I entrusted my joy in your core,
It fit so perfect, but you wanted more.
I gave you my laughter, my light, and my glee,
Yet you turned away, too full of **** to see.
Now I stand alone, in the wreckage of bliss,
Longing for moments I’ve learned to miss.
You took my happiness, wrapped it in lies,
And left me to gather the tears from my eyes.
In the ruins of trust, I gather my pain,
Each tear that I shed feels like falling rain.
So I reclaim my sanity, my morals, my dreams,
No longer entrusting my heart to your schemes.
I’ll rise from the ashes of what you destroyed,
And learn to embrace the strength I’ve employed.
With each passing day, I’ll gather my might,
And learn to find joy in the stillness of night.
I’ll rebuild the pieces, reclaim my own ground,
In the silence of leaving, my strength can be found.
And in the wreckage, I’ll rise from the dark,
No longer defined by your once glowing spark.
I’ll carve out my joy, piece by piece,
And from the ashes, I’ll find my release.
I’ll dance in the shadows, I’ll laugh through the pain,
For I am the master of my own refrain.
I’ll rise like the phoenix from flames of regret,
Embracing my freedom, I’ll never forget.
The lessons I learned from the love that went wrong,
Will echo in me, a resilient song.
So here's to my heart, still beating, still brave,
In the depths of despair, I found how to save.
Each moment that passes, I’ll gather my scars,
For they’re part of my journey, my own guiding stars.

You looked deep into my eyes
Like you were searching for something
And I hoped you were looking for me
But you were looking for yourself
So I closed them, **** your ego.

I entrusted my sanity in your eyes
Your ******* eyes held my mind
But when you blinked, uncertainty entranced my worrisome mind
And I found myself justifying your eyes; shut, closed, empty

I entrusted my morality in your hands
Two ******* hands held my morals
And you knew it too, so you let go of me
And I found myself desperately clinging to the edge of a cliff, no longer your hands

I entrusted my hopes in your chest
Skin and bones and my ******* hopes
But you exhaled more often than I expected
And I found my hopes drifting further, further away

I entrusted my dignity in your vertebrae
I guess your ******* back was broken, carrying my dignity
It did enough to carry your head high
And I found myself offering to fix it so you could carry more than just mine

I entrusted my happiness in your bowel
Fit so ******* perfect, my happiness in you
But you happened to be so full of ****
And I found myself now wanting my happiness back

You drew blood and I called it paint
As though these veins hold art
And you were creating a masterpiece
To be hung up in my heart

I love you so much

I wish that I could give you this eternity

That we could have a little old black cat

Who we were convinced was a witch

I wish we could grow with her

Sharing all our hearts between us three

And I wish we could cry together as her time came

And plant flowers over her grave

And mourn and feel and fall on each other

Like leaves on the ground

I wish we could spend our eternity

Laughing to lull us into sleep

In our old bed that you’ll complain hurts your back

But that we never change

Despite the creaks and the way it feels

Like it might break under us

Because it never does

I’d spend my eternity running early

And you a little bit late

And we’d meet somewhere in the middle

I’ll always ask you to turn your music down

Your response will be to dance when I do

I won’t be able to help but laugh and join you

We’ll have an eternity of loud music and silly dances

I’ll eventually put up with the way you play your music

Because you put up with my bad singing

And we will be the most annoying people in love

In the nursing home

I wish I could give you my eternity

I know we’d be so incredibly happy

But my eternity is ending early

And yours is running late

So you’ll have to bury our little witch alone

And plant the flowers on your own

But know, I love you so

It's no one else problem it's mine my own
I should've just stuck through it all alone
I should've sewn my mouth shut and kept it at that
But instead I had to fight not realising they would fight back
And I tried to do it I really did
But I'm not strong enough to go through with it who am I to kid
I'm weak and that's all I will be
I mean look at me how can you not see
He can take it all **** it let him
I've got nothing left this is my last whim
And so I'm pulling out like they all expected
I'm lay down the gun and let them put it to my head

He told me he loved me and
I bleed from the heart
He told me that he needed me and
My spinal cord snapped
I told him it was over and
In time it came back,
I came back.

