaking down and crying?

My family's all here so I shouldn't feel lonely
A new year is starting so I shouldn't feel like ****
I feel like I don't matter
       I'm a nobody
What would happen if I took my life tonight?
Would 2016 miss me at all?

I wonder and I wonder
About you
         About life
                  About death
About how much you mean to me
About what I mean to you
Do I really mean a whole lot?
**** **** ****
I need something to clear my head

I want things to change
Not between us
But I just want my feelings to change
I don't want to feel lonely
I don't want to feel depressed
I want to feel like I matter again
Not trapped inside a school of fish
I feel like a tear drop in a vast ocean
So if I go, what difference will it make?

Why the hell am I thinking this way?
My life isn't ending
And I'm not going to end it
I'm shaking from my thoughts right now
My mind is scaring me
Why do you have to be so ******* perfect?
I love you but I know it's not enough
Nothing will make you mine
She's yours and you're hers
And I can't say a word about it
Why the **** can't I just have you?
I'd be the best friend, husband, father, soulmate that anyone could give
I'd be the best for you
And there wouldn't be a doubt in my mind about that
I'd give you my heart, my soul, my being
I'd give you my all, my everything
If you could just be mine
But I know that that option is out the window
We've scrapped it, shredded it, thrown it in the fire
Made a deal from a TV show that I know will never happen
Just to give me the false security
The false belief that I have a chance
**** my life
        **** my feelings
                **** my mind
                        **** **** ****

My eyes feel dry but I want them to be leaking
I want my tears to stain the walls
        And the bed
                And the carpet
                        And everything around me
I want to drown in my tears
Flood the world with my emotions
No ark will be able to withstand this hurricane

This is the worst New Years I've ever experienced
But I have a resolution:
Be a better friend
Become closer to you
Stop the suffering
Stop suffering
Stop

Breath in...Breath out
Everything will be okay
Jack Kerouac has told me so
These feelings will come and go
And my happiness will grow and grow
And my demeanor will surely show
That I'm a warrior
I've made it through the dark
This black moment in my life
This hell
Soon there will be no more suffering
But for now
I
       Will
                   Suffer

I can't imagine a life where I don't end up with you
But to be honest...it's inevitable
And that scares me
You can't picture a life where I'm all you need
And that brings tears to my eyes
You apologize as the salt from my tears approaches my lips, leaving stains on my cheek
We've dug ourselves a deep hole that won't be easy to climb out of
My hands are shaking as I'm typing these words
The taste of salt on my tongue
Why did fate do this to us?
Everything happens for a reason, but what's the justification for all of this pain, suffering, love that won't evolve into anything?
Maybe we'll find out tomorrow, maybe we'll find out in a decade, maybe we'll never find out at all
But I can assure you one thing
If I had to redo this part of my life,
100 times out of 100, I would dig that hole again and again with you

I talk to you and you give me a buzz
You make me go absolutely crazy
You don't have to do anything but be there
And I'm gone...
        Absolutely insane

You're like my drug and I'm going through a relapse
Every moment that I'm without you
I want you
        Crave you
                Desire you
                        Need you
                               I'll die for you if I have to

You have me hooked
        Addicted
And I have no way to escape
        No way to come clean

You have my mind spinning
       I don't know where I'm going
                Or what I'm doing
                        I just know that I want you

Always
          24/7
                I have you on my mind

Your effect on me is immense
And that's why I love it
But I won't be satisfied
Until you give me another dose
Talk to me...do something
And I'll enter another high

You are my Golden Star
...no not just on snapchat

You are the light that leads me,
The sight that gleams for me.

You are the beauty of the world,
And I could stare at you forever.

You are sheer perfection,
And you deserve to have Earth in the palm of your hands.

You are independent,
And your knowledge will guide you.

You are humorous,
And I love when you make me laugh.

You are you,
And you'll be my Golden Star forever.

I don't know where to start
There is so much I can say
About this girl that stops my heart.

In my eyes you're perfection
In my mind you're just amazing
Everything you are...words can't give you justice.

Funny,
Sweet,
Charismatic,
Breathtakingly beautiful,
Honest,
Intelligent,
Talented,
Strong and confident
All of these things make up who you are:
a goddess
a queen

Life with you is electrifying,
Life without you is a bore,
When I'm with you I can't help but smile,
When you're gone I want you here more and more.

I could stare into your eyes forever
They take me to a different place
A heaven, a paradise,
In you I can find peace.

