Beebz the queen
That is my name
I cannot refuse
To play this game
I am awestruck
By all this noise
I cannot focus
On all these boys
I am the queen
And not the *****
I beg your pardon
Excuse the french

Baby I don't know why I told you I was done
Why I said I didn't want to speak again
The truth is, I want you with me always
Because I trusted you enough to let you in
I let you in who I was and who I wished to be
I let you in my heart, in my head, in my pants
I thought the more I let you in there'd be hope
That maybe you'd finally give "us" a chance
You used to hold me so carefully like I'd break
Which made me certain I could never be strong
So I clung to you like I hoped you cling to me
But I never knew that I could be so wrong
My heart is literally aching, and throbbing
My mind is trying to erase you from me
Your hands, your lips, that smile, those eyes
It's soon to be gone, maybe then I'll be free
But I know freedom cannot be reached
Because still these chains hold me back
I'm bound to you because I loved you
This bond will make my heart crack.

For so long I had no words to write
And it made me mad, down to my core
I never thought I'd write of you and me
And practically admit to being a *****
But here I am always writing it out
And somewhere maybe you'll read this and cry
Because you'll know you've ruined me
With every promise, every kiss, every lie
I made you promises and I kept them all
And I would willingly run back into your arms
I'd hold you tight and cry all night
If you promised to sheild me from all harm
I know this poem is too ******* long
It's hurting me to write it all out honestly
I want him to see this though and feel bad
I want him to finally cry over how he hurt me.

They tell me to talk about it
They promise itll help
But little do they know
There was no emotion that i felt.
I dont think they realize
Im over the past
I see it all now
Why none of it seemed to last
No longer do i give a ****
I cant give it up for them
Why doesnt anyone agree?
Can i get a ******* "Amen"??
Im done, so finished
I cant take it anymore
You see that is why
Ive locked every door.

some people hate themselves for who they are
others hate themselves for what they've done

but me, i hate every breath that i breathe
i messed up; i was so sure that he was the one

i cry myself to sleep every night
because i know that i am to blame

for breaking what we had apart
i was the one playing the game

*i slept with a guy i hardly knew
simply because he batted his pretty eyes

told me he would love me forever,
i was silly to believe those lies

when being honest means that i lose everything
its really ******* hard to actually do

but i had to tell the truth for real
and the truth baby, i think it made me lose you

once in a dream i saw your face
and longed to see that smile
once in a dream i heard your voice
and wished to hear it sing to me
once in a dream you held my hand
and i begged for our fingers to be intertwined
once in a dream you kissed me
and now i plead for those lips on mine
once in a dream you said three words
and i know they changed my heart

in reality you don't notice
my eyes that stare so earnestly
in reality you don't see
that i love who you are
in reality you would never care
that i fell for you in my dreams
in reality you don't even know me
and it breaks my heart
in reality i still love you
even if you never see me there.

As i walked the lengthy distance,
from the back row seat to the first.
I began to sense right then...
my project would be the worst.
Yet all the time i put in,
i figured I'd pass with a low B
and still as i walked that distance .
I knew it'd be a lower than a C...
listening as each person shared,
Their truly real short story...
i fidgeted and wiggled..
and really started to worry.
The teacher said to write
what came to mind.
Like childhood or family...
to make it one of a kind.
And yet somehow my mind still wandered
to a place still unknown...
i wrote about a womans death...
And how death had claimed the throne.
In English class i shared that project
in the front of that small space...
i read each word that i had typed,
not a syllable out of place.
When i was done my head was low,
i refused to meet their stare.
I sauntered back quietly
To my lonely back row chair.
It was then i saw my teacher smile
and simply nod his head,
it seems that my project was viewed
As a painful loss of the dead.
Little do they know,
i did not relate...
that story that i wrote...
was simply notes by my dinner plate...

i am in love i do believe
yet common sense
you can't perceive
i see that smile
it draws me close
medicate me
increase the dose
is it fiction
or is it fate
please close the doors
and lock the gate
am i dreaming
or is this real
all these emotions
i do not wish to feel
please numb the pain
and let me sleep
these dreams i dream
i want to keep
alcohol
the bitter ***
all i knew
has come undone
drink it in
or pour it out
all this "love"
i start doubt
is he my hero
or is he death
my sweet encounter
or my last breath
does he love me
or am i to blame
for letting him go
i                                        
never               ­             
knew                
his          
name

Getting drunk is a hobby
Taking shots a game
Forgetting everything
Including my name
Tequila and *****
And wine or ***
Drink it all
Till I come undone.