And you'll be my resolution
Because in the end you are the issue
The light in the darkness
The darkness in the moon
Like an unhappy sailor is to his crew
Like the lost paddle is to the canoe
I need you

When I look through your eyes
I can’t see me
Just the shadow of something
... demonic
And when you look though my eyes
You still can’t see me

Soft whispers that are meant to be calming but instead
Cause a tidal wave of fear and panic
To wash over my logic
And cause a devastating aftermath

You tell me i can say no but cut my words off with the slip of Your tongue
my mouth is but a puppet and Yours, a puppeteer
my feelings simply putting on a performance for Your senses
And i can't let down my audience

my body is private property and You are trespassing,
Hands devouring every inch of bare skin begging for more
And i am frozen, like the trees in the ground my mountains can't tumble in a last effort of self-defence so i stay quiet
Like the house on the end of the street

my emotions have been set on fire and You are the flame
Spreading across my body like the plague
You take advantage of my vulnerable state
Filling me with toxin upon toxin to get me to cooperate

You ask me if i want to as though Your hands don't hold my pride
Fingers wrapped around my oesophagus
Strangling my reprisal
and i am unable to speak through the loneliness

Darkness engulf the room and i can see Your intentions,
Your eyes burn with desire and like a statue
my efforts fail to move You, You are a train heading towards a collision
Your breaks will only slow You down

There is nothing i can do

So i'll sew my eyes shut and my mouth with glue
i'll toss aside my mind to forget about You
i'll shatter my bones and burn off Your touch
And as i lay there, i hope;

That Is Enough.

The wind blows a cool breeze speaking a language that I can only hope to understand
The sun shines through the barriers of leaves cascading down to hold me tightly, comfortably
The foliage steady underneath my unsteady feet promises to give me balance
The water buries the sand pulling it back into line always returning it safely home

A soft creature appears from behind the green wall crouching curiously in fear, denial
Unable to speak like the wind it simply blinks, both yellow eyes; once, twice, three times
The long fur covering it's body blows with the western breeze head tilted towards the east
It rises on two feet; remains stationary, despite the wind pushing it back

An array of colours catches light from the creature; yellow eyes, purple fur, black teeth
The deflection of colours creates a rainbow around the creature; a force field
It casts no shadow despite the downward sun trying its hardest to expose the creature
The array of colours surrounds the creature fading away with the sun behind the leaves.

The foliage struggles against its foot moving forward in a staggering motion as if they were glued
Fallen leaves crumble underneath its feet and flowers rot to a bruised purple
Like quicksand the ground tries to swallow the creature, hold it still despite its strength
Quicksand is not quick enough, the creature shuffles through the dying foliage

The water retreats, taking the sand with it, gathering as large an army as possible
The creature continues forward, the water continues back as far as it can before returning to shore
They meet in an unwelcome collision the water trying to push the creature back, unsuccessful
The creature emerges from the water droplets of water being repelled from its fur

The wind changes direction pointing at me whispering words of caution whispering, yelling
The sunlight illuminates me, sweat drips down my face like tears as if to say: hide
The ground shakes and trembles beneath my feet urging me to move, keep moving
The water reaches for me with open arms to hide in amongst the sand, to return safely

The creature spots me; staring unflinchingly, it stares back into my eyes with yellow ones
It's fur directing it towards me urges it onward dragging it alongside the cool breeze
It's feet start toward me slowly as the trembling ground regains its posture so does it
I stand in awe of this beautiful creature, so frightful so delicate aiming for me

"Humph" the sound of it colliding with me is carried away with the wind, long gone
The sun gleams off its black teeth blinding me before I feel it rip into my neck tearing flesh
The green, brown, purple ground lay stained with my blood dripping from its mouth
The incoming tide holds my hand one last time as the creature drags me back behind the green wall

We made assumptions based on daisies
and tied our hair in bows,
sold ourselves without a price tag,
to those we didn't know.

