i will learn to taste the honeydew
and pretend to like it

i will taste the honeysuckle
and not have to pretend

i will feel grass in my hands and
say it is the best of life

and not the woman i need between my teeth

i am not ferocious, not demanding, not unwise,
simply at peace.

i am the sparkler to the firework
the star to the sun
the kitten to the lion.

but are these not all one and the same?

i see dandelion seeds and
though they are weeds i will
watch their dance anyway

i dive into agua dulce
wishing to be stardust instead of glitter
but glitter is certainly better than ash

under the water i have a moment to myself
where it
takes my screams into pockets of air
floating up without consequence

escaping my body at last in
a beautiful anonymity

may watchful eyes devour my body
unmarked, unblemished, devoid.

and they will watch as i make myself perfect

…but if the powdered sugar somehow melts off of my skin
i beg you to look away
for your sake and mine

my mother once told me
she didn't take me to a concert because there were lot of people
big crowd she said
big bad crowd
and I think of this now
mommy
then why did you gave birth to me in this cruel world
you threw me right into people's teeth
these sharp teeth
they tore me apart
you better not take me to a concert
ever

You make me want to kick you in the teeth
It may hurt me back but not my feelings.

The urge to snap your kneck
makes me shiver filled with rage.
I hate that I want you
but I know that I don't need you!

After trying everything,
it so bothers me
that you're still breathing.

The memories of you
Makes me want to puke!

Why the **** did we ever come across?
Wait, hold on to that thought
Knife is talking to me,
reminds me to slit your ******* throat!

Where does it hurt today?

My teeth/sinuses,
Sciatic nerve,
*****, perineum,
*******?

But not my heart
(no, no more my heart).