i stayed up all night
waiting for a text from you.
sunlight knocked on my bedroom window,
but i just shut it out once again...
i refuse to let anything other than u in

you know, i could never fall asleep properly until i heard from you...
so i guess you could say i haven’t gotten much sleep these past few months.
i have been staring at my ceiling for so long,
trying to picture us together again,
that i’ve nearly forgotten what the rest of the world looks like.

i never thought the day would come where my longing for you would bring me nothing but misery,
but here i am,
staring at my ceiling,
the sunlight is starting to creep in on me...
so i guess it’s time for me to close my blinds again.

Do I love you too much?
Am I supposed to feel this much?
Because every time I think your happiness might be
In the slightest way impeded or stopped,
My heart lies smitten, its beats off and tormented,
The muscle itself not knowing whether
It has enough strength to continue with
The next beat.  What is there to live for
If you are not happy?  
If tears fall down your face, who am I to smile?
If your mind is tormented by nightmares,
Who am I to lose myself in daydreams?
If you’re anxious about the world,
Who am I to enter it with confidence?
Because I truly love you, I have no choice
But to put your happiness over my own.
It feels as natural as that favorite shirt,
The perfect opening to a novel,
Sunlight streaming through the window on an unmade bed.  It feels so perfect, so right, that I can’t help
But shed tears when you do,
Experience terror during your nightmares,
To wallow in your uncertainty.  
Do I love you too much?  
Am I supposed to feel this much?  
Because I do.

Soft grey and gold
Thin flits
Of sunlight beams
Through
Dusty
Off white blinds
Like
Honey
Down your cheeks
Your neck,

Suspending every single whole and half thing
On this earth
In between
All the air

Be the ocean
Wild and free
Everchanging
And unrelenting

Be the storm
Calm at the center
A whirlwind
All around

Be the sun
Burning bright
Shining down
A source of Life

Be the night
Brilliant as the stars
But also the darkness
Helping them shine

Be the leaves
Flying away
At the whim of the breeze
Colors of the wind

Be brave
Be humble
Have courage
And Be kind

Be the changemaker
Be the change
You want
The world to be

Be whoever-
Whatever-
You want
To be

What a happy place to see.
The white beach and the blue sea.
Where you can relax and sing with glee.
It’s a perfect place to be.

Wake me up in this beautiful place.
Where the sun light hits my innocent face.
The sound of the wave plays like a music in my ears
And the salty air blows my hair and dries my tears.

what a strange sight to see,
sunlight streaming through windows;
the gentle touch of fiery radiance,
falling on silver pillars and plastic handles
draping over broken plastic seats
with the same ceremony and caress
inside a bus as it would in a chapel  

on this quiet journey homeward,
I have found peace