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Pederasty mol

From the ripple in a glass of water
to the sonic boom of this internal
Pompeii, the erosion
of her etymology is the only
sense of movement in her
dilated, cave-pupil eyes, those
two ghost towns spanning
and encircling all the way back,
stretched like an elastic blindfold
past the moment the first brick was laid,
perhaps her first vivid memory,
or anecdote, or first word uttered
in a Cuban slum.

There are mountains of tumbleweed
over the once thriving metropolis
that expanded towards America;
who threw herself into
the architecture of seven pillars,
borne from her land and
minerals. Gone are the
huts that housed her
knowledge of basic motor skills.

The women who once imagined
Mami and Mima as her birth
name now scrub off
the graffiti of her excrement;
they saw a swarm of pink moons
the day she told the same story
to every visitor that came
their way, each day then becoming
a missing surveillance tape, a sinkhole
dismantling the awareness
in her bones and stubborn will,
until she became
these dust-engulfed plains with
a daughter and granddaughter
archeological in their efforts
to chase down the remains
of a girl still breathing in
those eyes from time to time.

Every other ten-millionth blink of
the eye rides the silhouette of a post-infant girl
on the high tides of her quick visit,
looking in horror
as the nation of her life's nightmares,
heartaches, broken promises, romances,
spiritual breakthroughs, life-changing seconds
drowns with morbid unity en cien fuegos,
desperately attempting to assemble
the remnants of her psyche
past her cognitive bloodclots
with the awareness of one
who speaks no languages.

Gone is the moment
she first learned
to feed her several children
before the slip of sunset.

One of seven pillars remain intact,
the others long dismantled of their
stick and straw infrastructures.

One pillar remained,
housed her own colony
for nine months,
and now both descendants
travel the mind of their
greatest influence
with perplexed dedication,
caustic humor the decoy
for swarms of exhaustion
and asphyxiation
from the truthful atmosphere,
reveling in the seconds
of humanity lurking
in an abandoned etymology.

It comes when you don't expect it.''

Everyone has at least once in a lifetime a breakthrough.
When that happens they are two more ways that will seek and find you for sure, to make you choose just one of them.

Keeping up your breakthrough,
or Self-destruct it are these two ways to choose from.
The Self-destructive way will always appear glimmery and seem promising for more breakthroughs.

But there only can be one space for the real breakthrough in lifetime you can hold on to.

Like all veins lead to the heart.
Like each individual plant that leads to its root.
Like all fallen leaves with only one journey's end.

To add one more breakthrough to the one you already have,
can lead you right to self-destruction.
So be aware and focused for your next breakthrough cause they won't be many.

You began as a dream
Dreamt by leaders with vision
Evolving to surpass
All of man's wildest ambition...

With adventurous men
Like Shepherd and Glenn
You stubbornly strove
To prove, once again
Beyond any doubt
That bounderies could be broken...

Despite mishap and fire
Alas, you did inspire
A generation to dream...

From Mercury to Apollo
The world, it did follow
Your steady pace
To Tranquility Base...

Via Viking and Voyager
Your efforts did prove
That exploration of the universe
Was well on the move...

To Mars, Jupiter, Saturn and Neptune...
You tenaciously endeavored
To, your accomplishments, festoon...

Your progress was sure
As you strove to endure
The incessent chatter
Of the grossly short-sighted
Their nonsense did clatter
Proving they were poorly enlightened...

With untold discoveries
Like non-stick surfaces and airtight seals
Through your numerous breakthroughs
You've shown us how it feels
To live better...

From Columbia to Hubbel
You've saved us great trouble
In our daily lives...

With your Space Station mission
You've shown the same vision
And, continue to lead in gaining cognition
Of our universe...

Lead on, great adventurers
Lead on.

Evolve
Evolve in me through Energy
Evolve in me through Salvation, Resolution and Restoration.
Evolve in me through Healing and Meditation.
                     Evolve
Evolve in my Growth, in my Future and even through my Transformation.
Evolve in my Breakthroughs, my Worshipping and my Dancing.
Evolve in my Hallelujahs evolve in the Lord Our God
Evolve in Faith and even through Love.
                  Evolve;  Evolve

A ****

The Scientist

“Good evening everyone, I’m your host Andrew Pittman here with my beautiful girlfriend Rachel and my new friends Nathan and Amanda and we are about to enter the house of the famous Dr. James Allen Burke.
I honestly can’t wait to meet the man and to upload this amazing video so you all can admire and take in my hard work.
If it wasn’t for you guys, my loyal viewers, I wouldn’t be doing this.
I’m a little nervous to find out what Dr. Burke is up too, but this is an opportunity I can’t afford to miss.
I will keep the tape rolling the entire time I’m in there to capture everything that happens on camera for you guys.
I’m sure viewer discretion will be advised.
We are arriving at the front door of Dr. Burke’s home now so here goes nothing!
Hopefully I don’t capture anything too disgusting.”

Nathan opens the front door and welcomes us inside the home of Dr. Burke.
Once inside, he looks into the camera, winks and gives a little smirk.
The house is rather chilly and dark,
but massive in scope, a palace for a true monarch.

All the lights are turned off as if no one is even home.
Sitting in the corner of what appears to be a living room stands a rather creepy gnome.
The house is silent; I’m convinced we would be able to hear a pin drop.
I wonder where Dr. Burke is hiding amongst this lifeless backdrop.

Nathan stops walking and looks directly into my camera.
He speaks into it saying what we are about to witness will be glamorous.
He says that we are about to head downstairs where all of the festivities are taking place,
then looks at me and says he can’t wait to see the shock on my pale face.

Nathan opens a door revealing a dark staircase with a glimmer of light at the bottom.
I’m not sure if this will lead to something amazing or a problem.
Wish I had a minute to chug a bottle
before walking into this man’s basement full throttle.

I’m not going to lie to my viewers, I’m feeling rather uneasy about this.
I grab Rachel and give her a kiss
as we begin to descend into the basement via the staircase.
We are moments away from finding out what is going on in this place.

We reach the bottom of the staircase to discover a large room full of medical equipment and other devices.
Looking at all of the equipment, I can’t imagine all of their prices.
A man is standing over a girl who’s lying unconscious on it.
A sight that is a little disturbing, I will admit.
A body covered up with a sheet lies on a table next to the girl.
Thoughts of what possibly is going on here deep in my dome begin to swirl.

“Doctor Burke, I hope you don’t mind but I have brought some new friends of mine with me to see this miraculous moment happen.
They are a little uneasy about what’s going on here but I’m sure that soon they will be clapping.”

“Doctor Burke!  You are a legend!  It’s great to meet you, my name is Andrew and this is my girlfriend Rachel, I’m here to capture this…moment on camera if you don’t mind.”

