Life is ******.
Everything is ******.
**** this life.
I'm only here for her, even if all I ever do is cause her strife.
**** all of it,
I'm tired of this ****.

Does she even need me?
Should I leave her be?
After all, I'm sure she's sick of me
I want her to be free.
Not chained,
And for me to be the one to blame.

I don't know,
Whether I should stay or go,
It's all too confusing,
This constant feeling of losing.

this morning i awoke but torn inside
angered easily
distorted by reality
and I am even more angered with myself
i couldn't do what i want
then i decided i would write these words of my frustrations
I am isolated now
which brings even more alienation
but would i rather it this way?
I do not know
But i'd like to know
As i write i find myself
back to my space and own time
thanks to my keyboard

You think to yourself
“I’m always going to be mad at them”
You hope it’s true, though you secretly know it can’t be
When you’re mad you want to be mad
When you’re sad, a part of you feels alive
So you hold that grudge. Hold it tight
Because tomorrow, you might be happy
—back to square one.

I am
Eternally exasperated
Frequently frustrated
Incessantly irate
Perpetually perturbed

Awfully ambivalent  
Forever fickle
Frustratingly finnicky
Laconicly labile
Madly mercurial
Virulently volatile

And every other ******* adverb, adjective alliteration

She called me fool,
I heard it,
I loved it.
AAAAAAAARGGGGH.
Furiosa,
beautiful-strong.

Tho I'm Max,
Mad,
I am mad,
AAAAAARGHH,
I see my daughter sometimes,
she haunts my mind,
I miss-
AAAAARGHHHH.

The girls....
Not property anymore,
The coat-
AAAAARRRGHHH
breathes harshly breathes harshly
Mine.

The car....
Mine.
It's gone.

My blood...
Nux..
I wa-
AAAAARGGHHHH
breathes harshly breathes harshly breathes harshly
his blood bank,
he

HE's

Gone.

I need a jolt
just to break away from
the mental exhaustion
that I keep giving myself
a long walk in the park
to keep my brain from falling apart
I keep getting anxious
I keep getting scared that I'll never get my life together
that'll I'll be another statistic outside in all weather.
I'm stuck in a rut
between getting better and doing what I seem to do best, ******* up.
it's crazy because I know where I need to be but not how to get there

it took me this long to admit it but I'm scared.
terrified of what life may or may not do yo me
shivering in my boots at the fact that I have to face reality.
I'm frightened okay?! I admit it I don't know what more I can do...
because more than anything, I just want to be myself without losing you...

looking down while I hear shouting
“It’s all your fault”
I want to cry
I want to shout back
I want to scream
do I not have feelings?
can I not speak?
frustrated and angry
my lungs are filled
the burning sensitivity in my throat
I can sense the sobbing
I run to my room
the only comfort that was given to me
I can’t cry
I can’t shout back
I can’t scream
the throbbing of my heart against my chest
the clenching of my fists
the waterfall running down my face
the ripping of my hair
these human sensations
yet the pain inside will not go
is my soul shattering
broken
cracked
I feel nothing

I am a resident among stars, though I do not yet shine as brightly as they;
Among words and wonders, wandering, though not lost, still to find my way;
Among dreams unfulfilled, inheritance unwilled, love un-distilled, and a fervor un-obeyed. I am a young prince, and I am about, to come of age.
I will take the helm, I will rule a realm, and may Justice Rule my Reign.
For I am resident among stars, and 'tis my destiny to shine as brightly as they.