Sketching scripture,
a seductive scrawl.
Fingers tracing,
receptory recall.
Tapering with time;
a melancholy erase.
Reminiscing your writing,
healing hieroglyphic efface.

When I think of
all the words you said...

the delicate whispers,
the wispy desires…

a genuine intensity
realizes it will
never let you go.

Yet, for now,
my body feels foreign,
because the simplest
tenderness I have yet to feel
is the pleasure of your
Touch.

I can feel your head in my lap,
your hand in my hair,
your lips on my cheek,
but it all feels wrong

like it's not you who's supposed to be there

It doesn't matter
That our eyes didn't meet
When we passed in the hall
That they sat somewhere else
While I looked straight ahead
And laughed too loud
With all their old friends

It doesn't matter
That we only talk when they want to
We flirt in careless circles
If you could even call it that
We hit a rough patch
I should leave you behind
For those that care who I really am

It doesn't matter
That I always end up
Close to crying
I ought to get you out of my mind
But you remembered my birthday
And the pronouns my friend told you
Why did I ruin this
Why did I ruin this

i lie awake at night
staring into the darkness
desperate to feel
the shadows of your touch
on my body once more

I want to show you
Just how much you mean to me
Want to say "you're perfect"
Although you don't agree

I have never been closer to heaven
True love my amazing escape
This life is rampant with suffering
Unsteady against your shape

I wish I expressed better
The love caught in my heart
Blind to my adoration
Emotions from the start

I am aware that I have caused you pain
It never was my intention
Wanted what was best for us
Not the tremendous resulting contravention

The only way to earn trust back fully
To make every decision based on you
The scars we've left on eachother
Fade into ones we never knew

I hope it is not too late to tell you
Sorry for all the heartache
Soul is incomplete without yours
Fall apart without your hand to take

Keep surprising me a zillion ways
Can't get better than this
Life with my best friend
One who gives my life purpose

That is all I need to be happy
Touch of your lips and your laughter
Conversations shared in the dark
You're simply my happy-ever-after

he told me something
once, fleeting
his lips pressed to my ear
whispered, softly,
a ghost
like the feeling of his hands
resting gently on my shoulders
swaying to the sound
of a song that ended long ago
touch and music and breath
and ghosts
but i still see them
and feel them
and hear them
hands and arms and shoulders
and lips and ears and teeth
and ghosts.