and now that cold, heavy blanket i've been trapped under for so long,
gets a little bit lighter, and i can finally feel the sun

it hasn't always been this light, mind you
i just haven't always been this strong

yeah,i was feeling like hell
on the path of my confused mind.
I wanted to scream my whole heart out
but clenched my fists try not to do,
as i was not permitted.  
and that feels like i was burning inside,
which was enough to frightened me
as I'd nobody by my side.
My grey eyes were fiery ,
the apprehension which i wanna share,
but now i am apprised of these things
that no one is gonna care.
After days months and years of chaos and
life-threatening situation
people stabbed me for no good reason.
I'd somehow managed to find a way to be happy
because i realized no one will come,
riding on black horse to save me or take my all worries.
I have to save myself, little by little, day by day
and I’m learning to breathe deep through it ,
and keep walking with a high head
and plastered a smile on my lips.                          
  -samra

i stay up late
having conversations with the walls
and screaming your name
at the mirror
               what if i can’t get up today?
i have sleep paralysis
from overthinking our conversations
from last week
until today
              what if i don’t want to fight?
the monsters under my bed
have pulled out my memory box
and have thrown it around my room
for their own amusement
            what if the sun doesn’t shine today?
that’s okay,
it’s only monday
you still have the rest of the week
to recover
take it easy, you’ll be okay

“babe you’re so fragile”

I know am

sharp edges
and pointed parts
might shatter me

and I’ll still crash myself more
to avoid me from dragging you too

but you’ll have me
wrapped around your warm arms
whispering me that
“everything’s gonna be alright”


— time can’t heal,
your existence recovers.

Where better to find a leaf
than in the forest?
Where better to eat food
than at a table?
Where better to pray
than in a church?
Where better to scream
than by yourself?
Where better to hurt
than inside yourself?

No place better than a hospital
to recover
Where better to die
than in the arms of your lover?

i did lines
not just of poetry
it’s the thing that binds
me to myself