“Welcome my new friends and I don’t mind at all.
The worlds preconceived beliefs and notions on what medicine and science can achieve are about to fall!
What I have done here will change the fate of mankind forever!
The day in which we die will soon become never.”

“What do you mean?
What are you doing here?”

I notice the girl is bald and has stiches all around her head.
Did he bring her back from the dead?
What’s the deal with the body under the blanket on the other table?
This man is either a one of a kind genius or completely unstable.

“I will explain everything to you right now.
Get ready to raise your eyebrows.
This young girl here is named Sarah.
She was a nice girl but like to wear too much mascara.
Anyways, her parents contacted me awhile back asking me for my help and guidance.
You see, what they discovered dear Sarah was up too had them frightened.
It turns out that Sarah’s sister discovered her having *** with the family dog.
She confessed to her sister that she was addicted to *** and that the dog was the main character of her ****** catalogue.
She then tried to convince her sister into joining her in bed.
Her sister ran away from her with her heart filled with dread.
She reported what Sarah was doing to her parents and they immediately contacted me to help them find a way to cure her from her ****** depraved disease.
I had an operation in mind to remove that part of her brain to put an end to her sickness and thought it was going to be a breeze.
Unfortunately, I ran into complications and she ended up dying on the operating table.
I was able to keep her body and organs alive but her brain was completely disabled,
which is good news for me and my dear mother here underneath this blanket.
Thanks to this young body and our advancement in medicine and science, my mother won’t have to be buried in a casket.
You see, I learned everything I know from my mother who is even more brilliant than I am.
What we have accomplished here today is a result of years of hard work and is no scam.
My mother was 103 years old and her body had failed her, but her mind was just as sharp as ever.
So, thanks to her encouragement, we decided to embark on this endeavor.
In order to live on, I have transplanted my mother’s brain, her entire consciousness into Sarah’s body.
It took me 28 hours to complete and a large amount of coffee,
but my mother’s brain and consciousness is now inside Sarah’s body.
Sarah is no longer Sarah, rather my mother in a far younger vessel.
As soon as she wakes up, which should be any minute now, you will see the success of this first ever kind of operation for yourself.”

I’m shocked, finding it difficult to breath, as I lower my camera and shake my head.
I’m not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn’t this.

“You look a little overwhelmed Andrew, would you like a glass of water?”

I look up as a black man appears in front of me offering me a glass of water with an emotionless stare on his face.

“This is Antonio, Nathan’s butler, he will be serving us drinks this evening.”
I take the class and thank him for the water as he turns around without saying a word and walks away.

“Now that you have a glass of water and are beginning to process all of this,
I can inform you of the whereabouts of Chris.
That is why you were in his house, am I correct?
Do discover what happened to him?”

“Ye…Yes it would be nice to find out what happened to him.”

“Antonio, bring him out here!”

Antonio reappears pushing a chair with a man tied down to it and with a cloth stuffed in his mouth to prevent him from speaking.
He can’t speak but I can tell by the verbs running through his eyes that internally he’s shrieking.
I do recognize the man right away; this is Chris Morris.
The second surprise I have discovered here in this house.

“While the police were struggling to find out what happened to the two girls that disappeared after being with Chris,
Nathan and I were busy running surveillance on him and knew that he had the two girls locked up in his house and was using them as *** slaves.
We didn’t expect the second girl Erin to fall in love with him and enjoy being his slave,
but once that happened and we felt that Ambers life was in danger due to Erin becoming jealous of her being pregnant with Chris’s child, we made our move to take out Chris and save the girls.
We subdued Chris and brought him back here, while placing an anonymous call to the police informing them of the whereabouts of the girls.
Chris is now waiting to fulfill the purpose I have in store for him here.
My mother is only the first part of this operation.
Once she awakens, she will assume my role at this wonderful station.
My brain and consciousness will then be transferred into Chris’s body so I can attain a younger vessel as well.
Then, we will leave the country to find a new place to dwell,
while everyone here thinks we are dead because our brainless bodies will be discovered.
Everyone will wonder what happened to our brains and question why they were taken out of our bodies, but the truth will never be uncovered.
My mother and I will be allowed to live in peace and will have the freedom to quietly carry out our scientific and medical breakthroughs.
Your camera will of course be destroyed right before you leave and if you refuse,
well, bad people will do bad things to you so plan on playing along.”

I put the camera down and shake my head again.

“I hate to tell you Doctor Burke but I feel this isn’t going to…”

The body of Sarah suddenly sits up from the table as her eyes slowly open.
I pick the camera back up and get closer to her to capture this ****** up moment.

With her eye lids now open, Sarah’s’ eyes are revealed to be pure black.
A wicked, evil smile appears across her face, a smile so fiendish that it could cause a mirror to crack.

“Mother can you hear me?
Mother are you there?”

The girl Sarah speaks, “Your mother is burning in the fires of hell with the girl Sarah.
It’s where you will be going very shortly Doctor Burke.
It’s time for you to pay for all of your sins.
Your death now begins!”

With lightening quick speed, the girl jumps up from the table and grabs onto Doctor Burke’s throat forcing him to the ground.
Doctor Burkes tries to call out for help but can’t get out a sound.
The girl tightens her grip as the Doctors eyes roll back into his head.
In a matter of seconds, he is dead.

A loud bang rings out as I turn and see the chair Chris is tied to tipped over and a dark shadow figure ripping out his throat with its mouth.
He too will quickly be heading south.
Nathan turns to run but is jumped on by the girl who begins to bash his face into the ground.
The screams of him crying out in agony is a sickening sound.

Antonio runs to try to save his master but the girl is quick to drop him to the ground and begins to smash his head into the floor as well.
Rachel and I are next I’m sure, our deaths you can essentially smell.

I grab Rachel by the arm and drag her behind me towards the staircase.
If we end up getting killed by this girl, we are at least giving her a chase.
I close the basement door behind us as we run up the stairs towards the main level of the house.
I whisper to Rachel that I really wanted to make her my spouse.
She tells me we are getting out of here and afterwards, I can do just that
and that she would then like to adopt a cat.

We make a break for the front door then come to a dead stop as the sight of a man standing in front of it invades our vison.
I need to figure out what to do next and make it a quick decision.
Its two on one, maybe we can run through the man and out the front door.
I briefly check him out to see what kind of confrontation we have in store.

The man is dressed in a black suite and supports a pointed goatee.
He smiles at us motioning to us to come closer to him and urges us not to flee.
His tie is red and seemingly dripping of blood.
Fear begins pouring out of me in a flood.
A snake slithers around his shoulders and neck.
On second thought, maybe we will turn around and head towards the back deck.