You could scream my name into the abyss,
and I still wouldn't believe it meant more than this:

That it meant more than the way you hold my hips,
That it meant more than the way we kiss,
That it meant more than you're eyes locked in mine,
That it meant more than all of our time combined,
That it meant more than a bunch of letters,
That it meant more than just to make you better,
That it meant more than you're desire to touch me,
That it meant more than the skyline above me,
That it meant more than the fingers intertwining,
That it meant more than a dark silver lining.

That it meant more than the way you tell me you love me.
That it meant more than the how easily you shrug me
off.

The world is round but its edges are sharp,
Love and hate weaving light in the dark.
We rise through the pain, we bend but don't break,
For joy only blooms from the storms we must take.
The warmth of the sun, after shadows have passed,
Reminds us that nothing is meant here to last.
The tears that we shed, the scars that we bear,
Are proof of the strength that was always there.
In darkness, we find the flicker of light,
The stars shine the brightest against the night.
Happiness whispers from sorrow’s refrain,
For only through loss do we treasure the gain.
The duality dances, a balance so fine,
We stumble through heartache but still realign.
In love, there is fear, but also release,
In hate, there’s a lesson that leads us to peace.
So we hold to both—both the light and the shade,
Knowing through contrast, the beauty is made.
For without the rain, the sun has no worth,
And through every ending, there's always rebirth.
The world is round but its edges are clear,
We learn through each joy, we grow through each tear.
The fire of anger, the calm after rain,
Are threads in the fabric that ease every pain.
For how could we know the beauty of day,
If night never came to lead us away?
And how would we cherish the touch of a hand,
If we never felt what it’s like to withstand?
In breaking, we’re mended, in silence we hear,
That love isn’t perfect, but always sincere.
Through loss, we find value, through grief, we find grace,
And even in absence, there’s warmth we embrace.
The sharpest of edges carve wisdom inside,
A mirror reflecting the tears we once cried.
But we learn to dance with the cuts and the scars,
For they make us shine brighter than all of the stars.
The duality breathes, like the ocean’s soft tide,
Pulling us under, then setting us wide.
In moments of darkness, we learn how to glow,
And love shows its depth through the pain we let go.
So we stand at the edges, unafraid to fall,
For in falling, we rise—taller than all.
Both shadow and light are part of our story,
Each step through the dark brings us closer to glory.

They walk as though each step might be their last,
Like the ground might disappear underneath their feet
And oblivion will swallow them whole, in one mouthful

Their eyes are a faded shade of sadness,
Like all the tears in the world have dimmed the
Sparkle that once caught light in the blackest night

They mumbles words of wisdom to an ambivalent crowd
Like the advice might cause indiscretion in
A room full of certainty and over assured egos

I'm still learning how to do this
I'm still learning how to trust
It's harder than I expected
But I'm trying not to give up

You see its all so new to me
All these emotions I'm feeling
But no matter what happens to us
It's us I believe in

Downstairs awaits me
With warm Chinese food and
A couch otherwise occupied
And I have no desire to
Walk the stairs.

The sun charges through
Blinds that hold strong despite
The danger posed to them and I
Ignore their faded-ness

An empty mug sits beside me
In an unwelcome empty harmony,
Don't look at it. It can will you
To put it in the dishwasher

The world is round,
but it's edges are sharp.

How do people do it
This thing this life
I just don't get it
There's no purpose in mine
It's like the sun that rises
Will only fall
And the clouds that cover
Shed tears for us all
The oceans offer safety
In a dangerous form
They offer solitude
Their cold hands seem warm
The trees that surround
Seem barren and bare
For when I look to them
I see my body hanging there

Hold her close, she ‘s no one else
Just for a moment, then leave her to herself.
Warm her hands, only to have them cool
Kiss her mouth, leave the drool.
Tell her lies, then block her ears
Tell her you love her, then tell her no one cares.
Freeze her heart, shatter the ice
Pick up the pieces,
You
Are
Her
Vice

No one loves you like your mother.
And god I hope that's true,
because my mother looks at me
with eyes colder than blue.

