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i see myself:

a
little tiny girl,
tear stained, broken..
.
pressed up against a glass
window that some might
call
a mirror,

and
submerged like a castle
in a fish tank, i
watch the way
that
little me swims
above
pretty little rainbow beads
and
picks at affection,
somehow
dropped from
the sky..
.

its
blue, pink, and
green;
and
there's a face in the clouds:

like rain, i
cry. looking down at
what once was..
.

and i remember why
that little girl
died.
whenever i recall my abuse i always feel like im looking through a glass window into a tank full of water or vice versa and it's a strange feeling.
Do you remember
The way her long hair fell,
And shone in the light?

Do you remember
Coming home and seeing her work,
The room filled with colored squares,
As she painted from old pots and jars?

Do you remember
The way she looked at you,
As if you were her entire world?

I remember.
I remember it all.
I remember the screaming,
the fights,
And the feeling that they may last forever.

I remember the pleading,
Begging her to stay,
As she fled your apartment,
Her items like a stampede,
making their way out the door.

I remember the first night alone,
The smashed picture frames,
Her face now a stranger,
Lying in the shards.
There's a guy in my life who I adore,
As a friend,
As a brother,
But nothing more.

No romantic feelings lie between us,
And that's okay.
To be honest,
We prefer it this way.

He is beautiful,
A true best friend.
We have a lot of good times,
I'll love him 'til the end.

In my heart rest our memories,
Of us walking,
Making big bonfires,
Or staying up all night talking.

I'll never forget our cat,
Gilligan.
But I cannot wait
Until we see him again.

For I'm proud to call him my family,
My brother,
And I know,
We'll always be here for each other.
I love you!
As we sat around the bonfire,
Laughing and loving,
Our spirits couldn't get any higher
And we laughed the night away

The smoke smelled nice,
As we made s'mores,
And burned our eyes,
But we smiled anyway

Music sweetly played,
Over our loud conversation,
But we still listened and swayed
In the cool winter night

I won't forget the fun,
The smiles,
From the ending or when it begun,
And in my heart it'll stay.
We locked eyes, met lips, and put bullets in our heads....

"This world wasn't made for love...."
Knowledge wakes up my dome with bombs thrown down my street.
I wake up, lost in dust & gun shells  
" Shhhh. Be quite. "
As the sound of 1000 soldiers stomp across my heart.
Time stood still.
As my mom gets snatched right in front of me
" MOM, MOM, PLEASE don't take her away!"
I try to get one final word
"I love you. "
But it's heard on the bullet that went threw her brain.
Because of that,
I will never be the same.
America took away the one I adore.
For what. ?
All because of this war. ?
Just because my mom dressed in a long robe that hides her face?
Means she's hiding a terrorist in this place?
My scars
Is ready to enbattle vengeance on the American race.
These open wounds won't stop these open minded bombs
These lies
Won't reverse time
These  open eyes
Won't stop the flashbacks
Of that
" STRAY BULLET! ".
And these soilders,
Won't stop this WAR.

©MH
I was talking to an lovely kid who was dealing with post traumatic stress disorder was telling me about the condition he was in and that's when I picked up my pen.
She whips me down
And drags me round
She roars like thunder
And my freedom is plunder
She spits and seethes
And still nothing pleases

And so I’ll leave
For she will not relieve
The torrid strain I am under
In this oh so monstrous dismal blunder
I’ll succumb to a sweet sleep
And I know you won’t weep
As I end my stay
Besides, who could dismay?
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