What am I?

I’m great fun and sometimes crazy,
Loud or soft with moods quite hazy,
Full of love, sorrow, unrequited loss,
One minute happy another sullen, cross.
I see the world in shades of neon gray,
Rarely do I care or anyone obey,
My vibes are epic, they constantly perplex,
Full of contradictions, invariably complex.
I can praise the Lord, drink myself into a stupor,
Stalking the room with unrequited humor.
*** is my go-to, gentle or pulsating,
Not always happy, at times tearfully heartbreaking.
I know the secret to capture every heart,
Life would be intolerable by keeping me apart.
Whatever you may think this is no passing phase,
I'm known to be pervasive and hound your mind for days.
My moods are epic, a journey to discover,
Your friend to soothe you or belatedly recover.

Come on - What am I?

There’s a part of me that say’s I’m jealous
Another thinks my golfing friends just zealous,
Whilst I crave fresh air and healthy motion
They’re busy slathering on the lotion
Before they mount some little cart
That with intent they simply point to dart
At breakneck speed from hole to hole
The putting of that little ball the goal.

Then there’s the clubs, that myriad bunch
The choice of which for them the crunch,
To make the shot or fail once more
Blaming each for that bad score.
Tortured, ruffled, discontent,
They soon repair to that drinks tent
To then replay the whole long game
Masterful excuses quickly turning lame.

But here’s the crunch and my dilemma
The doubt that heightens my antenna,
What are they hiding, sharing not a bit
Of why such torture never makes them quit,
Instead they plan and scheme each waking hour
For that free day the calendar they scour,
When they once more may hold that special club
With surging will some dainty green to stub.

What did I do,
Quite the disaster, but if only they knew
The depth of the hole I find myself in,
Thank goodness ambition is no mortal sin.

I seriously thought this thing would be fast,
A simple invasion, a side show, a blast,
Over by dinner then pop the Champagne,
Ukraine by name only, Russia’s domain.

Never the thought came into my head
That a little B actor would play me instead,
Tenacious and cunning he's proven to be
But if chess is the game, good luck playing me.

The West struts its stuff, more noise than effect,
A mish mash of junk all easily wrecked,
Perhaps they forget the Russian resolve,
Stay tuned for a while and watch it evolve.

Ukraine is no match for what we can do,
Time our best friend and that's always been true,
We're patient and hardy, impervious to pain,
We'll suffer and bleed for what's ours to gain.

Don't read me wrong I want this to end,
I'm just very careful which message I send,
At the end of the day I'll make a tough deal,
And a big swath of land I'll invariably steal.

Ukraine won't be happy, the West will cry foul,
But don't be impressed, it's merely a howl,
A little play acting for show and effect,
As for this to continue they clearly all dread.

Ignore the odd glitches it's the outcome that counts,
This hasn't been pretty, a truth with few doubts,
But often what shines is merely fool’s gold,
Land is the key and Ukraine’s I will hold.

What did I do, what Karma is this
Where is the power, the glory, the bliss,
I didn't sign up for this constant pain,
I'm losing my mojo, going insane.

I gave up a bunch, my whole pampered life,
The glittering lights, a model for wife,
A media in love, fans all around,
Success beyond words to truly astound.

The Don was the man, the king of the heap,
The world's superstars in my presence would steep,
Invites and connections too many to count,
Politicians included my patronage tantamount.

My wealth and prestige more radiant than gold,
Everyone buying whatever I sold,
From Casinos to Pageants, Hotels by the score,
Anything Trump they just wanted more.

And now what is this my world full of grind,
My presence and words despised and maligned,
Melania so mad I tiptoe at night,
To then sleep alone, a truly sad sight.

But what my recourse, I've little to say
What I would do, what would I pay
To rewind the clock, swallow my pride,
Stick to my golf and from politics hide.

Too late for all that, I'm in to my neck
Just hoping and praying to avert a train wreck,
History's blunt it favors the winners,
No pity or quarter for ambitious beginners.

So here's the game plan, my only real shot
To well clear my name and wipe out this blot,
Another four years that's what I so need
For me to yet prove that I truly can lead.

And lead I sure will despite that grim bunch,
I'll use my fine guile peppered with hunch
To ram home the point beyond any doubt,
That I am the one with God-given clout.

Whispers and innuendo,
Partisan politics tearing us apart,
Grandstanding and deflection,
Are we not placing the horse before the cart?

A divisive President
This much we all agree,
But our actions matter,
This surely we must see.

Impeachment is not the answer
When facts are merely ploys,
Interpreted, discarded,
Like a child’s forgotten toys.

