I stalk success with greed
I think i'm high on ****.
An apparent aggression.
No room for depression.

No time to rest.
To success, i,m a pest..
i follow her everywhere..
I'm not a victim of fear.

Success is so proud;
a fact without a doubt.
still i pursue with pride.
my emotions, i cannot hide.

strength apparently spent.
still, i'll never relent.
i will chase your vagour..
adrenaline absolutely pours.

i'm a man with purpose;
a victim of an overdose.
i'm drowned in optimism..
i slay every subjective criticism.

Please,
Turn off the music.
It is pathetic,
Stupid,
Useless,
Overly-sensitive,
Victim music.

I don't know how I feel towards you anymore. I almost feel like I can hate you like you hate me, but something scratches at me, a million people tearing at my insides.
The naive highschooler, the little "man", the lustful *******, the vengeful ******* in me now, and the one that wishes you could just be okay.

I can't ******* figure out which one is me, was me. What I want for you, from you, or why it even matters..

I want to be sorry, I am sorry, but the vengeful ******* still screams ****** ****** in my head.
"It was all *******, she wants to believe she's any better when she used you. She wants to judge and not be judged. Blame you for everything she hates in herself."

I try to drown him out with noise, music, love.
But I can't stop the nagging that you were selfish, and even more so, you were entitled.
You've always been everything you hate in me, and now more.
A victim that always denies herself love.

She said "I can practically taste the malice that fills your heart and the hatred in your soul. You would like nothing more than to see this world burn wouldn't you? I can see it in your eyes, that's the real you." She just might be right. The darkness within hums like a gentle rhythm I was but a victim of my humanity, those are memories I don't treasure but it's a measure of how far I've come. I'll take you by storm.... An uncontrollable maelstrom. No friend, no foes and anything goes in this game of mine, regardless of the time, my comeback remains certain.

If they don’t believe you
they don’t deserve to
be apart of your story.

You shouldn’t have to explain
yourself.

behind the castle walls,
behold a girl who's been hurt,
a girl who's been taunted,
a girl who's been broken into pieces,
a girl who's been tossed aside like nothing,
a girl who's been torn down.

behind the castle walls,
lays a ******* her mattress,
eyes trimmed with water,
as her gaze is fixated on her ceiling.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who doesn't understand love,
because she's numb to the feeling,
something that stings but no longer pains.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who's tired,
both emotionally and physically.

behind the castle walls,
is a girl who doesn't want to breathe any longer.
because even the shallowest breath,
burns like flames.

Let’s talk about my intuition
Talk about a brain that swells
I saw it coming to fruition
Easily for you I fell

Suspicions were a friend to you
Made me your toy; I would not tell
My nightmares and my dreams came true
Sequestered in your prison cell

Do all the ***** things you do
You’re Heaven and my private Hell
Just say one thing when I come to
And no more hear the ringing bells

Those words, please tell me, “I love you”
With earnestness, to me you sell
I don’t care if it isn’t true
You are my fix and I’m not well

So “dose” me up; I need to sooth
And fill this lost and empty shell
Drunk on your love; You are my *****
The cost of this I do not dwell

A choice I made yet did not choose
You instantly had cast your spell
Too blind; I did not see the ruse
An easy ‘mark’, no need to sell

Tried for a stew but made a soup
The drifted parts will never gel
No question, for sure I’ve been duped
I clearly hear the banging knell

Forever stuck within this loop
A never-ending carousel
You took my soul with one fell swoop
I said ‘hello’, you said ‘farewell’