sometimes flowers just bloom to cheer up the ground
&' sometimes stars just shine to keep the moon company
sometimes cigarettes burn so hearts can extinguish
sometimes demons scream so souls can rest in silence
i fell in love deeply and utterly with the idea of being loved
the thought impulsively rushed along with my blood, feeding my heart
and i was waiting for it
like a little child waits in line for a rollercoaster drive
maybe we met in the wrong time zone
or in the wrong country, in the wrong city
or maybe we were meant to stay alone
we must have met on the wrong date
or maybe we met to soon or too late
we met in the wrong year on the wrong day
we met on the wrong path, the wrong way
but honestly, what where the chances
to meet under the right circumstances?
but that's fine
and until next time
i'll hold on to the believe that in another timeline we commit for a lifetime
if the universe decides for us, who decides for the universe?
almost is more
but never is clever
almost is pain
never, not ever
but is not even close better?
while almost is hope, but shattered
never is clearly not mattered
but it did matter, didn't it?
even if never
but almost is a wreckage, too
of not fulfilling the message to you
& where are we now?
no, never never never, but how?
isn't almost a wrecker of heart?
but rather never been there
than almost, but always apart
the idea of being invincible
lingers in all of us
in some more than in others
in others less than in some
but as humans we tend to believe
that faith in one self can bring us peace
it depends on which you desire
but it can also be used against us
sometimes even by ourselves
so be careful in which direction you lead yourself
what do you choose
what is better
the invincible for the use of evil
or paying a losing game for the good
what do you believe?
the tapestry that formed around my soul
was made of the eager to please you
now it has sunken in the ground and feeds from pain
narcissistic breeze in the air
and sunflowers slowly dying
it's cold again
here i am
drinking my sorrows
crying my pain
smoking my anger
can't stand the blame
freezing off my lungs
so i stop feeling
and start being numb