His voice is enough to ignite the fireworks in my chest
O' his words are enough to bring me thoughts of yellow
Thoughts of him; of him of him of him
and the cruelest thought of all
That yellow is the flowers to be laid at my casket

We haven’t for a week now
And I’m hurting
With the fury I imagine
Burns in hell.

We had a argument

I don’t even know why
Or how it started but
I began to cry
Uncontrollably and
You didn’t
Understand why
But in the past
Arguments like that
Would end in fist fights
And cruel words
So when you didn’t
Lash out at me
I couldn’t
comprehend
It

Or that kind of love

A soulmate
is all the parts of you
You thought
you hated
They show up
and challenge
Who you thought
you were
And show you
who you can be
With a bit of love
and a whole
Lot of natural,
loving energy.

I watched myself die
Played it over and over
Scanned it for all the little details
How did this happen
When did this happen
Why did this happen
I saw myself fall away
Saw the parts of me I loved, leave
And the parts of me I hated, grow
I became super human
Able to shape-shift
I could break, shatter and crumble
And still come back together
You couldn’t see the cracks
But it took all of my efforts
To keep from falling apart again
I wept through the seams I sewed
And said it was sweat and maybe it was
After all I was working so hard
To keep track of all the pieces
I had left of me, the pieces
I didn’t lose when I watched myself die

I think the world will drown in my tears
That's how it'll end
I think the world will burn with my fury
That's how it'll end
I think the world will shatter with my screams
That's how it'll end
I think the world will crumble under my feet
That's how it'll end
I think the world will break along with my heart
That's how it'll end


I think the world will end
But let us remain

I stayed up late
to talk to you
You invited me to a party
that I couldn't come to
I couldn't get there
And you never offered a lift
All you said was hurry
Please come quick
I said goodnight
You didn't reply
I took it as your drunk mind
Taking its time
But when you still didn't
I began to wonder
Maybe I'm in the wrong
Maybe I made a blunder.

I prefer winter because the cold air reassures me,
the way it caresses my skin and holds me,
until ripples appear on the surface of my trust,
I know not to give in to it's cool, light touch.

I used to want a lover to write a love poem about me

So this is a love poem for me, by me

I make my bed every morning, because it’s the first place I think about being after a long day
And sometimes I lay out pyjamas and face masks in case things don’t go so okay
I drink coffee on my own and enjoy exploring new sites and cities alone
I smile when I lock eyes with strangers and aren’t afraid to strike up conversations
I go swimming in the ocean alone, it’s the only way I truly feel the energy in my bones
I finish hot showers with a blast of cold water and smile when I see fathers and daughters
I think love is perplexing and don’t trust easy
But rest easy knowing I’m right here if I ever need me

And I looked at you
As the world drummed out
Around me
And I saw for the first time
My uncertainty in us
In you
In me
In everything
we could ever be
And I realised
I was giving you all I could offer
And if you didn't want it
I would let you
Be my destruction

You care about cars
And you care about bras and bars and breaking girl's hearts
But mostly you care about cars

Maybe it's the 4 wheels
Because the 4 wheels are the most you've ever had in your life
And they're the sturdiest thing you got isn't that right
And those 4 wheels don't stop at traffic lights
I think those 4 wheels will take you to heights that
Your legs couldn't

Maybe it's the engine
Because that engine is the only resource you've got for warmth
That engine will carry you through the toughest terrain
That engine will never let you down again
Because you know the cranks more than you know anything
That engine is what's keeping you going

And so you care about cars
And you care about bras and bars and breaking girl's hearts
But now I can understand why you care about cars

You like them sick,

With an appetite of cigarettes and ****

Yours, to be specific

Small enough for you to scare

But big enough for no one to care



You like them easy,

Freakish in what they’ll do to please

Only you, to be specific

Willing to do everything and anything  

For their all mighty king



You like them dumb,

It’s easier to get away with it that way

For you, to be specific  

Bruises raise less alarms  

When they’re wrapped in your arms



You like them disposable,

Dolls you can interchange whenever you want

For you, to be specific  

When you get bored of her  

Swap her for someone else you’d prefer.

You **** me like its love

And I crave your love like

it’s the air I need to breathe  

And so, I use your ***  

to satisfy my needs