Few years ago I lost my grip on earth reality
and dwelled in a place where tears of bliss filled me daily.

I remember so vivedly,
as I had never felt so close to insanity.
My heart imploded and I cried happy tears for what felt like eternity.

I was so confused at what was happening, having never experienced such ecstacy for no such reason.

I remember telling myself, whatever happens from Now, it doesnt matter.
For experiencing this, nothing will shatter.

It comes unasked, unmasked, unnoticed.

Complete surrendering presence.
It could not be understood or named,
Only dwells in sweet deep silence.

And when I read of mystics who speak of such experiences,
I cant help but weep from rememberance.

He exists in ****** duality
Dwelling in ******* lips and tongue
She is born of blackest dimension’s strum

When the rifle conquest bellows loud
And slaughter’s hum be murderous roar
It rivers in winding bends
Of purest human shale
The destroyer’s chorus in innocent’s wail
Clammy skin of mistresses pale

Chant in rounds this king curse brain
Her obsidian Charon
His violent game
It thousand claws
It needle veins
Sand drowning corpses in rotting flame
It eldest spirit from ancient plains
She blood unholy
He flesh unchained
Forever wholly thirst insane
Dismembering life
In nomine
Essence
Essence
Essence

the most crucial thing
in every existing connection
in the boundless hoop
would be time

it could start and end
if it wants to  
it wouldn't care and pause
for your overflowing
blob of emotions
drowning your lungs
along with your organs

let me tell you,
i was a victim of time too
but oh, there are things
you don't deserve to know
anymore

I like pretending I'm infinite.
Nothing can touch me.
Nothing can stop me.
Nothing can hold me back.
I move through the clouds.
I connect the constellations with my bare hands.
The wonders don't stop.
The happiness doesn't stop.
Only the hurt.


-k.f

They say we can sense
hearing
smell
sight
touch
sound
taste

but what about danger?
love?
fear?

we can sense that someone is creeping up behind us
and sense that something bad is about to happen
can sense the change in the pressure in the air
and the need of someone else for a hug or kind word.

to say we have only five
is underestimating

but to say we have infinite?
we understand but few...
and that is why we teach five.

I do not understand why my shell is stronger than my soul
every single subconscious want is stuck in an eternal state of escape
slowly clawing away at my energy field
even the conscious thoughts I udder now are a work of my frontal lobe
a combination of fat and water that will one day be just that
what will it take for this exponentially real self of mine to erupt
too long I have sat in a puddle of this realization, this discomfort,
waiting
I am living as a shell of a person
stuck in a continuum of who I am and who I want to be
in this other reality, everything is an unexplored field
I am on a new level each time I turn the corner
no longer are there restraints
no longer do I feel this pain
my mind is not stuck in this body because I am my mind
I am my experience and that of which is experiencing me is my soul
soon drifting I become every electrical impulse,
and all of which is uncharged at the same time
no longer am I woman or even human
I am what is, what is not, and what always has been
now infinite, I escape