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As I picked you up by the thorn, our love was bound for scarring. These ****** tattoo my skin, shades of black and grey--forever we are.
A Aug 2020
I don't exactly know who needed this today
But the trauma that you carry doesn't ever go away
In fact there's more, just wait
We're not all built the same
It's absolutely fascinating just how far that you have made it
Still too young to be enduring all this pain and scarring
Truly I am sorry & I do apologize for all the pictures in your head
I know the flashbacks make you mad
And nightmares seem real bad
Sometimes of sleeping you're still scared
But no, you're not better off dead
There's no getting over it, get through it instead
Start coping healthier, keep going forward
You're only still here cause you're strong enough
You're the survivor
Tell your stories with pride
Always keep your head held high
Be ambitious in a world that is so vicious
Blue Jay Feb 2019
I only use permanent pain as a replacement of the temporary one
Because I know myself.
How I love to see the good in everyone
And I know how easily I forgive and forget
How easy it is to be swayed by your lies and goodbyes
And how I always seem to become a bet
How easily you can play with my heart rather then my hair
How much you're always right and your judgment becomes my air
The air I breathe and need so badly or I heave
At least the permanent pain will be a reminder to do everything to leave
Even when you paint a beautiful brand new start..
To not fall to the old, cruel, lonely habits of my heart.
1/4/17
9:55pm
Louise Joyce Jul 2018
What is blood's belonging,
When we just cut its supply,
Ending our stream,
Ending our lives,
Lives filled with misery,
Disturbed in despair,
Life is filled with obstacles,
Though everything is fair,
As fair as her skin,
In the sunny skies
Though if you look closer,
If you look at her thighs,
Under the trousers,
As dark as her mind,
Scars dancing,
Upon the streaks of a line,
So what is blood's belonging,
If we just cut its supply,
Ask the girl,
Who drew on her thighs.
Thighs Self-harm Scarring Drawing Razorblade Blood Bloodstream
Thomas King Dec 2017
Sleepless nights full of regret
For holding it all in
Waiting for the erosion
Of my mind to begin

My soul wanders aimless
Blind, lost and weak
A beautiful future
Now dark, lonely and bleak

Where do I look for courage
To find my voice
Is it too late?
Do I still have a choice?

Am I destined to be silent?
Nothing more than a mute
Unable to express
And emotionally irresolute

So now I just sit
In a dark corner and sigh
Looking for answers
To the how, when and whys

I hope the answers come soon
On why I don’t speak
Why I can’t express what I feel
And why I feel lonely and weak

Until I find the answers
I’ll just continue to cut
But I will hide my arms well
So nobody sees and thinks I’m a nut.
S R Mats Mar 2015
Are words harmless?  Can they ever be benign?
Between you and I?-

And, how many times has the Soul mated and re-mated?
Tearing, scarring, and numbing the connection.

Is that how and why, we keep this distance?
Or, Love, is it fear of perfection?
I cut my heart into stanzas and tainted fragments with your name
Written on skin with shaking hands disconnected and insane
But I found it weak and fleeting; washed your ashes down the drain
Developed bruises where I’d scrawled so hard it hurt — but I liked it.

Disillusioned and dysfunctional she murmured, “Have you loved before?”
I was thinking, yes, but gasped out, “no,” so she wouldn’t worry more
What she might have felt settled in me; I shook, unhinged indefinitely
Had you held my heart?  Or did you break it from a distance?

I’ve given up on order.  It’s just subdued the chaos.
I’ve given up on life, but I’ve stayed here all the same.
He asked me if I wished to die — so I said, “Yes, but that’s not why.”
I’d done it so he’d notice; I’d done it so he’d care.

Quite obscure and rough, I think, but I’ll teach you to love it
Sometimes less is more, y’know — sometimes I’m tired of it
Simple words can break you down like simple blades you’ve lost and found
That missed the mark and fell apart to leave a scar above it.
Allison Lynn Feb 2014
I either care too much
Or I don't care enough
It's like I'm playing a never ending
Tug of war against myself
Too much pushing and pulling
Wondering and waiting
Is it worth the time
Or am I going insane yet?
And even after taking steps back
To see things more clearly
My perspective remains the same
And the image is blurry
I can't decide what's right
And I'm running out of time
To finally make up
My ever changing mind

Drop the mask and façade
I need to see the truth
What is actually there?
What is actually you?
And what have you done
To try to make me stay
Even when it seems
Like I'm pushing you away
I miss the way it used to be
When you actually tried
Now I'm falling for you harder
And I'm scarring my pride
But what is actually hurt
Isn't the fact that you're fading
But the fact that I was wrong
When I thought I could change it

And maybe after this
I'll finally learn
How to point out the liars
Before I get hurt
But mistakes are inevitable
Even for me
I'm not the perfect person
I wish I could be
But I'll remember the past
When I'm living every day
I won't let people trick me
Won't listen when they say
That they can give me the world
But they have their fingers crossed
Because I can't lose my head
Or ever get lost
For the fear of unreturned love
Is something to hate
Because it's bound to happen sometime
Despite your effort to delay it

And well the seasons change
And memories fade
But the lesson will always
Remain the same
You'll have to face lies
Disappointment and heartbreak
But hold onto yourself
It's the only thing you'll take
Because most everything eventually
Crumbles and falls
But if you're still there
Standing up tall
You'll be able to start over
Get a fresh start
To reopen the wounds
You've sealed on your heart

— The End —