i realized i missed the wind
the moment the cold hit my lips

i've been fantasizing nightly
about head against chest
heartbeats keeping time with
the chirping of cicadas outside

i'm not used to missing hipbones
and legs intertwined
and a hand behind my knee

but as far as you're concerned

my weight in your lap,
one hand in my hair
and the other on my hip

very close
(i miss being very close)
your exhale and my inhale
and vice versa
i crave close

i don't know who i am anymore

Imagine

With faith, You said,
You could help to
Address the problem

On getting colder
You have to write
Note on sudden death

Who is to blame?
Sins of ancient rites?
The last breath?

Behind the Bars
All shouting at you
All pointing at you

Love is like a rose?
I would have to disagree,
What of endless love?
For him, and him for she?

Too soon roses die,
Wilt, wither, and fade away,
True unceasing love despite
The climate will stay.

What of thorns, danger near?
Love rises up and conquers all,
While petals slowly drift to the ground
One by one quietly fall.

Petty roses cannot compare,
To beauty of two hearts
No matter how far away
Never stop beating or grow apart.

Soft red color is dull in comparison
To a lover's sheepish blush
Jumping out against pale skin,
Vivid, vital, vibrant blood-rush.

If love is like a rose
A pathetic world this be,
Flowers don't stand a chance
When put to shame by we.

I'm guilty
I'm always guilty
it bugs me, won't leave me alone
"you're filthy, empty
only filled with things you collected
over there, in anothers life
you're all things neglected
hell, you're not worth the dive"

Shut up! Just be quiet.
Only once. Give me some bliss.
I am the one who decided
I'm fine with how it is.
Why can't you be my ally instead?
What is driving you so mad?

Yes, I feel pathetic.
Are you happy now?
Won't we make this sound more poetic?
The least we can do is put on a show.
Is this all I can do?
Always fighting this stupid me and you

I'm happy, can't you see?
My eyes cry out to make you believe.
I'm happy, I'm happy, I'm happy,
why don't you let me be?
A little bit futile,
in the eyes of my own judge
Quite a bit volatile,
and how it still all feels like a little bit too much

I know what I'm supposed to do
I know no stranger should feel like hope
I know I alone need to come through
I know there's no red rope
nothing that ties my floating pieces together
scattered for far too long,
underneath a bright and broken moon, forever
singing some beautiful and lonely song

Realization,
I recognize.
Acceptance,
I understand.
But I can't be changed.
I won't ever be changed.
Always feel estranged,
countless thoughts deranged
in the picture you see, so beautifully arranged.