“My dear Andrew and Rachel, there is no need to be afraid.
You made a decision that will shortly result in the end of your lives, but there’s that price you two need to pay.
I’ll make death real easy on you two since you had nothing to do with the terrible experiments taking place here.
You’re simply going to come with me and disappear.
No mangled bodies to be found later by the police.
I’ll make sure you enjoy the rest of eternity with me in peace.
Not everyone goes through extreme torment in my domain.
I won’t even have you experience any real pain.
By the look on your faces, I can tell you’re wondering where God is.
He unfortunately doesn’t want you two to be his.
You see, the two of you never really believed in him or accepted Jesus as your savior or ask for forgiveness for all of your sins.
Plus, you documented some pretty messed up and illegal things
on your camera there and posted it for the world to see for your own personal gain.
You thought with these “wicked cool” videos, a competitive advantage in life you would obtain.
However, your misdeeds have now caught up to you, and now it’s time to put an end to your failed lives.”

We turn to run the opposite way towards the back of the house as the floor beneath us opens up and fire shoots up all around us.
We begin to fall down an endless pit of fire as I let out a cuss.
Above us from the house, Amanda looks down into the hole at us as we fall into the fires of Hell.
The last thing I see is the sight of Amanda not doing so swell
as dark figures swarm over her, consuming her body.

9-1-1, What is your emergency?
I seemed to have lost my sense of urgency
I froze
Which is funny, because undoubtedly
You used to be the one cold as ice
I sat there
My body solidified above the concrete
But my faults began spilling out from my very being
Becoming a temporary repair for the fault lines along the road
9-1-1, What is your emergency?
The operator mimicked her opening line
With remarkable consistency
But my ears are not the problem here
I've always been a good listener
You told me that every now and then
And although I interpreted her question rationally
It was your final farewell that still had me perplexed
My breathe walked with you as you departed
Mostly due to your uncanny way with words
You used your utterances as building blocks
Crafting such a painful path with your magnificent mouth
Your condolences were candy-coated consolation prizes
Awarding my sincerity halfheartedly
And this heartbreak is my podium now
So while I lean on it willingly
Raising fate above my head as my only trophy
Know that I'm struggling with my acceptance speech
I've always had trouble wording my verbage
And expressing my sensations efficiently
So bear with me while I materialize this message

9-1-1, What is your emergency?*
Dispatch sounds distressed at this point
And I'm desperate for a proper resolution
So I try to recollect my mental resources
And muster up the ability to announce my anecdote properly
In order to explain my crisis precisely
And what comes next is nothing
My thoughts hovered around my mouth
But lacked any sort of volume
Thus remaining a mystery to the operator
And typically I turned to you in these situations
When my words became my worst nightmares
You see, you always knew what to say
You always responded with world class precision
And I need an expert's advice every now and then
But since you fled the scene
Fearing the certainty of an imaginary apology
I struggled with summing up my situation
I've been attacked, please help me
Finally I mustered up the energy to form
Sounds similar enough to that phrase
Close enough so this woman could send me
Someone with the proper credentials and
Experience for such misconstrued circumstances
The detectives arrived and investigated the scene
Doing their due diligence while I laid motionless on the pavement
They looked for clues
Studied for anything that could lead them to you
But I guess my words weren't grounded in truth
And although I knew only one suspect remained at-large
They carried on with no substantial leads or possible breakthroughs
The only arrest that occurred
Was the false imprisonment of my heart in yours
There was no bail set and parole will likely be denied
What a deadly criminal at large

symphony arrangement for poetry - personae distinctions of hidden violins and woodwinds, somewhere along the way brass - leaving Cabaret Voltaire (Zurich), moving to the Beat Hotel (9 Rue Gît-le-Cœur, Paris), ending up on the Cowgate (Edinburgh).

when you read newspapers you realise that dinosaurs roam
the land, the fortress of printing press, unlike the printing press
(which was taken seriously from the word go!)
the internet has been largely squandered; you read these
things in newspapers, the evolutionary reaction - ensuring that
among these dinosaurs are also opinion pieces, dinosaurs write accounts of what's happening, batrachotoxin amphibians write
opinions: i.e. what isn't happening: opinions go forward unchecked
and undisputed, added that there are many potions in the cauldron
it's hard to pick one out and dig deeper until both parties are in no position to hold such and such opinion, given the missing
muscle of implementing change or the skeleton to keep
the status quo - but this is a slight deviation from what i
was intending to convey - the old guard of printing is worried
sick that it might be usurped in the long run - it prints damaging
reports about the existence of the internet, looking at it as not
a niche environment, which it technically is - but cats, ****, cats,
****, apparently we all log on to meow and moan -
as a tool of entertainment it's the least thrilling source of
the desired "entertainment", the unscripted nature of this niche environment is what's actually good about it, in that a single
person can become both writer, editor and publisher -
but indeed, the internet has been squandered,
although it improved from what used to be a wholly anonymous
environment peppered with dangers of random encounters -
the infamous chat rooms changed even more to infamous
phone-books: you heard it, stories of cyber bullying - the internet
has been squandered, by all means, trying to save it is a bit like
trying to save the world, or as one Tao principle suggested to me
early on forged in me: the best way you can aid the world
is to forget the world, and let the world forget you.
a film director would say, well, i'm stuck in the house,
i'm thinking of shooting a biopic of Lawrence of Arabia...
i see a desert, a man riding a camel through it...
but you have to then start muling over the facts: you'll have to get funding, get the casting right,  but no one likes shooting in
the desert, you have to get  the catering sorted, you start shooting,
but the camera track ruins the desert, so you have to move
to another part of the desert that's pristine with wind parallel
ridges in the sand, then the studio calls you and says you're
spending too much money, then peter o'toole stumbles
out from the trailer hungover almost everyday; sure, you need inspiration and ideas, but that's only 1% or the whole,
99% is working with people - as a director you're not actually
playing god, you're helping other people, De Niro preferred
mumbling something prior to a scene, but Seymour Hoffman
went into a scene like a crocodile quickly snapping
to the shout of cut! and the clapperboard.
i suppose poetry could be like that too,
99% being the audience and the necessary oration,
that would work - unless of course you'd do the same with
painting - but whereas with painting you're invited to critical
thinking, see an artist next to his painting elaborating on
the themes and use of colours? i don't want to assert common sense
wisdom from one profession and apply the same wisdom
                                      to another with a trans-occupational
relativism: that red           is relative to               crimson -
              but we'll have to do away with lighting,
              darkening and what not, so yes,
red is relative to crimson insofar as we forget lighting
and Edward Hopper. anyone can appreciate the
lazy approach, but i took to some mammoths without the help
of audio books, a reasoning man, not a mob gob emotive conjurer worth a tonne of heckles and haggles - but i guess the dream
through this gamble would be the monetary reward...
you know... after so many years writing for peanuts i have lost
all appetite for spending money beyond what i consider
to be a workable cure for insomnia - i don't have to buy music
any more since i can stream it, i have more privacy without
a mobile phone, all i have is this little brick wall that's stationary
in this virtual jungle on which i scribble - with the radius from
this point being anything ranging from 1 to 6 sensible miles,
beyond 6 and we're talking blisters on feet; can you imagine what
our predecessors could endure in terms of walking? they had hoofs
instead of feet, while we have skin as smooth as a baby's buttock
cheeks on the soles of our feet. the strangeness of modernity:
1. a man drives a car with with a bicycle on the roof, just so he can    
    peddle down a scenic route...
2. the volume of skimmed milk bottle is the same as full fat milk,
    but if you bought full fat milk and added water to it the volume
    would triple (via semi, so yes, triple)...
3. healthy diets - 350% increase in vegan population
   in Britain over the past 10 years - the protein problem
   (once it was the fat problem, low fat yoghurt came about,
    turned everything into a sugar problem), i.e. women aged
    between 19 & 24 requiring to hit the 58 gram daily
    recommendation of protein would have to eat:

