I used to dream about running away with you
Your gone now
I'm still running
Your shadow nipping at my heels
If I could wash my brain
I would choose this pain instead
The sharp reminder has always been more comfort than silence
No one fills the shoes you left
No one fills your mold
No one fits quite like you did
And you blew it all away
Brain washed by bullet
If I could conjure you as a saint in a higher place this could be easy
I can't
Bones burned
Belongings dispersed
Sharp reminder and silence echoing in your wake
Years will pass and I will hear that shot echo loud and clear

Butterflies drink from pools of blood collecting near my feet
Eyes wide open
Like a fish mouth gaping and gasping
The blood looks black in the moonlight
Sidewalk pavement hums with hesitant rain drops
Clouds block the moon above
The blood shimmers black
My hands are dry and so is my mouth
My teeth are chalk
There are things creeping in the lawn
They have seen the unseen
Maybe I'm one of them
The blood thins with rain water
Only my mouth is dry now
My hands drip with rain and parts of me
I am watered down, I am the blood, I am the rain
I run off the sidewalk and am swept down the street
The lawn and the unseen but a forgotten dream

Say 'hello' to the Earth when they bury you
Say 'how do you do' to the Worms and Ants
They're here to spread your Atoms
They're here to make you new
Matter cannot be created or destroyed
Your Atoms have always been here and they always will be
Welcome home

Shadows slash across the field as smoke and saxophone lull the tense muscles of my back.
Inhale smoke.
Exhale soul.
Streetlights paint the road orange and pollute the night above.
Sirens and hum of the city permiate the air.
Inhale smoke.
Exhale mind.
Doors locked to keep out strangers sweating with desperation.
Lights off to hide from supposed watching eyes.
Inhale smoke.
Exhale self.

I love you
For all the times I didn't say it
For all the times you didn't know it
I love you
For every breath you questioned it
For every bit of hurt
I love you
For every time I cut you off
For everything I do wrong
I love you
For the lines crossed
For the tears lost
I love you

The dead trespass through my mind
They cave in skulls through forced lobotomy
They strap the population for lethal injection
They take lead fists to soft flesh
Claws to clean eyes
Stealing voices
Cutting out pink tongues
Cramming microphone down your throat
Can you hear me now
Hammers and clubs slam death home with every blow
Tonight we let the victims show

I wear long coats and leather boots
I wear long billowing skirts
My hair dark and curly
I sing the blues
I drink gin and smoke ****
I put the joint out with my finger tips
I hike and make music with strangers
I read poetry and politics
I am friendly and confident
I go to sunshine and music
I dance bare foot
I walk with beasts
I tread lightly over the dead
I see birds gather and hear my name called
I look down
I see dirt
I see myself
I see growing and potential
I am not done growing yet
I have not reached the canopy
I have not caressed the sun
I wait, biding my time
I collect pieces of the dead
I remember and take heed