Every snowflake like a
                   chandelier hanging
from the ceiling of the heavens.
Light glistens from there cold
                                           glimmer.
Collecting on the sorrows of winters
barren collection on bleak visuals.

But when these chandeliers fall,
        enveloping all in a winters glow.
And for a few moments, everything
                              is in symmetry.
A masterpiece of indistinguishable beauty.

Dear Suicide,

Please wrap me up in your warmth,
breathe your breath into mine,
fill me with a love I can never forget.
Please take me away,
hold my sorrows.
I'll hold yours too.
But only as much as I can bare,
you are much stronger.
Please wrap me tighter til I suffocate in your love,
don't let me go.
I do not want life.
I want your death,
sweet soothing darkness.

Let me sleep, let me dream,
Don't wake me in just yet;
I'm not tired, just tired of life.
I'm happy in my courtship with the Brother of Death.
If I never awake, that's just fine.

Brother of Death, come pull my heartstrings,
Come pull the wool over my eyes.
Woo me to bed and your welcome embrace;
Be my escape from this life.

Let me remain in my comatose state;
If I'm unconscious, just let me slumber.
Awake, I'm too lonely to care anyway.
What good is life without a lover?

Man of Sorrows, come romance my heart.
Even in my dreams you haunt me.
If I can't escape Your awe-full embrace,
You might as well haunt me completely.

Don't let me remain in my comatose state.
Awaken me from my slumber.
Awake or asleep, there is no escape.
Life is just death when devoid of The Lover.

My heart is not made of stone!
I feel the piercing pain
Spending my time alone
Walking in this heavy rain

The thunder roars rumble
But my mind has freezed
Upon a stone, I stumble
This time I am not teased

In my room, I sit wondering
What would hurt the most?
A betrayal of hearts pondering,
Or promises washed away and lost

I give leads to my sorrows
Letting my tears fall upon
Shall it be my last tomorrow
From everyones life gone

As I take in a half glass of wine
My tears fill in the other half
Every fault becomes solely mine
The rest sit back and laugh

My love went unnoticed first
And you gunned me with cheat
Betrayal came in with the rest
Your love showed in your treat

I shall go, far away from all
From your life to my pained soul
I know you'd never dare to call
The flames died, left is just, coal...


©sim

Remembering our dead
Mansions, or humble abodes
Virtues or deeds

Learned by heart
Nights of gladness
Morning sorrows

Stories as grains of sand
Forming eternal rocks
Or leaves from a tree
Shelters of hopes and dreams
  
Ocean waves drowning breath
Dreams crumbling as castles
Small homes becoming shrines
Images we choose, or not

Our great grands looking back
Thinking of us as we of ours
Long for memories to grow

Good grows as hands reach out
In time to lift, serve or destroy

Things break and lose charm
Those we feared and loved
Or guides found with sobs

Moments of shared delight
Human frailties, loss and pain
Keep us in want
Never enough, always too much

The hell of heaving
Infernos of inherited pride
Or careful purpose and deeds
Blessing those left

We follow their climb
When plotting our course
In darkness hides the light
Doors close in mind

Under a blanket of 
blackest wool
tiny darting stab wounds bleed 
yellow splinters through a night sky that borrowed it's blue from the bottom of the sea.
-In the up there.
       -In the out there.
And on our wooden chairs painted crisp bay white
chipped over the years,
so the layers of paint becomes a calendar -
we sit to watch
63 moons glide gracefully,
circle daintily-
We strain our necks and whisper tightly
say the things
that move from tongues to fingertips.
Wild gestures meant to
land sooner than the bitter words.
Under the nebulae where you once
gave me a ring
which you slung round a planet
with a ladder and rope.
And you gave me a promise that's still hung round the sun
so I jump up ride it when it orbits me close.
and I'll hide in its caves when the fear-dollies chase me-
and I'll dip in the tides of bubbling foam.
In a moment of tiny,
                              of small
                                            and of sooner....
                             in a moment that's billions of miles away
so before we've been born
and before we've been lovers-
a star somewhere tucked our whole story away.
I'll find us a night cloud
thick with our longings
I'll puff up it's feathers and send it to sea.
I'll send out a hope seed
to sell to the watchmen,
only to free it when they've gone to sleep.
Yes, I'll pack it up safely and keep it's core glowing
(for hope is a thing that you never keep kept.  )
As we sit in our garden,
and we touch close our fingers
As our babies are children and those children now men.
The night scented orchid blooms urgent around us,
like small fragrant fairies that scattered below.
The 64th moon has given you passage,
she's waiting impatient, I fear you must go.
Don't look for me, darling, for I will be waiting
on the bench in the garden
where the night flowers bloom.



Sahn 5/2/15  
Thanks as always.

The stones I choose were
smooth and grey
to build a cairn
that marked the end.
So cold were they
I thought them wet
Laden with my dark regret.
As for all I could not keep,
I placed them gently, buried deep .
Frigid I
I could not thaw-
The fault was mine,
in the after all.

Sahn
01/15/17

I am not Atlas.
I can’t carry the weight the world on my back,
Watching from below as
symphonies become sorrows
And hopes become hopeless.
As hearts stop beating despite the flowing
Of blood through the veins along scarred wrists.
And bones fracture after words stab into
Discarded bodies with lifeless heads.
And maybe Atlas didn’t have this problem.
Maybe Atlas could bend his knees,
Perhaps they were sculpted to shift that way
But, even if I wished upon the brightest star
My knees would not bend at the hands of chaos.

Once upon a time we had the hymnal propped by the kitchen sink so's I could learn; years later Mum would sing along with me, and now...I like never but once in a blue moon dare to sing aloud, for missing her to tears.



(sonnet #MMMMMMCCXLVII)


What's happened to--me?  Rainy hours detail
Thet eye with silver's touch while green lawns fence
The minutes fog obscures by vague suspense
With softest carpets rolled out to avail,
And I'm not erm, my own in sheer betrayl;
Erst naked trees lost to mists' whitish sense
Of yonder, I could shiver, and do hence,
Cuz in a blink I'm his upon that scale.
One comment like my wont five days ere, poor
As what?  now he distracts aught hours 'til through
Suggestion I am giggling, sober, tour
His deepest sorrows, and maunt say he'd woo?!
Of course, I'm better searching violets, fer
All that.  Let purple wink low, saying we knew.

05Apr17b