Sometimes I feel the darkness
as it draws itself yet oh so near.
Shrouds of blackest pitch,
Like a shiver of the spine,
caused by a scream I feel but do not hear.

All pervasive gloom
that shrouds my world to never ending black.
Dragging down both soul and sense,
Like a craven remorseless killer
intent on demonic inhuman attack.

I feel it in my body and I sense it
as it encroaches on my mind.
Taking both warmth and light,
Leaving never ending blackness,
devoid of hope of any kind.

At times the will to fight
has been totally taken away.
Rational mind and tired limbs,
Made to give up all reason
to stand and fight for one more day.

I sense an endless wave that drowns me
in utter dark despair.
Kicking through all defence,
Until all will to live yet one more moment,
evaporates into thin air.

The fight is ever daily
and the waves they come and go.
Random depths to which I fall,
How I survive amidst the darkest waves,
I really do not know.

In days gone by the waves have compelled me
to physically react.
More than one failed attempt,
Still I yet remain by fluke,
compounded by the lessons that I lacked.

I know that I have learned
and can push all normal fears aside.
In life we learn from failures,
And it is chance and not hope,
keeps me safe where I now hide.

Pages turn,
chapters end,
books are finished.
With resolution, and head
held high, I'll
fly away to somewhere
safer, where there's
less pain.
I try to love you,
but you just
push me away.
The heart is a
silly dreamer.
It sees life as it
should be...could be,
and not as it
really is.
The head sees what
the heart doesn't.
Emotions can be as
treacherous as a
rabid dog or a
razor blade.
I wish I were a
redwood or a rosebush,
or even a dandelion
just
swaying in the
breeze.

Circle the letter of one best answer to each question.

Which one is better?
A. Deeply insecure
B. Extremely over-confident

a wise eyed cynic
head full of rational thought
ignored by his only friend

as i descend into madness,
will you be my Horatio?
standing through it all
with the utmost clarity?

Oh, to be Horatio
as your closest friends are dragged into the clutches of insanity

A confident man feels not a need to speak
on all things with which he does not agree
Though in the proper time and place
he is not afraid to assert his way

And though his words at times cause spurn,
he will admit when they are out of turn
Fearing not the inevitable mistake,
but rather owning it too late

Caring and feeling without hesitation
and not for reciprocal adulation
Emotions are expressed appropriately;
either subtlety or rationally

As honest with others as with himself;
recognizing what he does and doesn’t do well
Claiming to know what he does know
and asks when he don’t

Pursuing tasks for their benefit and or joy
rather than status or fleeting ploys
Those latter things are often great fun,
but worry of them yields none

While in his mind there is good thinking,
he is more occupied with good acting
In order to have concerns of the ideological,
requires labors that are practical

On his confidence, he does not ponder,
as neither he or anyone wonders
of whether he truly possesses it.
We know it.

(F)or all the
t(o)ugh times
that (c)alled
for (u)ltimate
(s)trength...
remember
them..

Mouth dry, tongue tied,
So much to say.
Last night, I tried-
Knelt down to pray.

Morning came too soon,
Truth through my window.
I know I'm the moon-
Diminuendo.

Happiness is naive.
All just-for-fun designs.
The pain we keep to grieve-
Vanity of the mind.

We swing from metal framework,
Deep in our beliefs, we fight.
In our dreams, we twitch and ****-
Repeating the phrase, "I'm right".

I'm right, I'm right, I'm right, I write,
And God has told me just as much.
I write, I write, I write, "I'm right?"
Gems overflowing from my clutch.

Now I stop to think- shame has made me.
Is it worth bowing to retrieve gold?
I recall when all I sought was glee.
When did life impose this stranglehold?

Everything I know's been built by unknown.
Thought I could make the best of this in time.
I sit here, a clown, laughing at my throne-
It was all I could do to craft a rhyme.

Gun shy, outside,
Nothing to say.
Headlight, eyes wide-
No reason to stay.