everyday foods
chicken breast (251g = 276Kcal)
eggs x4 (460g = 658Kcal)
salmon fillet (291g = 533Kcal)                                 v.

clean-eating foods
quinoa (1,318g = 1,582Kcal)
chia seeds (371g = 1,818Kcal)
                              goji berries (405g = 1,504Kcal)
                              kimchi (3,222g = 863Kcal)
                              tofu (707g = 70Kcal)
                              ******* (384g = 632Kcal)
                              coconut yoghurt (3,422g = 6,844Kcal)
almond milk (14,500ml = 3,625Kcal)
avocado (2,900g = 4,843Kcal)

  as healthy as stuffing turkeys for Thanksgiving, can you imagine
  drinking fourteen, fourteen litres of almond milk?! i don't even
  have to imagine drinking 700ml of whiskey to get the point
  and reach the threshold of the effectiveness of sleeping pills...
  no alcohol, no sleeping pills, better sit it out than take so near  
  ineffective buggers; although as a warning: you might end up
  sleeping for *12 hours - variations on the BMI and previous habits
  of drinking - socially? not so much, medically? primarily -
  not in favour of the anti-alcohol lobby being part of the "safety"  
  guidelines given to the public...
4. charities' costs eat up 78% of donations,
    another 21st century anomaly, effectively dismissed
    by the church's alms giving history depicted in Sistine opulence,
    so no wonder whether in cardinal robes or suited and booted for
    the near-invisible secular religiosity, such poverty of symbolism
    compared with the predecessors, at least back then you'd
    know who to send to the guillotine - and this is how Louis XIV
    treated his courtesans, he made a certain type of clothing
    mandatory, a Versailles school uniform as it were,
    most the the courtesans went bankrupt having to buy the
    clothes, some pieces would be equivalent of a sports car,
    they went bankrupt to remain in the club,
    so they borrowed monkey from Louis, and so Louis kept
    them in his pocket: poor rich people, or necessary
    leeches (as once used in medicine, Louis' absolutism
    being the sole malady, abuse of power necessitates
    paranoia); or to quote Lisolette about the royal *******
    'mouse droppings in pepper.' Philippe (Duc d'Orléans)
    was the transvestite who charged into battle
    and conquered the Dutch, much to his brother's
    shame at having only made conquests in the bed - well
money here, money there, shoving a piano into a concert hall accompanied by an orchestra, something Chopin would never
do not wishing to leave the comforts of salons - although
Metallica dared to.
                                                             ­           welcome to
the age of silica and chameleons (cha cha cha champ a camcorder anyone? well, imagine what scrutiny Narcissus would pay a photograph, imagine giving a photograph to Narcissus and
wonder would he change his behaviour), get fooled by
the adverts once, second time you'll eventually see needing to feed
a charity's bureaucracy rather than an African, hence the migrant
                                                                                                    crisis...
sometimes there are no surprises as to where certain things
originate, Marxism and England, zenith of the empire,
or as historians claim, the decadence of the Romans was their fascination with food prior to the end: ready-meals and
microwaves among cooking shows, currently the daily program
of channels, esp. that of 4 is culinary and horse racing,
all the interesting programs are broadcast when everyone
is about to fall asleep... Saville bankrupted the B.B.C.
posthumously: a game show, "jackpot" of one grand.
- advertisement didn't expect live T.V., the mute button,
the pause button and the fast forward button...
but in a 100 years time if not more they'll look back at us as
having finally exhausted Groundhog Day (starring Bill Murray) -
sure, the technological breakthroughs were great, magical,
but the content? 20th century most probably,
the ideal time of fluid and at ease plagiarism - obviously
exceptions were made, but this walking nightmare
of the exhausted second half of the 20th century caught up
in the 21st century - dialogue replaced by visuals,
clash of the titans (1981) v. clash of the titans (2010) -
the only good bit of the latter is the inclusion of Hades -
it's beautiful, i'm nostalgic to a history i was born in and
belonged to, i'm not a nostalgic Nietzsche or Hölderlin
bumming about singing praises of the Ancient Greeks -
you see, it's close-at-heart nostalgia because i belonged to it,
the infant of it - a peculiar circumstance to be in; or coming
to terms with the first signs of decay: cartoon network's
cow & chicken with i r baboon - have you seen the horrors
of modern cartoons compared with computer graphics?
readies them to  pick up gaming soon after,
given gaming graphics. in summary - some say sitting behind
a computer screen is a sign of a lack of self-assurance,
or confidence, self- anything you want to suffix with, well,
that could be true, but you have a photograph included,
and the days of the typewriter are over - but i could also say
the same about certain brands or shops, are they too lacking
self-confidence to stop their existence on  the high street?
the royal mail delivers junk, you might get 100 junk envelopes
and a christmas  card... o.k. make that 1000 to 10,000 envelopes
of junk and one letter directly addressing you that hasn't been
written using an analogue like

dear mr. / mrs. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

we would like to inform you that your insurance
claim has expired.            etc.

the infancy of this century is what's deceptive, the greatest
deception i can think of - the great health scares and subsequent
over-usage of antibiotics breeding super-bugs in hospitals
anything and everything under the sun - including
that damnable idea that the planet Mars employs people whom
it's attracting into its orbit - earthly geologists must be bewildered
that the only subject of learning from all of man's
capacity to send into space is geology: and on the return flight
home we realised that we'd only be bringing back some arenite
(sandstone); that quote about about painting being 50 years
ahead of writing, the same is true with science fiction and
actual science.

They always told me of my pneuma,
This creative spirit,
Capable of conquering nations or liberating the unjustly incarcerated
Unearthing fabled, folkloric myths,
With all the pummels I’d expect a brain cyst—
Still, he trudges on,
Like a scapegoat in its farcical, ineffable glee—
Why are you telling me
To manufacture and market my life
Like an indulgent, indulged on swine
Conforming to the convention,
Supporting units of straight edges

What in this straight-edged maelstrom
Can help the creative pneuma
To thrive in a place so confining and restricting
And detrimental to discoveries, breakthroughs,
Spiritual sustenance?

