and to think there was a time
before, when i
constantly
****** myself into thinking
each and every
*******
grandiose,
helium-filled lie existed beyond your
illustrated delusion

jaundice driven, I needed you like a
kidney stone.
lies planted,
messily
nested, the
open wounds
painfully festering

quit using me.
regarding a fragile
soul as a
tool
used, atoms feverishly
vibrating for a quick
wasted,
xanax head high.
yes I can finally see the letter
z

and not think *Zachary

I want your embrace,
a tight grip on my thighs
your hands
pushing into my back
pulling me closer

I know
the marks you leave on my body
would be so different
than those before you

I've been smoking about you,
been drinking about you
even thinking about you

This drag, that swig
I'm high off your laugh,
drunk off your words.

A crater
similar to the moons'
Yet no where near
as grey
Your dimples
entrance me

Human hands are not *****
because they are covered in black,
no
they are ***** when covered in blood.

Let me in
the meadows of your mind
beckon me
with wild flowers
I have yet to see bloom elsewhere

Your doors are open
but also
covered by a sheer glass window
of pure, blissful ignorance

Your soul is refreshing,
we could be something
brilliant

I swallowed a cloudy sky
and kept it down for years,
finally
I can throw up this storm
raging inside me.

You took the sparkle from my eye
and placed it in the sky

Then you told me my head is always in the clouds,
I wonder why.

I thought your hands
were made of magic

Because when you touched me
my skin turned shades of pink
but also green and purple,
eventually blue and yellow

I still believe magic is real
but now I'm looking in different places

You are so sweet
tasting like sugar,
sweet liquorice,
drenched honey  

I want as much of you
as my mouth will allow

I'm such a fool
for wondering why
I have a cavity
now that you've
left.

As the moon
burns,
cutting the black curtain
of nightfall open

It drips its wax,
down like shooting stars
through the night sky

Upon Earth,
where a child catches it
and cups
the small firefly
in her tiny hands.

I could write poems
on your neck
and along your chest
with my lips

I could scratch poems
into your back,

I want to breathe
my poems into you.

Your vibe
is contagious

Which is nice
since you make me feel
like I'm invincible

As I outstretched
and reached
my hand
deep into the black infinity
of flowing wonders

I pinched my fingers
on something lovely
and pulled out of the black abyss,

A lovely star
dripping with
black infinity.

If a single rock
that ended up revolving our Earth
by pure accident
of path,
has the power to move the entire sea

Then I am important too
something out there depends on me

Walk through the forest at midnight
on a summer's night,
it will speak to you in ways
not many can comprehend

The trees will whisper
their leaves will beckon you,
dirt clings to your feet
and begs you to stay

But walk through the forest at midnight
on a winter's night
when the forest is a graveyard

The voices will be hushed,
they are frozen
in time
until next spring
when they will tug at your soul
again.

I want nothing more,
than to drunkenly dance
in the moonlight

Letting its glow
seep into my skin
so that maybe in the morning
I will be radiant too

Even the moon
is nothing more
than it's craters.

People are just as lovely
as sunsets,

Beautiful hues of pink,
will seep from their pores.
Astonishing shades of orange,
may flow from their hands.
Purple and blues
slide from their eyes.

You just have to be watching
at all the right times.

Act my age?
What does that mean?

The stars are billions of years old
but they're still beautiful
and if you get too close,
they'll burn you alive.

I took a shot
or two,
maybe three
of my favorite *****

And then I downed
that bottle
of NyQuil

I may not wake up
but at least I won't dream
about you.

I will not let you
knock down my walls,
its not that easy

But if you want me enough,
you could prove it
and

b
m
i
l
c

over them.
I’m only five feet tall.

Why did the birds
fly south without me

I would have come along,
I seek a greater warmth
as well

I'm sick of being cold,
I'm sick of being bitter

This chronic cough
has no mercy

However,
I'll let it take it's toll on my body,
because it's only doing me a favor
by purging every last bit of you
out of me

Each new gasp of fresh air I take in
is a breathe of yours I breathe out
and with that
comes your "love" that I had
accidentally swallowed whole

Maybe that's why I'm choking.

Blades of grass sparkle
in the reflection of the moonlight
as little crystalized
water d r o p l e t s
cling to them in spite of the biting wind

Yet not a flurry falls
but the air teases
a familiar s n o w y smell

December weather,
in early November
This is what w i n t e r feels like
at midnight

I thought I found the diamond in the rough,
and maybe I did
I just didn't think
that your sharp edges would cut so deep,
I can't say they didn't warn me,
beauty is pain.

As we kissed
the constellations in the skies,
started disappearing one by one
and reappearing in his eyes.

I stumbled back
and looked with wonder,
an entire galaxy twinkled in his iris
but I spared myself from the inhuman lure.

Maybe he was a galaxy,
he was still not my world.

I have always felt familiar with the stars—
the nights I’m saddest,
happen to be the nights they are brightest.
And it leaves me to wonder
maybe there is an afterlife
in the sky
but not in Heaven,
except among the stars.

Don’t you find it all too curious
that the population of people
who have ever existed on Earth,
is all too similar,
to the amount of starry specks in our sky?

And why is it,
that each time a friend of mine has passed
I notice something brighter
among the clusters in space.

If this is the after life,
waiting,
I’m no longer afraid.

You paused to look at me as if you were browsing a book shelf
and your fingers brushed ever so slightly across my skin
hesitating, lingering, at my spine.

Then you chose me
you laid me down and opened me up
it wasn’t easy because not many have read me before.

Your eyes looked me up and down, side to side
taking it all in,
engorging yourself.

You licked your fingers before you turned my pages
for a steadier and more meaningful grasp.
You said paper cuts were pretty
and that they were safe with you.

But then,
you read something you didn’t like
slammed the book shut
and shoved it back on the shelf.

Never take shelter in another human being—
we are weak foundations
no comfort within
because we all break, splinter, crumble
at some point,
concerned not where our rubble falls
and not who it destroys
but if it falls safely

She* had lavender hair,
it sometimes smelled like coconuts
when she passed by me quickly.
We were so excited to leave high school
to go away
together, as always.
But things never works out nicely because

I wrote she passed away,
And they wrote she was pronounced dead.

The trees really do have souls,
And they whisper to me ways
To not be sad anymore.

one day someone will love me for all the right reasons
and love finally won’t taste like the last sip of this *****,
but it will burn so