I want to
see you
Hold you
Touch you
Kiss you
Love you
Sleep beside you
Wake with you
Feed you soft mango
Taste mango on your sweet lips
Love you more
Be with you forever
Die in your arms

what a smile
a splendid grin
lovely eyes
letting light in
a laugh
like butterflies
flying
from an airborne stone.
a touch
like warm snow
a blanket
to move and mold
a voice
like blooming dahlias
hair
soft and curled
arms
to fold around me
comfort
and joy
in your embrace
love
is all the more sweeter
with you

Look at the tree
Such soft bark, those hard leaves

It has no place for me to see
Just fuzzied lines in a dappled breeze.

i think
your neck
is a delicacy
soft
smooth
bitter
and sweet.

his cheeks were rose petals
soft and pink

his eyes were the sky
velvety blue

his smile was a disease
contagious and heart-stopping

his laugh was song
i want to hear over and over again

his touch was fire
warm and colorful

his lips were candy
sweet and soft

for now I will keep my little papers
because they bring me joy
but one day I'll chop myself up like a piece of clay
grey and soft and firm
to a small blank surface
ready to mold
ready to begin a new road
cross my fingers
not to sicken
cross my heart
not to remorse
mourn my memories that leave me still
but break from this proper cycle
fill my trashcan full of papers
that soon will empty
by then, there will be nothing
I could hope to do
my treasures are fleeting
and I, for once, will be new

hi i'm zee. i'm 17 years old as of the moment i'm writing this to you.
i have met numerous boys until i met you. used them as substitutes as to what it would feel like to be finally with you.
i hate feeling like a burden so i tend to bottle up my feelings and sometimes i eventually explode.
i like the rain. i like how nature reminds me that it's normal to feel sad and to cry.
i like sunsets more than i like the sunrises. i like how the sun setting tells me that even the most important things in life get tired and
needs rest so i should too.

i'm unsure about what i like. but i'm pretty sure about you.
i have nights where i question myself what's taking you so long to finally get to me? are you even coming?
--- i have thought about giving up in love and how i don't need it. how i can live without you.
i haven't met you but god, you're always in my mind.

i'm needy, remind me everyday why you chose me. remind me that you love me because i am unsure if you do.
i have nights where i imagined you holding me, so when you do get to hold me please never let go.

i hope you'll never let me go, never let me write another letter like this.

i have incredibly bad writer's block i could go on months of not writing anything
but i can never continue my day without saying a word to you.

hi i'm zee, again. i'm not sure how old i am now that you finally get to read this.
i don't know if i'm still all the things i wrote. but i'm still sure of you.

halo, halo
flooded by musky greens
that wipe out the bitterness
to your taste
hands tight on my waste
and lifting me
to sit on a shredded pillow
the window open
the walls damp
the chill once again comforts me
embracing an icy touch
you cut my hair
a head of bleach falls to the floor
my black roots remain
fragile breaths come from the trees
awakening once more
creeping their branches into the room
creeping under my tunic
the sky clears and I am soft
the pillow empties of its feathers
removing the inside
releasing the weight