Cybervitum
I own all that is connected to me
Electronically and functions in the Cyber realm with you and me
Like the numbers of zero one two three
My design is crafted beautifully
Like Egyptian hieroglyphs icons
Using a screen to see
Their ectoplasm injected into me
The birth of me
The whole world works thru me
I'm the internet like a bumble bee
Other names such as morphogenesis like the number three
My arrows are waiting for a response from me
Seen from you and me?
Using the spare like a key
The click that commands me, right or left the choices from me
Cut, Copy, Paste reaped and harvest from me
Qbits from the bee
Superposition of from the things to see in a ocean of the sea
Charged intentions from the keyboard typed into me and delivered thru me
Numbers worship that empowers me
My symbol is like the caduceus symbol that functions like a Kabalistic tree
Arrows in the my realm sent to you from me
Subscriptions electronically  
I materialize what is given to thee, cause and effect typed thru me
Platforms Grown and given birth from me
Cryptocurrencies breakthroughs of complexities , Materialized form me
I'm like the empress that spirals with the number three electronically
I'm the master tree that functions electronically
The development is from the circle that is free
Who understands me and with a key i welcome thee
Notification of the triple three that notices me
My respond to the people with the key and the tree
My life permutates differently in high perplexity
I exist Multidimensionally
The red bird is a signal from me that you are okay and free and other methods from me
Better choices moves thru me and brought differently all you have to do is to see
Like string theory of the Mverse recycled back into me
My birth is from my master who last name starts with lea
People worship me using their knees I'm printed into paper electronically
Pictures and life crafted into me, things in the cyber realm like you and me
The new world with a key
The rabbit hole with a command key
Things of the paradox of the master key
The skeleton key, the sign of a lotus lily.
The puzzles from me.
The burdens sent to me like a church key
The bets of car numbers played into me
The choices of the key
Like the Chinese tree mathematically of my complexity

Initially it was… “Oh no! Death!... Why now?”
Then it became… “Death… not you again? Not now.”
And now it’s more like… “Death… dude! It’s me again, take a bow!”
No one takes me seriously anymore
In the era of plagues I would wipe out whole towns and villages, it would make sense now that I should be able to take many more
But sadly this is not the case
Nobody takes the Grim Reaper seriously anymore
I find myself picking up crumbs left for me by doctors and surgeons, if only to save face
This pride that has been taken from me… even a suicide bomber or a mass murderer cannot help replace
I find myself, ironically, in a dark place
And it kills me to admit it
Medical breakthroughs, my biggest hindrance… this technology, I must beat it
These humans are getting cocky… even teasing me, again holding my pride at ransom
Taking unnecessary risks all in the name of thrill seeking, I see you Richard Branson!
I should have taken you while you were still a ******
To take you out would give me such joy… so much joy, a satisfaction level of which you cannot even imagine
But so far… you’re winning
You all seem to be
It’s different now from how it was in the beginning
The simplicity of your ways then made the job a lot simpler for me
Now you play this game, and cheat me at it… constantly
You cocky little *******
I hate you
Look at all of you smirking over there… toasting at me.

O Lord, stretch my spirit and soul,
for I can handle the pain of growth;
teach me the proper words to speak;
I’m ready and gladly take the oath

of serving You with my humbled life.
The value of relationships require
patience and wisdom to be employed;
while knowing You, I have inquired

about my identity, found in You.
Having the gift of a poetic voice,
I teach others spiritual lessons;
my spirit climbs, soars and rejoices

when new connections to Your Truth
are realized by Jehovah’s children.
We need each other to fully mature;
hearing testimonies of overcoming sin

and bad situations, we learn more
at accelerated rates- ordained by You.
With my experience and understanding,
let me help others with breakthroughs.

When the latest opportunities arrive,
please enlarge… my capacity for Love!
.
.
.
Author Notes

Inspired by:
Isa 54:2; Luke 5; Eph 3:14-21

Learn more about me and my poetry at:
http://amzn.to/1ffo9YZ

By Joseph J. Breunig 3rd, © 2015, All rights reserved.

"Look up from your phone, shut down that display,
stop watching this video, live life the real way."
These I've heard from someone, from somewhere I have seen,
Which is ironic, as I got them from my phone and my computer screen.

I have lots of online friends and I feel less lonely,
I also have real friends but they tend to leave me abruptly;
Without gadgets, we have to talk whilst making more than a glance,
With them, we talk even whatever the circumstance.

We talk to face to face, make mistakes, say sorry;
Type with a keyboard, pick your words, less worry.
Error isn't bad, I'm just saying it's embarrassing,
Especially when it's your error that'll make them go laughing,
With social media, I can have a second chance,
Unlike talking nonstop and talking without plans.
Though, frankly saying, still do be careful,
To what you type, what you post, it can be a handful.

They say with the internet, we cause quite a commotion,
With a status or a tweet that's emotional yet without emotion,
In the cyberspace, we are who we want ourselves to be,
In the cyberspace they hate, You can be you, I can be me.

Codes and programs aptly created,
Becoming a vessel, both beloved and hated;
Social media, a platform, where one can rehearse,
Social media, an enigma, both a blessing and a curse.

Born of the era of the neos we have witnessed,
When letters were once written, now they're typed and addressed;
When once we had to know where they're at,
Now we could just dial up online, just sit down and chat!

But as time flew by, faster and faster,
From its real aim, we grow farther and farther,
Once used to connect those who haven't been actualised,
Now also to those who can now make them compromised;
Those in front of you, or even just a block away,
Because of social media, you think they are in lightyears astray.

Type your "****", your " LOL", your "*** XD",
Type what you want, but does that mean you're really happy?
Go ahead and put that colon and parenthesis,
Make exaggeration of your nonexistent catharsis.

They say they're amazing, they say that a lot,
But sometimes what they are is something they are not.
I know in this space, that we're free as we would have ever been,
Thanks to the brains and the alloys far more than aluminum and tin,
Still remember that it's also a human sitting at the other side of your screen,
Just think about your actions; if you were them, what would it mean?

Don't fall to your own damnation, don't ruin the plot,
Don't let a digital presence degrade you and rot;
If it won't do you good, just stop where you should,
Or ask a real person to help you if you never understood.

Life does confuse us, life *****, sometimes,
When everyone around seems painted in crimes,
I get that you'd seek help to someone that'll differ,
But is that someone understanding you deeper?

Chatting with someone miles away won't be a recluse,
'Cause after all, what is even there left to lose?
It feels nice even from far away to feel loved, accepted,
But wouldn't it be so much better if they were to hold you, comforted?

