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pn Mar 2021
you leave.
i wake up and you're gone.
you leave like how your kisses fade away on my clavicle.
you leave like the roses that slowly waste from june to
september.
you leave like you can't wait to.
you leave like there's nothing better in the world.
Nick Stiltner Mar 2021
When is when is when is
The next moment I will stand on this shore, looking out into the bay?
Who will I be and how will I see this same scene then?

How will I see again, the morning rising illuminating the tide, it’s misted glow refracting in all directions?

How will I hear again, the gull’s cry, a higher song hovering over the soft sway of the water, it’s lapping connection to the shore, gone now but always on its reverberating journey back?

How will the water feel on my feet, in early spring and then in ebbing twilight? Will I stand strong and blooming, or will I hunch and wither in decay, in memories of a long forgotten brighter day?

Will the salt spray still fill my nose, will its memory be etched in me always?

There is no sure way to know, no sure path we can follow, I say to myself.
When I return I will be him and he will have came from me, formed in the bubbling foam of my memories of this swaying sea.
But in my melancholy daze upon departure,
a vision appears to me as if a dream:

“Be gone!”
A mirage of the goddess Brizo comes to me, sitting alone in a galley bobbing along with the waves.
“Be gone! Hold not your journey in contempt, be scared not of the changing tides!
You have your vessel as I have mine, the sea is strong but not impassible!
Adjust your sails, redirect your mind, the wisdom of the sea follows, to any height you can climb!
The power is you, shed light on what you know to be true, look in the water and be calmed, know that you are you!

Be gone! Go from me, away from this fading part of your journey,
There is still much of the world to see!
Do not linger, do not hesitate,
Do not be contented, with a hazy view of the sea from your seat on the shore!”
Dawn Treader Mar 2021
Those words spoken long ago
I choked them down dry and raw
Now I find regurgitation
To be the only way
In avoiding asphyxiation
Belief is one thing
Reality another
A monster when combined
Some call it "Love"
Some call it a "Lie"
Delusion is jelly-thick
You know what tastes nice?
Reclusion.
I poisoned myself on hope and seclusion
Love, may you gag on my rotting flesh
My eyes have opened
My mouth agape
Choked out from love's embrace
My feelings on a long complicated relationship that has left me feeling so many emotions I thought I had pushed far away.
Jonas Feb 2021
So you're going then?
Yes I'm leaving
... me behind, again.
For some time, I'm coming back .... I think
Why are you doing this? What are you looking for?
Experience, Purpose, Answers, Determination
 Love, Life, Death,
Memories of the future
and whatever all of that summs up to

It hurts to see you go.
I know,but you know what?
...
It means it has been real
It means it has been worth it
;
Getting left hurts, please don't leave me behind
Stay clear of open windows
I'll be seeing you my old friend
Owen Feb 2021
It seems inevitable
that I break my own heart again
and again.
Each time it comes
for long sad smiles,
and embaces
prolonged.
Yet time and the world
are the stronger
and we fall apart.
And every touch lingers
upon my skin in memory.
Leaving only ever gets harder,
and I yearn to be free.
Mose Feb 2021
Tongue tied like shoelaces.
I don't need an explanation or proclamation.
Walk out the door without a second take.
Baby, don't you see?
How you leave is an art.
Ursula Wolf Feb 2021
Have you really touched me
With the shores of your ocean heart?
Was it real when my murdered love
Rose again in your intoxicated arms?
Your answer still haunts me
When you said,
you just want to be free.
Jamesb Feb 2021
In the dream (or perhaps it is forseeing) it is cold,
The air carries whispers of ice
That cut through the warmth of my skin
Like knives,
The quay is deserted,
Quiet aside from the occasional
Breeze induced moan from
A beer bottle tossed casually away
To lie discarded and thereby
A bit like me,

As I single up the mooring lines
Of the boat below me its movement
Becomes greater,
As if shunning the cold stillness
Of the land,
And seeing this I feel kinship
With the waking hull,
And a sense of shared impending journey
To the grey seas
Beyond the harbour wall,

As I work the halyards and
Aged sails creak up the mast
The breeze becomes more evident
In the brisk flapping of canvas,
Rime frost on the gunwhales gives way
To dark hand prints as I steady myself
Moving forward and aft,
Steadily prepping for departure
In a routine well known
Across decades,

Finally all is ready,
The wind picks up,
Sundering the clouds to reveal
A clear black sky studded in diamonds,
The navigation lights
From far galaxies come to light my way
As the backed foresail
Pushes the bows away,
Then with a creak the boom quells
The flapping main,

Approaching the harbour mouth
The wind rises further and a few
Long lazy yet driven rollers
Make their presence felt,
The heel increases as the bow tastes freedom,
Nav lights on the breakwater are
Unnaturally bright but no one sees
Nor waves goodbye,
Nor ever will again for tonight
I that was James just crossed the bar
This is a bit of a recurring theme. Hopefully someone somewhere will appreciate it
i want to call myself brave
for calling it off
but if i was brave
i would have stopped it at the start
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