Democrats all shouting,
Republicans dismayed,
Eye rolls and bluster,
Each entrenched not to be swayed.

Forgotten the crumbling bridges,
The misery of those without a roof,
Healthcare that’s little caring,
Policies enacted on the hoof.

Progressives on soap boxes,
Berating us to change our ways,
Ditch the cars, eat just plants
You haven’t years, but merely days.

Conservatives all hiding,
Resistance the key word,
Dig more coal, farm those parks,
Their inverted thinking so absurd.

Are we all this angry
That reason we can’t find.
Have our senses dissipated
To the point of turning blind?

What legacy our children,
A society torn apart,
Our moral compass lost,
A sail-less boat without a chart.

What qualities make a ‘successful man’,
Is it the tambor of his voice,
Some lofty goals, a lifelong plan,
A steering hand, his knowing choice.

Can compassion play a part
Or is that interpreted as meekness;
Is it wrong to show a heart
Without labeling it as weakness?

Does strength need to be paraded
A steely front for all to see,
Is authority degraded
When others sometime don't agree?

An old proverb said as much:
"A wise man is one who listens"
Few have had the Midas touch
And those that did have breached divisions.

Three traits renown - the deadly cluster,
The very ones to spell out doom,
Bravado, Braggadocio and sheer Bluster,
For all they bring is downright gloom.

So where's the rulebook, that golden fleece
To show the way and light the path,
That font of knowledge and inner peace,
Assured success without the wrath?

Where it exists is inner strength,
A willingness to learn whilst teaching too,
Consistency and grace to any length,
Embracing all of us, not simply you.

What price adventure
When the risk outweighs the venture,
No dishonor not to start,
Merely you just being smart.

If compunction is the cause,
That adrenaline rush which draws,
Take a breath and think it through,
Is the only one affected - you?

Does bravery need be so foolhardy,
With reason as an afterthought and tardy,
When blind desire clearly trumps all thought,
For ego trips that can be simply bought.

Extreme tourism knows no other name,
Never quite the path to everlasting fame,
At best it gives a sudden winded rush,
At worst with Death itself you'll surely brush.

So many have regardless met such fate,
Gone far too soon before their fated date,
For every mountain peak or ocean deep,
Lie countless graves where mothers sadly weep.

When she’s sick I’m so in trouble
Rocks my world, bursts my bubble,
All at once my head is spinning,
Forehead aching, hair fast thinning.

I’m not trained to handle chores,
Clean the house, go to stores,
Cook the meals, feed the kids,
My existence on the skids.

Give me patience, show me how
She won’t quickly disavow
This poor man she claimed to love
And not give him one huge shove.

I’ll do better, I’ll learn fast,
Even try to make it last,
Wash the sheets, make the bed,
Just the thought fills me with dread.

Shoulders back, chin protruding,
Smile so wide, no more brooding,
‘Yes, My Dear’ the sure answer,
Float on air like a tap dancer.

Read her cues as if an actor
Whatever challenge not a factor,
Learn each job just like a pro,
Then recount it blow by blow.

I adore this girl so much,
There’s truly nothing I won’t touch,
Clean or fix around the house
To be that perfect loving spouse.

But God I pray with all my soul
That soon you make her fully whole,
Please start now and make it fast
As for sure I won’t long last.

I know I'm slightly losing it and Jill sees that now too,
So all we can but hope for is to Bluster and to Woo.
What If I sometimes falter with names or something more,
Only Fox is bent on keeping that lame and pointless score.
The rest of my fan Media provides me with great flak,
While I air my inner Irish and repeatedly attack.

As to the clueless voters I truly feel for all,
I quietly do get them, as the choices do appall.
Trump is but a cannon with a worn-out rusty bore,
Little in the barrel spraying mayhem aft and fore.
And to my friend Kamala, words truly don't suffice,
But no-one of sound mind would want to roll that dice.

So what are we now left with that possibly makes sense,
To getting people voting and off that dreaded fence.
I'm quite the only choice if truth be clearly told,
Despite the fact I'm quirky and obviously quite old.
Thank goodness for the knowledge my team will see me through,
I bless HIM every night for this weird creative crew.

They tell me what to say whenever I might need,
Have me practice all **** day to show that I can lead.
It's a challenge for them all but what about for me,
I’m sure it’ll be worth it in the end as you will see.
And while this plan unfolds I’ll keep a low profile
Speaking ever less as has become my style.