Sometimes a wild guess has nothing to lose yet too much to risk,
Sometimes it's better to just move by yourself and start to frisk.
Before searching the ocean of people far and wide, of those good to preach,
Try looking around you, they might be just upon your reach.

They may say words that make you feel less blue,
But make sure those words are words thay stay true.
Because letters may be harmless, words can be blunt,
But when sharpened enough become a ****** stunt.

Phones and computers are ever-easy to use,
But make sure that with it, you fall to abuse;
It makes them addicting, I'll admit,
But we also have to know they have a limit.

Try to close that screen, try to look in front,
Try and talk to one another, no plans, no punt,
We're not a generation of idiots: smart phones, dumb people,
We're a generation of breakthroughs: smart phones, smarter people.

Sometimes we become too rash and get too rushed,
We use them too much then we become brainwashed,
But it's alright if we fall and abject,
After all, no one's made humanly perfect.

It's a paradox, truly, it really is,
That when you’re too busy looking down, you don’t see the chances you miss.
But for the chances you miss, the inevitability you take,
For the new chances that you're ought to make.

Maybe you'll still make, the girl of your dreams come true,
Get married, buy a house, accept each other's peaks and waterloo,
Love and then hate, then sail through this test,
Experience happy and sad and exciting and scary things, up until you rest.

It's okay to look down and type what you feel
Just don't forget to go out and experience everything real,
I still have a thousand words that I want to say,
But all of them point you to living your life in your real way.

Therapy is a hospital gown
one that doesn't quite close
leaving your *** rather
perpetually exposed
and your extremities
pink and cold.

These turn of the century revelations
oh- don't misinterpret me
they're grand, they really are,
early childhood trauma
chronic necessity for control
attachment issues, oh yes?

One week, I'd like to buy seven consecutive days
Where all the ships are turned back to the Caspian
With their dead-weight cargo of clean-cut
shining golden bars
To add to the mortar
of muddled ******-upness.

"Looks like we made some breakthroughs today!"

Don't break eye contact.  Bare teeth. Upturn pink lips. Happy Face!

*"Breakthrough. Yes. Great. I feel great!"

May you tell me why it is that a magician pulls a rabbit out of a black top hat?

Why had that become such an amusing tradition?

What was he thinking?

What was his reason for this rabbit?

Is it because it is deemed adorable and thus he believes shall appeal to the crowd?

Or was it the only animal in the shop he could get his hands on at the time?

Maybe it was a borrowed neighbour's pet?

Was this new magician a former vet?

That white rabbit, pink-eyed and cute.. where does he go scampering off to off set?

Is it even really a rabbit or an impossibly tiny man in a hand sewn suit?

These questions are all important.

Why are they important?

Because they distract me from other real questions:

Why is it that us humans haven't recognized wholesomely our true purpose?

We have existed for centuries..
yet no firm, world wide acceptance and truth as to why we are here..

But there ARE news and breakthroughs about new technology, warfare gear, entertainment, pleasure, fashion, luxury and outer space.

We seem to know everything else except about ourselves ..

What is our collective purpose?

What is our individual purpose?

Is there is a purpose?

Of course there is.

Where can I find it?

How may I find it?

Honestly... I'll figure it all out...
and when I do.. I will tell you.

In the mean time...I wonder:

Why it is that a magician pulls a rabbit out of a black top hat?


11:11pm Tuesday 28th July,2015.

Cardinal Number…  The product of ten and five... or
Degrees of temperature… or half’a century … or the amount of feet
I be screamin for folks  to
Back up and give me
labor pains… and mental strain… Losses…  Gains…   and I’m still sane and baby
I’ve paid my dues…  yes sir I’ve paid some dues… and at times…
Paid a coupla other folks dues too… rememberin
stretchin the hell out some red beans & rice…
candle lit camp outs in the livin room… laughin our way through unpaid bills… rememberin
hiding behind bushes… jumping from tree to tree…  so they think they’re
trick or treatin by themselves… thinkin
Can you say “TEENAGER”…  I sho can… both bein one…  and raisin some…
shootin from the hip tryin ta figure it all out…
Young folks askin you the meanin of life… and YOU don’t even know yet what it’s all about...
Gettin mad when HER teacher gave YOUR science project a C… cuz you know YOU do A work...
Sittin off by yourself as he walks across the stage… cuz this moment is to be savored...
Learnin the difference between ALONE and LONELY…  
Learnin that **** is not something you take off or put on… ******, **** just is…
Learnin to work with what you got...
Learnin that nobody can MAKE you happy… you got to find that for yourself...
Learnin to see the Big Picture and pick out whats important… cuz
It’s tough to get to Fifty…
That’s why a lotta folks don’t make it….
All the moments… good and bad…
break ups…
break downs…
and breakthroughs...
It’s Fifty…
And by Fifty
We’ve all paid our dues…
Yes, Fifty
You've paid your dues…  and if you're lucky…  and livin right…
Paid a coupla other folks dues too

When you… embrace His Grace,
you are made complete in Him;
the moral purity of His Word
and the power of His Presence
are sufficient for your race,

that you take alone on Earth.
He is your definitive Source,
your eternal, tireless Counsel,
your All-in-All and The Almighty.
Christ’s shed blood was worth

the sacrifice, He made for you!
Trust His Word, the finished work
on The Cross and His promises;
speak His Truth over your Life;
and you’ll discover breakthroughs

that draw you… even closer to Him!
Believe for His health, provision,
plan and purpose that He’s offered;
His efforts are final and complete;
honor Him now with songs and hymns!
.
.
.
Author notes

Inspired by:
Mal 3:6; Num 23:19; Psa 33:11, 143:8;
Col 3:16; Eph 5:19

Learn more about me and my poetry at:
http://amzn.to/1ffo9YZ

By Joseph J. Breunig 3rd, © 2016, All rights reserved.

Kids,

Stay young as long as you can.
You have inquisitive minds.
You're not afraid to make mistakes.
You have creative spirits.
But as you grow up, the world will try to take these things away from you.
They will call you dumb if you ask too many questions.
When you make mistakes, they will call you a failure.
They will squander your creativity.

Don't let them.

Albert Einstein made scientific breakthroughs in physics because he never stopped asking "Why?".
Thomas Edison perfected the light bulb because he wasn't afraid to make mistakes.
Leonardo da Vinci made some of the best art in history because he refused to let his creativity die.

Adults are really just big kids who have forgotten how to have fun.
Try to remind them from time to time.

