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Feb 2015 · 1.3k
My Worst Fear
Audrey Feb 2015
This friend I have is one I know
She would never want to go
Something's burning from inside
I can't bear to let it hide
Another moment, I fear the worst;
I decide to tell her first

Searching for courage, but it's tough;
I don't think I have enough
Finally, I say the words
Though every single sentence hurts
The fear is cutting through my bones
My heart is beating through my toes

After I have spilled it all
I look up and silence falls
She begins to grab her things
My fresh tears begin to sting
I reach my hand out for a touch
She flinches and says "You're ******* up"

I can't believe what I've just heard
But I remember every word
Clear as crystal inside my head
I'll be silent forever instead
I can't do this anymore;
I feel my heart slam shut its door

She ran fast away from me
She didn't even hear my scream
I kick, I cry, I pound my head
I can't believe I've lost my friend
This friend was one I thought I knew;
She walked out right on cue
This poem is literally about my biggest fear. I have had so many people leave me in my life that I can't truly open up to anyone and just be myself. I think that's why I actually really have no idea who I am yet.

I know this was a long poem. Thank you for taking the time to read it, if you did.
Feb 2015 · 1.1k
I am free
Audrey Feb 2015
I just want to be accepted
But I'm afraid I'll be rejected
If the real me is projected
Their opinions will be affected

I don't know why
I pay them mind
I need to find
Who I am,
Not who they want me to be

*I am me
I am crazy
I am free
Feb 2015 · 1.3k
Wish Upon a Star
Audrey Feb 2015
I wish upon a star so bright
That I may dream good dreams tonight

Whenever I turn off the light
I find I have nightmares in sight
I'm sick of death and fear and fright
I need to dream good dreams tonight

I try to live with all my might
But I don't know if I can fight
I might not last another night
If I don't dream good dreams tonight

I wish upon a star so bright
That I may dream good dreams tonight
I don't like how it made "tonight" its own line in the second and last lines of the poem. It's not supposed to be that way... It needs to be read as if it's on the same line in order to keep the flow of the poem.
Feb 2015 · 1.2k
Drowning
Audrey Feb 2015
I need to escape this vile emotion
But my brain is a deep blue ocean
I keep swimming towards the surface
But up is down, and I have no purpose
My lungs are screaming, my head is pounding,
And I realize - *I am drowning
Feb 2015 · 823
I Cry
Audrey Feb 2015
I am dizzy
                                                          ­                 Dizzy from despair
                                  *I am tired

Tired of despair
                                                         ­  I cry

I am full
                                                           ­                Full of loneliness
                                  I am sick
Sick of loneliness
                                                      ­     I cry

I look happy
                        But really
                                           I am not
                                                           I cry
Feb 2015 · 476
Beauty
Audrey Feb 2015
Society defines beauty as perfection, but
I am here to submit a correction
This newly improved definition states:
Beauty is found in the thing that deviates
Deviates from the code that is implied, not written
The code that is followed, even by children

Real beauty is sometimes hidden
Look for the thing that's a little bit different
The thing that breaks society's norm
The one that takes the path unworn
Like the crazy color of your hair
Or the freckles you have everywhere

We each have something unique and wonderful
Which makes every one of us truly individual
Not one person is a copy of another
Yet in one word I could define us together:
*beautiful
I absolutely hate when society tells young girls they have to wear makeup, or that boys have to have a perfectly sculpted body to be "hot"

The other day, my six year old cousin told me that she hates herself because she's "fat"... SHE IS NOT. She only said it because she hears her mom call herself fat all the time.

IS THIS WHAT WE'RE TEACHING OUR CHILDREN?

Rant over. Thank you for reading ♥
Feb 2015 · 2.3k
Happiness
Audrey Feb 2015
Happiness is a lie
Everyone is sad inside
Maybe you don't realize, but
Even you are sad inside

Your demons may crawl down to hide
And in that moment, you are fine
You might even crack a smile
But demons are demons and after a while
They come back to make you cry

And cry you will, because
Everyone is sad inside
Feb 2015 · 550
Who Am I?
Audrey Feb 2015
Who am I?
I am outgoing, but
I am shy
I am smart, but
I am afraid
I am pretty, but
I am ugly
I am passionate, but
I am numb
I am me, but
I am not
Who am I?

Sometimes,
I hate myself.
Other times,
I love myself
All the time,
I'm pretending

Pretending for parents
Pretending for friends
Pretending for everyone
The pretending never ends
I even pretend for me
Who am I?*
I do not know
Feb 2015 · 549
I am
Audrey Feb 2015
I am hollow and afraid
I wonder - do they see my pain?
I hear echoes of the rain
the downpour inside my brain
I see the drops falling down
I want to stop them, but
I am hollow and afraid

I pretend I am fine, but
I feel very far from fine
I run my fingers through my hair
I fear judgement, everywhere
I cry inside, but only there, for
I am hollow and afraid

I know they say "life is a wonder"
I say life is a four-letter-word
I dream of death, desolation, disaster
I just want it all to end, because
**I am so hollow, and so afraid
Feb 2015 · 1.1k
Falling in Love
Audrey Feb 2015
His hands run through her hair
Their clothes are everywhere
Discarded in passion's haste
His hands meet her waist
A sigh of joy fills the room
He smells a breath of her perfume
Their lips part for a moment in time
He looks into her deep blue eyes
And as he gazes from above
He suddenly finds
*He has fallen in love

— The End —