Okay, okay, geeze
They're only follies
I'm sorry, have mercy,
I can surrender no further,
I plea on my knees
Doesn't matter how hard you squeeze
There's nothing left,
I have nothing left
I'm begging you please
When you leave,
Just deposit me by the other empties

©2023

I've fought a lot to get it out, tried to keep it out, but I can not
I scream and shout,
"WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT?"
Even post realization that it's all for nought
Had an ill advised, never properly revised, recurring thought
Form an in home gym enterprise to exercise demons on the spot
More issues to stack like russian dolls is all I ever got
Caught each slow kiiller by keepin' it in house to follow the origin plot
Scrip changes happen often regardless of what me, myself or I want
Zero red yarn supplied, can't attempt a connection with any new dot
I play my part in my story as the man forgiveness forgot
Both what I keep in and what spills out identified as the source of the rot

©2024

If you care promise to never let me know
Never turn around, never let it show
Don't point out the stretch that turned friend to foe
It's far too late to pray it ain't so
But nothing was nurtured, allowing nothing to grow
So, if you want to stay please, for me, tell yourself no
And just go

©2024

If I can't hold on
If I let life slip by like you said I'd do all along
As the tiniest violin plays my theme song
Would you lose faith in me as a person?
As another flawed human?
Or is it set in stone as a bygone conclusion?
I've begun to become withdrawn
So it shouldn't be long
If I must let go I'll aim for the lawn
And you can sleep well knowing you were not wrong

©2024

Given a hand to go hand in hand in the park
Only allowed to be enjoyed in the dark
And as I curse the idea of an always present silver lining
I notice it to be easier to witness the splendor of our spark

©2025

How does it always find me?
Easy,
It is me
At the very least it's in me
Darkness is part of this story
And it's not something to envy

©2024

An endless search
For before the hopeless
Prior to the pain
Pre drowning in sadness
It must be there
That rare moment of bliss
I can't FUCCKING remember,
"Has it always been like this?"
A lost sliver of memory
Eerily missing the feeling like a lipless first kiss
The want and drive evident
But before it all, most memorable, there to trigger the fall, my evil twin, Sir Anxious
I tear up as I absorb old videos
Finding the smile in milestones of my son, a present I was pleasantly present to witness
"...ah, there it is,
My piece of bliss
An unchecked happiness
Oh how I miss this..."
But I did this,
I have no business
Asking for a witness
Or forgiveness

©2024