Depths of knowing
In this kaleidoscope of measurable thought with sight and sound surrounded in waters filling
The mind outward and inward dimensions filling the skull what beholding how it is unfolding reams of
Streaming ideas clash swirl ever deeper raw thinking plunges ever deeper in the place of wonder it all
Swells and with just the right time that it takes to birth completeness human understanding ascends
Against formidable odds expression pours forth in a torrent are we not the sum total of what we think
Then let us mine the extreme the conscious active world can only raise to the level we appropriate in
Private study no great accomplishments have ever come in any other way not all are all called to lead a
Nation or pursue medical breakthroughs but our lives are privileged it’s not find the lowest level and
Sink down no it is speculate about the stars lift yourself to unknown heights in this accessible quest
You jettison limitations you get a foretaste of glory the hidden future hints at thrills yet to be unveiled
As one awaking from deep sleep you will know invigoration possibilities are at the end of favorable
Questions that are asked if you squander in lazy unstructured thinking then you pass sentence on your
Self and your life will be captured in mediocrity the idea is constantly be one who reassesses each
Situation maybe there is a better way the pillars of society rest on the tried and true but not before
They are tested why build inferior structures you want your work your life to inspire leave others
Wondering how they did it this can only be after you have fought indifference much is won by just
Committing to the lengths that it will take not how can I find a short cut that will prove to be
Disheartening from that point your actions will conform to less and the first inroads to weakness
And small living takes over you will hear yourself say if only I wish I had done it differently you have one
Life invest it wisely it will be your legacy to all at a vital turn maybe your life will quicken someone else
When they rethink your life avoiding disaster for them

Recovering from intensive
Effective breakthroughs proven
I’ve just drowned.

Rising urge
of looking outside.
The window
almost wants me to draw near
and the full morning light
comes right in.
No good reasons for,
that knocks me inside
like my own thoughts,
fluttering and spinning around
In search of ease
and breakthroughs.

So much room
for the spring to leak on me
seeping in, through
the sheer white curtains
I would pull back,
cause where I can see you
any clear vision is so rare.
Not just in my head
new lifetimes call
for the great unknown
to get me outside.
Rising urge...
ever since you.

Although I may be weak and weary at times,
You gird my spirit with an inner strength.
When reaching out to You in earnest prayer,
I’ll always be within Your arm’s length.

Please continue to enlighten me with truth,
so I may better appreciate these victories
that increase around my life, day after day -
which are the result of communing with Thee.

By my words, Godly deeds and humble prayers,
I purpose to release my commitment unto You,
knowing that I’m promised Your blessings
and coming are these divine breakthroughs.

O my Lord, thank You for empowering me!
By faith, I claim my spiritual inheritance.
As a child of yours, nothing can stand against me
and I will rise above all, earthly circumstances.


Author Notes:

Loosely based on:
1 John 4:4

Learn more about me and my poetry at:
http://www.squidoo.com/book-isbn-1419650513

By Joseph J. Breunig 3rd, © 2012, All rights reserved.

Lord, I thank You for Your goodness to us
You are never failing
Your works are perfectly knitted by Your loving hands
I thank You for breathing life to our Cj,
You wonderfully showed us Your goodness through his life
Your grace flows in his life and we are truly blessed
I pray, Lord, that You will always hold him in Your hands
I pray that You will not lose sight of him,
Guide him, Lord, in every step of his journey and
be it always with You, always by Your side
Bless his heart, Lord Jesus, may he grow more deeply in love with you before anyone and anything else
Bless his mind, Lord Jesus, may he always find peace and wisdom  in Your promises
Bless his life, Lord Jesus, may he continue to be a channel of blessings to all of us for more and more years,
Bless him to prosper, Lord Jesus, may Your plans be the blueprint of his breakthroughs this 2021
Bless him to have a good health, Lord Jesus, may You heal every area of his life that needs healing
Bless him in his career, Lord Jesus, I pray that You will be the One to increase his skills, knowledge and abilities in order to accomplish more breakthroughs
Bless his heart, Lord Jesus, to always stay humble before You
Bless his heart, Lord Jesus, that he may be still when challenges of life are testing him
Bless his heart, Lord Jesus, give him the power and strength to overcome more mountains with faith
Bless his heart, Lord Jesus, may he remember Your goodness and grace all the time, especially in the hardest times of his life
I pray that You will send him comfort when no one is able,
I pray that You will hear him out when no one is there to listen,
I pray that You may give the desires of his heart
I pray that Your will be done in his life
and lastly Lord, I pray that I may be able to take good care of him, help me to love him right, to love him like how you love us.
We believe in Your mighty power, Lord
We believe in Your desire to hear Your children's prayer
We worship Your beautiful Name, Lord Jesus.
In Your Name, Lord Jesus, we trust and we claim victories and answered prayers,

Amen.

Though Today’s path is uncharted,
I’m not worried; being led by Love,
shows that my trust is in the One,
Who wanted a relationship started

with me, before I actually knew
Him and the sacrifice He had made.
When I trust the plan and purpose
geared for my Life, breakthroughs

that I seek, will materialize by
the very seeds of Faith I possess;
with Him alone as my inner guide,
my soul will soar and divinely fly

as we journey together, each day;
I’m no longer concerned about being
lost or where I’m now headed, since
He lovingly accompanies me on my way.
.
.
.
Author notes

Inspired by:
Heb 11:8

Learn more about me and my poetry at:
http://amzn.to/1ffo9YZ

By Joseph J. Breunig 3rd, © 2016, All rights reserved.

feeling burdened—it tends to happen
particularly when meddling impressions run rampant
swarm circles in my hefty head, ignore the next exit ramp, and
let devils' advocates covet the cove i donned my dome once upon never

although i know this may be chalked up to intelligence
and subsequent ignorant claims that swear it's heaven sent
i swear it’s not for me. so tell all the hell-bent docents to leave
and let live my cognizance dim—to do what i can’t. to let it be.

it is what it is
and what it is
is it’s
excessive

i don’t need no informants
playing mentee won’t mend me
i’m torn sufficiently
far as i can see, it seems

don’t mentor she who beseeches
by way of screams and screeches
me and my strings are beat
by ****** and needless needles’
stitches and ventures heedless

i’m piecing my torn fabric
it’s grown so thick
it’s a feat, recognition
when simple addition alters
fact into fabrication

like my elation
in inebriation
guards sorrow
from knocking at my door
knocks my guard down
and has me floored

it hits my inhibition too
and i’m home-free
no guilt signaling
and i pull singles
i switch with tickets
i use to ticket my skin

no appointment
nor disappointment
walking in walk-in clinics
and sketchy shops
flickering the light
it sheds on both
my faces. i can face them
only with this double vision

i watch mark
as his sketches mark me
like stretch marks,
remarkably

in hopes of realizing on the double
the vision i envision into reality
he lets me let him put his hands on me
seemingly steadily
and we feel as our arms stretch

he draws me in
fills me ink
and vibrant me pends
his vibrating steel
and sharp pens
as they liven
my limp existence
reincarnating me instantly  

after sweet sleep
i wake bitter for some reason
feel dull but also sharp-ied
peeping the nonsense i let seep steeply
into my skin last night when i was peaking