There is one thing that worries me far more than I would care,
Jon Stewart's now resurfacing with his weird confounding stare.
Throwing comments like sharp knives as a rapper from the hood,
And jabs like some street **** with a blistering left hook.
I’m asking my top people to rush him off the air,
The answer that I’m getting is pretend he isn’t there.

None of this a problem, the story of my life,
I cherish a good brawl and every dose of strife.
Abortion is my ticket with progressives by my side,
This alone will stem the frothing MAGA tide.
Just watch me now perform with my wily stash of tricks,
For if Trump is made of Teflon, I’m made from Scranton bricks.

Defeated , deflated,
despondent, degraded,
All fun out the door,
Am I mad to want more?

Hyenas all circling,
Baying and burbling,
They hunt for a thrill
The chase and the ****.

Bombarded, lambasted,
Prodded and tested,
My world pandemonium,
Surrounded by odium.

I've worked and I've tried
For greatness I've strived,
So little compassion
Today's angry fashion.

All I now say,
All I now do,
Battered and burned,
No sympathy earned.

Yet on I go,
I toil and I sow,
For a better tomorrow
Masking my sorrow.

But let the chips fall,
I'll weather this squall,
I'm great at this game
Who then will they blame?

You may well ask where am I,
Am I engaged or fully checked out,
Take a seat, happy to clarify,
Placate your mind, dispel any doubt.

I'm Biding my time and that's not a joke,
Giving the old guy time to implode,
He's senile and tired, befuddled and woke,
Any wires remaining will for sure  overload.

The Border is crumbling, COVID runs wild,
Afghanistan gone, China supreme,
Kamala in hiding, lost and beguiled,
Progressives now surging their wishlist extreme.

Nancy grandstanding, Chuck babbling loud,
Cuomo shot down, who would have known,
Just goes to show it's good to be proud,
If your cover is solid and not wholly blown.

I'm mulling and watching disasters untold,
Inflation unbridled, crime running wild,
The Media's support from lukewarm to cold,
Uncle Joe's moods ever more riled.

Well may you ask why I seldom now speak.
The answer is simple and easy to grasp,
Time is my friend as you see week by week,
And eventually bites like a poisonous Asp.

Where women aren't quite women
They're Menstruating folk,
Their gender simply Human,
The world gone truly woke.

Grasping for atonement,
The art of double speak,
The fancy of the moment
Our words they cutely tweak.

Political correctness,
Not He, nor She, but It,
In search of urban fairness,
With some a glowing hit.

For others who stay silent,
Not knowing what to say,
On tact sorely reliant,
For this to pass they pray.

But how about this thought
To brighten up your day,
Good sense is rarely taught
So why should wokes hold sway?

We the startled masses
Muted for so long,
Know Thoroughbreds from *****,
That's how we get along.

Now they’ve done it, this is real,
Trying hard my job to steal,
Why they’d want it no-one knows,
This frenzied pack of feeding crows.

Impeach for this, Impeach for that,
A sirens’ song that just falls flat,
They little know I planned the lot,
Goading Biden to this spot.

I may be brazen but I’m not dumb,
To simple traps I don’t succumb,
A life of deals, of double talk,
I choose the prey I want to stalk.

Let them rejoice, exchange high fives,
Parade on air flaunting their knives,
While all the time I’m hard at work,
Piling dirt on that servile clerk.

Six feet deep or even more
Is how I’ll settle this one score,
And then who’s left – two ****** fools,
The one just blabbers, the other drools.

So bring it on, I wait with glee,
For all the world this show to see,
Four more years with me on top,
All their efforts one huge flop.

Impeached, indicted, discredited, expunged,
Forsaken and little short of being hanged,
Does the punishment truly fit the crime,
Inciting sedition and for that I need do time?

Are they crazy or simply deaf,
Do they think I work for UNICEF,,
A do-gooder, a kind hearted soul,
The kind of man to pigeonhole?

I'm a maverick, a crusader at heart,
The one to lead, feats to start,
I change the world it doesn't change me,
I push and I pull, won't let things just be.

So someone please tell me where I went wrong,
Was I not trusted to be valiant and strong,
To Shake the tree, purge that swamp,
On bureaucracy and waste simply stomp?

Build the country, cut to the chase,
Squash every foe, win every race,
And now what, have I've gone too far,
Plunging to earth like a falling star?

Give me a break, cut me some slack,
I did a great job, the country's on track,
Save for this Covid all would be fine
All other Presidents would I outshine.

Don't undervalue, don't underrate
I'm the one man you can't just abate,
Count me out at your peril, think I’ll retire,
For those that have crossed me, their future is dire.