He asked me to stop
I promised to
Little does he know
I can drink for two
I down it
I take it in
Drink it all
This game I'll win.

I love the way
It makes me lose my mind
The feeling in my body gone
I have no need to be kind.
I feel nothing
Just like i always asked for
Honestly getting drunk
Has opened a new door.

His eyes truly were captivating
They somehow held every stare
His eyes held the world secrets
But how did they get there

I gazed into the great unknown
Within the depths of his eyes
Is it true that this is love
Or am i believing lies?

If he caught me starting
Would he simply look away
Or would he speak to me?
I wouldn't know what to say

I'd be at such a loss
If he approached me
I'd giggle and I'd blush
Hoping he wouldn't see

His eyes, Oh.. his eyes
They draw me near
They beckon and they call
They wash away all fear

How did it happen?
I usually seem to wonder
How did we forget the rain
Was it the lightening or the thunder

I'll be the lover
you can be the dreamer
that is all I know for sure

I am the hopeful
you are the rain
*that is all I see

lay with me, oh lay me down
touch me softly, kiss me slow
stepping out into the great unknown
hold me baby, touch me now

hand on my leg and hand in my hair
taste your sweat, our chests bear
breathe you in like the summer air
the sweetest, deepest love affair

your hands wander and travel freely
my nails scrape your back tenderly
searching for love through lust is the key
you found what you were looking for; me

I feel stranded on this island
And it feels so nice to be alone
I finally have no one to deal with
No one to please or love.
Because without him
I am stranded
But I'll send him a message
I'll put it in a bottle
I'll send it across the sea
It will read
"I hope you're thinking of me"
And when he opens it
He'll see my hand writing
And he will soon know
That if he wants me back
That island is where he should go.

And if he reads that message
And sighs in relief
Not missing me at all
I guess I'll be brief

My dear whom i love
Who doesn't need me
Can live life on his own
And i will be safe and sound
On that island
I will live a life full of adventure
And i may be alone
But i know I'm happy
Because he and i weren't meant to be
And i want no one else.

What he said:

You know i love you
You know i care
Please dont think
That im not there
We just need time
A little space
Slow it down
Ill set the pace
I know you love me
I know thats true
I really want
To be there for you
I broke your heart
Just in time
I swear you were
Going to break mine
I trusted you
you trusted me
Now please calm down
Ill set you free

What i heard:

You were simply
A summer fling
We had nothing
Not a little thing
We werent clicking
I think thats true
You fell for me
Not i for you
We held hands
I held you close
But it meant nothing
I hope you know
I said move on
And here we are
Why does my "love"
Leave a scar

I think I'm beggining to see what love is
I'm starting to grasp just how bad it hurts to let go
To see them happy is your world
That's all you really want to know
Someday you might meet again
And ask them how they are
And your heart will shatter completely
Because, they've made it so far
Yet right now, knowing that
I love him just that much
To let him go, no second thought
And slowly forget his touch
I'd give up every chance i had
To try this all again
But in the end he'd get hurt
We all know only one can win
I love him, that dork of mine
He is all I'll ever need
I loved him, through thick and thin
He wil always be MY dweeb
But I'd let that all slip away
I'd risk my own joy
To let him grow
To a strong man, from simple boy
I'll forever wonder
What we could've had
But being his once again
Do you think it'd be bad?
I love him unconditionally
I'd give him all he desired
Cause truly he is
The best guy I've ever acquired
Talk to me world
Should i set him free?
Let him move on?
Allow him to forget me.?