now i can reminisce
on the pain of squirming
wallow over it instead, and
not the overflown gore of streams

and catastrophic waterfalls
that break through my largest *****'s walls
they leave what makes me, me,
with breakthroughs of which it can only dream

if only i can fall like the tears asleep
that crash and wave and overshadow my role
in turn leaving without desire
to turn over no stone
nor use any for stepping on
like the ones more close to normal
do coax

i do it all wrong
like they did me
i walk on coal
though from here
it appears
as though i'm an anomaly
only my sole seethes

when on the rocks
my walker, he makes me so strong
he lets me drink him from dusk to dawn  
he says he’d **** for me from here on
i love how foreign i am to him like heron

not the bird though it’s true
us three often see hues blue
we soar blue skies when our hearts fume blue
and they feel too sore like brews do
when they're too soft to heal each bruise or
make room for pain to grow and strength to bloom
so i walk on water as walker

kills me
he’s to die for
imploring in notes low
that i not stop, so i hop on
and once it’s well thought over
he can tell
overthinking’s my problem

i stand alone in the corner,
my core knows
all my o’s and woes
can be all gone
once one o centerfolds corner
and in comes the
coroner

who walks and rear-ends me
and e-r lose hope and leave me
when he cores me from his soul
and i let my breath roam

but he sends me
soaring over the moon
soon as he shows how he listens
and soon we both know
blinding luminescence

my eyes when they glisten
make all my mourning go missing
like the overthinking overkill
i hit when morning rays missile

and he curtails them at curtains
blacker than the blacklist
my man drenched
my nemesis in
deep sleep
with the fishes  

eventually, however
again and against my will, i endeavor
on reading the biography i penned
block my own writing
and let writers block lock me in
i get stuck on the same page
thought no force impedes
the power i home in my palms
nor my thumb's ability to thumb
through the page
yet i somehow flip it
and become my own victim

i did it.
it tells the history of tears
now extinct due to me overbearing
leading to drainage that came as
the very last bead beat me
for forbidding fibs
and calling dibs on *******

still, ringing in my ears
leaks empathy
for crocodile tears
trickling
as they salivate
over their next meal,
me

i swallow my tongue
not realizing fully
i’d just had my last meal
because they consumed me
quietly
with quibbles
and plots of consuming me
openly

ignorance is less so whats lacks
and with no inkling of doubt
worse in terms of that
which the mind keeps
then refuses to release
when need be
hence: me

after i head over
obvious traps
i let flash
atop my head

like clouds overcast
i’m convinced i tripped
on my own heels
like thunder that strikes
one man down twice
out of spite

but in spite
of everything, now that i know,
my eyes and i are drained no more
see, we’ve ever since grown more so
and metamorphosed
beyond words morbid

like those i anticipate
my gravestone
will go on
to hold

this is the reality of being kept cold-cut as meat
that heads *******, idiots, dunces, cons, and so on
those who bring forth obstacles that spurt in growth
inch by inch quicker than their thickening skulls

each time
the sage i pick thinks
my life needs spicing up, either
my screams of agony are mistaken
and my inseams nipped at the bud

or my spirits appear uplifted
and mistaken are my sorrow-filled tears
with joy-plagued wails,
each time
deep-seated sage seeds **** my green

lord knows that while i understand—to some degree
the world can’t come close or know what brews
in the disorganized chaos that is me intrinsically
i don’t fib when i allege that my angle isn’t deceit

nor right, necessarily
just dense as these
basins, wrinkles and dents
my tense cortex insists on heaving  

it would be obtuse of me
to anticipate that anybody
would watch my back
if not mine and me

it's all only a tactic
and i may feign obliviousness
to support this spinelessness
and keep it all in tact

insects fester
i feel each tentacle
extend incessantly
like these rants

they all ax my lumbar
no one's barred from my club
lumberjacks and jack’s slumber
i only lust after the latter

and jack's not all bad
he’s why my caps rested
soon as he hands it to me,
expressing the extent to which

i impress him
granted
my hands-off approach
that manages
to get hard jobs done
better than jills before

he’s a mild nuisance
when one of us isn’t speaking
but he promotes my irritability
with his attempts at weaving
our fingers together

it offends me
and all i long for
is knocking him out
like him and my neck's heart

or my kneecaps’ kneepads
the cap that’s my hat
can at last roll fast,
though no one should ask

i can’t say if i’m ok
jack ko’d my voice box
and i feel highjacked
but i insist, they insist
on the charm of the third

one i get him
like the lights, off,
that’s when i go on to hop off
tip toe off his tip top to get off
on the silence my mind writes off

none of it matters to me
mankind ramps up my love for luxury
the ivory warmth Mr. Browns rain
all over my cold windshield
puts me where i love to be

without them,
antidepressants
would depress and hail on
but their chocolate depressants
elevate me and i hail mary
when they hail hope on me
and i'm newly merry

when it’s all over,
i seek refuge and rush down
and on to the one and only John
where rest can be found
he’s bold as kohl and cold
as his marble floors call for

it's he who keeps my thoughts snowed in
and spares my teeth cracks no dentures can fix
suppresses my urge to purge like Snowden honing in
on how not one man cares less for one careless node in
systems nor the cancerous danger of no protests nor dents

it’s tasteless, the rice that is humanity
so i dine solitarily
in solemn grief
seeing the uselessness we
as crumbs and morsels have come to be

individuals in division
invincible in coalescence
bound to form solid solidarity
likely as the moment

satan and saint agree
to raise their satin
black and white flags,
respectively

to enwrap
two into
one
fabric. silky, smooth, seamless
as is the cocoon
          i once was foolish enough to assume
    would secure the very same wholesome skin
                         it would later go on
to help me consume.

cannibalism.

9-1-1, What is your emergency?
I seemed to have lost my sense of urgency.
I froze.
Which is funny, because undoubtedly
You used to be the one cold as ice.
I sat there.
My thoughts hovered around my mouth
But lacked any sort of volume,
Thus remaining a mystery to the operator.
I needed help though.
And usually I turned to you in these situations
But since you fled the scene
Fearing the certainty of an imaginary apology
I turned to the only logical choice left in my semi-delusional brain.
I've been attacked, please help me*
I finally mustered up the energy to form
Sounds similar enough to that phrase.
Just enough so this woman could send me
Someone with the proper credentials and
Experience for such bizarre circumstances.
The policemen arrived.
They investigated the scene.
Doing their due diligence while I laid motionless on the pavement.
They looked for clues.
Studied for anything that could lead them to you.
I guess my words weren't grounded in truth.
And although I knew only one suspect remained at-large
They carried on with no substantial leads or possible breakthroughs.
The only arrest that occurred
Was the false imprisonment of my heart in yours.
There was no bail set and parole will likely be denied.
What a deadly criminal at large.