So put on your tiara,
Let's take a night out on the town
You be the queen and I'll be the king
Take me to that paradise
And we'll smile this night away.

I want to run far away with you
I want to go where we can be happy
Somewhere that we'll both enjoy
Together without a care in the world

I want to take good care of you
I want to keep you safe and warm
I won't let anything hurt you
I'll be your safe haven, your home

I want to stay by your side forever
I'll never leave you alone
Through thick and thin and dark of night
My loyalty will be shown

I want to explore the world with you
I want to go traveling and see the sights
See all the beauty the world holds
Although I see most of it in you

I want you in all of my memories
I want you forever on my mind
When I look back to thing I've done
I want to see you there by my side

I want to make you feel special
Like you're a queen because you are
You're my queen and that will never change
You are forever my golden heart

I want to love you more than anything
You'll be all I care about in the world
My love for you will never dwindle
Because you are my life

I want to wake up with you beside me
All the days that I'm alive
Kiss you good morning every morning
Because that's what you'd like

I want to write you poems, sing you songs
More than I already do
We can write together, create together
Something great and new

Our love will make a masterpiece
We are the canvas, our lips the paint
I want to kiss you until together we make
Something more beautiful than Van Gogh could create

I want you as a part of my life
Until my last breath is done
Because I need you forever
Like the Earth needs the Sun

Why does life have to be so cruel?
Putting myself in a place like this was not how I planned my senior year to go
And now I'm crying my eyes out
I'm in a world of pain and sorrow
I've never loved something so much that it hurt but you're my first
I'm leaving a trail of tears everywhere I go
I'm flooding the world with my emotions
No one can sense the pain I hide except for you

What did I do to deserve a girl like you?

I want you to be mine, but you're hers
I want to be yours too, but you're hers
I want to cuddle with you, but you're hers
I want to kiss you all day and all night, but you're hers
I want to be your everything, but you're hers
And I want you to be the same for me, but you're hers
There are so many things I want to do with you but can't
All
Because
*You're hers

Man against man
Until the battle is done
Bullets whizzing by
From the barrels of guns

We fight and we fight
All day and night
Soldiers wounded and dying
It's a tragic sight

Why do we take part
In this thing we call war?
The conflict is unnecessary
There's another way I'm sure

Presidents and dictators
Craving a greater reign
Conquering for sport
Their reasons for war are insane

Religious diversity causes people to battle with much aggressivity
How can two groups that believe killing is wrong join in such an unjust activity?

Racism is another cause of war
Yet we're all humans, just of different color
Is a difference in pigment really a good reason to fight and **** one another?

Why is there so much hatred on the Earth?
We fight and we ****, peace seems to be at a dearth

Killing is such a wrong thing to do
Taking another's life, I can't imagine it
Ending a person's story before it was meant to be through

What causes someone to act in such a way?
Is it something we've done,
Or the things that we say?

One thing is for sure,
These wars need to end.
Our world is troubled and dying,
And it is our job to create peace and make amends.

Time to warm up,
My race is impending.
My last prayer to God,
I am sending.

The runners line up, awaiting our cue,
To start the race and run till we're through.

We begin to run at the crack of the gun,
Running and struggling for a good position.

The gap widens as we each run our race,
Some running faster but I keep my own pace.

I keep pushing myself more the further I go,
The results will show my effort I know.

The last lap is coming,
Time to kick in.
My legs tell me, "slow down,"
But I try not to listen.

I push and sprint to the finish line,
I tell myself, "this race is mine."

I cross the finish,
I'm happy it's done.
And to my surprise,
They tell me I've won!

I walk off the track
Happy as can be.
I quickly pray to God,
"Thank you for helping me."

Now this race is over,
But my next race is impending.
Time to prepare,
My last prayers I am sending.

Why do we do

All the things that we do?

Sleep...
Need it?
Yes
But can I get it?
*No

Kiss me right now before I ******* lose my mind

The trees dance to the singing breeze,
But in the winter the dance will freeze.
The world is frozen for months ahead,
This cold and ice is something to dread.

Soon the spring is welcomed with warmth,
And the trees' buds and flowers burst forth.
Bears and squirrels return from their slumber,
And the colors of the world increase in number.

The summer brings along with it the heat,
And tar melts on the warm concrete.
The world is alive with people and play,
If only this liveliness could be one to stay.

Then autumn comes once and for all,
Colorful leaves to the ground they'll fall.
We return to winter soon again,
Where the world will be white and be frozen.

The seasons cycle for all years to come,
Winter, Spring, Summer, Autumn.