You took my heart
and threw it on the floor
You stepped on it, you broke it
and used the sharp edges
to cut my flesh in the shape of your name
Still it wasn't enough,
You poured salt on my open wounds,
spit on my scars and left

I miss the taste of your lips
With every sip of coffee

I miss the fragrance of your body
With every breath, I breathe

I miss the good old days
With every sleepless night, I survive

Oh, my beautiful nightmare!
Oh, my darling,
Let me love you
Till my fingertips memorize you.

i am sick of writing about you all the time.
my thoughts of you and the words that i write are intertwined,
and trying to unravel your ghost from my memories feels nearly impossible.

you are tattooed on my heart,
and with each thump a new line is generated-

thump
the heartbreak you have left me in feels like a maze i cannot find my way out of

thump
do you still find me as beautiful as you once did?

thump
i know that in my eyes you have never lost your charm

but i am sick of writing about you all the time.
because i am sick of feeling like this.
feeling like the entirety of my existence is so fragile,
depending on you to make me feel as if it is actually worth something,
depending on you to continue to reciprocate the feelings i have shared with you
even though deep inside i know that you are tired too.
tired of the see-saw like motions of our relationship...
even though, in our ups we felt like the king & queen of the world,
in our downs you no longer saw the point;
no longer see the point in trying to mend something you claim to be eternally broken.

am i sick for still trying?
why do i still allow myself to break my own heart over you?
is it because i still see potential where you see debris?

our love went up in flames,
and i think that we both tried to save as much of ourselves as we could from the fire...
save so much of ourselves
that we forgot about each other.

when i hear love songs
i only think of you

"And when you're gone,
I'll remember you
in my prayers
I'll remember you
in my songs."

And do me a favor,
write me
in your letters
and keep me
between the pages
of your diary.
Right where
the dead rose lies.

When your heart feels heavy:

1. Sit down in silence
2. Take off your shoulders
3. Hear your bones crack
4. Let your eyes breathe
5. Whisper to your heart,
it's home.

roses are red
night is dark
writing this poem
hurts my heart

shaky sobs
like violets, i'm blue
i'm wondering
why i ever loved you