#bulimia poems on Hello Poetry

pixels Jan 2013

knuckles rubbed raw by
teeth so sharp and blunt
a tongue rough and silent

violent retching
self-harm for a throat
already held by a noose

she promises
just

one more cookie
one last bite
one last calorie
one last breath
one

the toilet bowl is her best friend
and she hugs it close
when no one can hear

#eatingdisorder #bulimia #ed #bulimic #eatingdisorders #purge #binge

camila annette May 2014

I always wear pink...

I always wear pink
But I am broken inside.
I always wear pink
But I don’t always smile.
I always wear pink
Because it shows how strong I have to be.
I always wear pink because it is my favorite color.
I always wear pink because I have no friends.
I always wear pink because it gives me hope
Though I have nothing to rely on.
I always wear pink to lie to everyone.
I always wear pink because it’s the only thing I have.
I always wear pink because my life
Is so messed up not even the brightest sun can
Illuminate it.
I always wear pink because I’m really not happy
But I have to lie to everyone so that they can be strong.
I always wear pink
For my extraordinary soul
That has nothing but a simple cut.
I always wear pink.
I always wear pink.

Ilona Inezita May 2014

Demons

Those feelings—
guilt, shame, disgust
rise up
as I shove them
down my throat.
Trying to fill myself up
only to have it emptied out.

March, 2014

#depression #pain #eatingdisorder #bulimia

Molly Apr 2014

Beauty

With a body temperature
Below 96 degrees Fahrenheit,
Wrapping yourself in bed sheets
As translucent as your skin
Seems so nice but
Every minute you spend
Shivering is more calories burned,
So you try to ignore it
Or maybe you do two hundred more crunches
Because being athletic is healthy,
Right?

You open the pantry only to
deny yourself sustenance because you
are unworthy of
These simple pleasures, and
You almost let yourself
Eat an apple but
When you remember how
Good that girl in
the thinspo you have
Hidden on your phone looks,
You stop.

You flinch when your mother
Calls your skin porcelain,
Because that word means
You failed to restrain yourself
And you have always been taught to
Resist temptation, and
This is the ultimate test.

Bolded letters

#beauty #anorexia #bulimia #thin #ed

Hayleigh Apr 2014

Mindless mouthfuls

i force down days upon weeks upon years,
of regret, pain, shame.
In one mouthful
And you wonder why it takes so little
For my stomach to be full.

#pain #hurt #eatingdisorder #anorexia #bulimia #eatingdisorders

camila annette Apr 2014

I am a happy girl?

I am a happy girl...
Though I go through the dark
and lay on my knees,
I laugh and I laugh
till my laugh leads to tears.

Though I look and I look
at the razor once again,
I open and smile and go back to my cave.

And even though
I cry my eyes out,
this is the image I show
to the world when i'm out.

The thing they don't
know is that my tears
lead to fears,
and my soul is a virtue
no one will ever meet.

It's not one of my best

camila annette Apr 2014

Untitled

Everything happens for a reason*, they say.

People say a lot of things. They talk and talk and talk. Not knowing that the person next to them is broken like a glass and says ‘I’m okay’ as if it were the truth. They just have no idea what it’s like. What it’s like to seek safety in other people. What it’s like to go home every day and cry until your eyes look like a tornado. What it’s like to not be happy for the fact that millions of internal voices take control of someone’s thoughts. They just have no idea.

this is bad

Taylor Johnson Apr 2014

Hunger

There is no lack of perfection
You need not change a thing
Form the tender years of your life
You began to
Hate,      \
Change,    Yourself
Starve,    /

You are utter beauty
No one should feel like this
Your four days,
Of unholy fast,
Must come to an end.

You are beginning t eat yourself
Form the inside out,
You are dying.
The shaking of hunger
Cause your body to tremble
In fear of what you are doing

This is not a willing decision
You've always been like this.
Without reasonable explanation.
No logical backing.
You are perfect.

I believe in you
Always and forever,
You have the strength
To overcome the hunger.

#iloveyou #perfect #eatingdisorder #anorexia #bulimia #hunger #ed #forafriend

camila annette Apr 2014

Untitled

I try to be like everybody else,
to fit in.
But when I try,
I just ****.

#suicide #poem #poetry #sad #depressed #bad #wrong #suicidal #mia #anorexia #bulimia #anna #sue #threesis

Molly Apr 2014

Call Me Skin and Bones

When I was younger
I was stick thin.
My aunt pulled my mom aside and cautiously whispered
Do you think she's been eating enough?
My third grade teacher
gave me the nickname
Skinny Minnie,
my gym teacher told me to
go eat a cheeseburger.

Now I look in the mirror
and cannot find my younger self.
My aunt did not blink an eye
when I said
I'm not hungry.
My teacher does not question
when I bring only a water bottle to lunch,
someone, please,
tell me to go eat a cheeseburger,
because I have only eaten
two-hundred calories today
but no one is calling me skinny.

I am trying to get better but I ate 1,250 calories today and even that makes me feel guilty

#ana #anorexia #bulimia #guilt #skinny