Throw me in a shark tank,
Walk me through a field of thorns,
Lay me down on train tracks,
Punch my back so hard it burns,
Tear apart my photo books,
Tell me that I’m dumb,
Stab me with assumptions,
Steal my only source of income,
Burn all of my clothing,
Lie directly to my face,
Point a pistol at my head
and then Kick me till I bleed,
Strip me of my dignity,
Start a war inside my head,
Leave me without gravity,
Assume that I am brain dead,
Mislead my intuition,
Send a massive tidal wave,
Manifest my music
and watch my heart concave,
Then wait for me to fight back,
Watch me win the war of good,
Clambering to my feet I strike the mighty blow
and through my heart it pierces,
I have killed the enemy of man.
For when we think we are invincible we lose the upper hand.

the idea of being invincible
lingers in all of us
in some more than in others
in others less than in some
but as humans we tend to believe
that faith in one self can bring us peace
or war
it depends on which you desire
but it can also be used against us
sometimes even by ourselves
so be careful in which direction you lead yourself
what do you choose
what is better
the invincible for the use of evil
or paying a losing game for the good
what do you believe?

There’s a buzzing energy inside of me
I bounce from wall to wall
Ideas come and go
Scribbles of nonsense on plenty of paper
My mind is racing
It’s as fast as carousel
And I can’t seem to get off of it

I am a high level being
God is talking to me
He’s telling me I must sacrifice myself
These scars on my body tell different stories

The smallest bit of rationality tells me:
Take your medication
Talk to your support system
Call your therapist or psychiatrist

Oh, but manic me refuses
Manic me has cravings
That must be addressed
I must shop until my bank account is in the negatives
I must ******* until my fingers are numb
I must clean until there is nothing
Left to change
I must, I must, I must

But I can’t
Because I can’t seem to get out of bed
Because I scream at my family
When they least deserve it
Because I burst into tears
When I can’t figure out
Who I am anymore

Can’t you see?
This is a mixed episode
I’m trapped, stuck and alone
But just remember,
Despite all this

You can’t stop me
Why can you see?
I am invincible
I am invincible
Oh yes, I’m invincible

They say good boys never win, 
I thought it might be right. 
I’d always been good to people 
who'd only made me lose. 
Losers that made lose. 
 
And there was I,
the good boy gone bad, 
being good at being bad, 
being bad 
for the sake of not being good, 
because I wanted to win. 

I’d been craving  
to know what it was
not to lose myself 
trying to find purpose in someone else.

Until I found my one 
and got lost in those eyes. 
Now we're on each other's team 
and together we’re invincible.

inured to God's sexuality,
it brings forth the pleasure of humanity,
whiff of pristine philosophy,
church tears roar the frail allure,
the gift of power planted inside my inner dreams.

A girl, a fool, a sinner.
I dance on tabletops of marble and glass
And when I fall, I fall hard.
My blood on the floor
Stars in my vision
I stand, and I sway, and I laugh.

You see, I bleed everywhere.
Red stains on my sheets,
The pages of every book on the shelf,
The hands of the people who try so helplessly to hold me up.
A bullet wound that never heals
And my clothes are crimson just like my smile.

My fingerprints are everywhere,
****** and smudged,
Because I need to exist and I need it known that I exist,
I need my existence to be scientifically irrefutable
Because if there is no proof I was here… was I?

I am a ghost in the hallways of my own palace
Haunting my own home, a whisper in the walls.
I do not belong here I say in the mirror.
You do not belong anywhere my reflection replies.
I find the darkest corner and bury myself there until somebody comes looking
But nobody ever does. At least, not looking for me.
They’re looking for her, the reflection, the girl I could be,
But I go with them anyway because I can’t be alone for one more second.

A long time ago I was a healer, and people believed that one touch from me could fix
The worst of their problems.
It was a beautiful concept and when I held court there would be a line of villagers
Bowing at my feet, begging for a kiss on the forehead, and I obliged
Not knowing what infected my kiss.
I spread a plague amongst my people and they all fell,
And I woke up one morning alone.

I’ve realized that the gods aren’t invincible.
I’ve met them and seen their faults, their broken pieces.
I studied their weaknesses (and trust me, they all have weaknesses)
And when the time came, I didn’t just destroy them.
I devoured them.
If you’ve ever wondered what ichor tastes like,
It’s a lot like blood. Like copper.
(Ask me how an angel tastes. That’s a story for another day.)
You see, the only thing that is invincible is the teenage girl.
A stake through the heart, a silver bullet, the teeth of Cerberus himself,
They can’t touch her. She dances around them all
With agility you can’t fathom unless you’ve been her.
You can’t stop watching as she rises and falls, rises and falls,
Blood on the stage and her dress and her palms.
Like me, on my tabletop, a chipped-tooth smile
And bruised knuckles that let you know I can fight.

You don’t look invincible my reflection says one day.
Tangled hair, glistening eyes, pink splotches on my face.
I’m smiling but I’m shaking and there is blood everywhere this time,
On the mirror and the sink and the floor. I’m scared of her,
The girl in the mirror, because she is the only person who sees me like this.
She is the only person who knows the truth about me,
Knows my awfullest secrets and yet she stays in the mirror.
You don’t look invincible she repeats. You look broken.

I smile. A true, genuine smile, and there is still ichor on my lips.
Same thing, I tell her.