Your eyes look into mine
Graze at  me one more time
Your hands begin to twitch
As you feel the nervous itch
Your legs begin to move
Opening to the moon

Now my eyes start to wander
Intensions no surprise
holding back, binding time
from docile to volatile
Walk on the water for a while
I'll show you the way
The way everythings the same
My eyes examine you
you examine me too

lets us stop this dance
let us do what we long to do
connect my energy to you
I'm here inside you

What is a connection?
Something that binds - intertwines two souls together - for reasons unknown

Is it considered fate to feel connected to another person, another heart?
Another person's passions, fears, scars, cuts, and bruises?

What is considered a connection?
It is formed through words - touch?

What is considered a strong connection?
A binding, comfortable, mysterious, longing connection?

It must be a fate thing

'Truth will out', these words will haunt me.
My truth is nothing but bitterness behind watering eyes.
For my truth will shatter worlds as fragile as your heart.
My truth lies in each dreary hour, in every sleepless night.
Let my truth bind you, let it reel you in.
Make you powerless, uncomfortable in your skin.
Let my truth reveal your demons, realise your flaws.
Let my truth entice you, as my love withdraws.
My truth is nothing but bitterness behind watering eyes.
Truth will out.

those words rolled
out of my tongue,
become all yours.

           *

മൂന്നു സുവർണ മൊഴികളാൽ ബന്ധിതർ നമ്മൾ  (10 വാക്കുകൾ )
  
എൻ നാവിൽ നിന്നാ -
മൊഴികൾ പൊഴികയായ്,
അവയെല്ലാമിനി  നിനക്കുള്ളതായ്‌.
(Translated in to Malayalam)
                     *
மூன்று பொன் வார்த்தைகளால்  முடிந்திடப்பட்டோம்  (10 வார்த்தைகள்)

என் நாக்கிலிருந்து
அந்த வார்த்தைகள் பொழிந்தன,
அவையாவும் உன்னுடையதாயின.
(Translated in to Tamil)

In the glass of my memory sail my chaotic emotions
The ice all between them glistening, the moonbeams of my imagination
Reflect from the faceted rubies embedded within.
I again re-encounter the ecstasy of desire when I touch you.
Such encounters murdering all remnants of dreams
For finally I am ****** wholly into the fantastic reality of you
The joyful, mind numbing, gut heaving, love I feel
My ragged fingers set against an unreachable door
I am powerless to close against you
ever present beyond your love, flooding my veins and filling my soul
My life finally taking wing
Laughter, and fear, all emotions a collective illusion within me
You exceed the threshold of my existence
surrounding and sustaining me eternally
We belong forever solely to one another
Our dawn spent scavenging for each other like rats,
To be born in the afternoon, bald eagles
soaring the days away like gods
Now our lives entwined, no longer passing parallel to each other.

© Crystal Erickson  12/14/07

There are days when my body doesn't
Support me doesn't
Hold me close and
Protect me.
These are the days that I am a clay figure
Molded by clumsy hands shaped
With curves where there should be flat
Planes where I exist to create a mask a
Persona of who I am who I want to be.
These are the days when I want to avoid
My reflection yet check it to make sure it
Matches what I want to see.
These are the days that my reflection Never matches what I want to see where
My insides twist in disgust and I want to
Crawl inside myself and hide from the
World. These are the days when I wake up
Two hours early to prepare to layer first Binder then undershirt then shirt then Shirt then sweatshirt then jacket because
The bulk makes my body a secret.
These are the days when my body is a
Secret that I never want to reveal when
My steps are unsure and my face is set to
Boy-mode.
These are the days that I watch guys and
Imitate them stealing their walks hoping
I'll steal their identities so I don't have to
Live in my own.
These are the days that my heart fissures
When I am called "her" when a pronoun
Becomes an insult and
These are the days that I wish my mind
Wasn't so dead-set against my happiness
That I could just feel "girl" that I could
Just pretend it away.
But these
Are the days that I fight hardest to be who I
Am and fight to educate others and
Imagine a day when I won't be misgendered or gendered at all.