This I find the truth
Can't write a poem while sneezing
It will turn hai-choo

The muse died
I put a stake through her heart
Put her in the ground

She will no longer
**** away my sleep
Trade my time for trinkets of rhyme

I left her
In an unmarked grave
So soon to be forgotten

She will no longer
Rise at first moon
To haunt my memories

Like a simple twist of fate
She looked astonished
The first blow upon the stake

I dust off my hands
And lay my shovel down
I'm going home

I will lay down
And go back to sleep
all within my ease

But before I do
I'll throw another poem
Upon the towering stack

Eight minutes and twenty seconds
From the Sun to my eye
186 thousand miles per second
Faster than a blink can go "bye"

All reflections , wherever you turn
Are dangling particles of the past
     "As you sped away you threw your last kiss goodbye as my heart approached the speed of sorrow ."
      And all time came to a standstill ,
as the past fled away so fast

Fire !

so it goes with anger

a ballerina

the forest

or my Catilina when she is jealous

for the moth

it is the gate to eternity

but for the wise moth

the secret to life

is to come back

with singed wings

Brickering words
The sand of sentences
Added to the waters of time
Cemented into the ever evasive desires of heart

What fools expect and deserve are written on the walls and heart of poets

. . . and they know it

With an evening breeze
lifting your hair to rise
Leaving your smile on lips
I lose my disguise

Follow the twilight
twinkling fireflies
using shadows to hide
Peeping pixies go sigh

I love your undulation ,
thoughts are accerbating
The notions turn into touch
Your crush so embracing

You wore cherry flavored
lipstick head to toe
To this feat my tongue
was to be in the know

We embraced
in moon mountain time
Saving starshine sparkles like
Diamondhead of the mind

Tumble weeds grow fast in spring
Shoot straight up true and green

Turn brown fast in desert's heat
The wind breaks free , gives them feet

Then they roll long , and roll on free
Across the plains and prairies

Just ghosts of life gone by
Of those who have never answered why

All the reasons of love denied
All the times before death it died

Roll **** across the winter's cold
Roll on endlessly bare bones bold

Roll on away from love
Rave on to God above

Let nothing touch your hollow heart
Let nothing change your immortal soul

I found a lingering thought
you left behind . . .
      dried blood , sinews and
a bottle of unkempt time .

Though they tried to stamp you out . . . Atomic has an edge when it comes to hot fallout .

They may have pound and beat the desk . . . but they take their place with all the rest .

Still you live beyond the glass and stone . . . everytime someone sings one of your songs .

The rose wood rose up in flames . The steel wires popped from the strain .

And all in silence watched refrained . . . as another star dimned and left us pained .

They fall far , they fall hard
They leave stained and ***** feathers
Some soaked in tar

Their kisses form shallow
Their embraces colored weak

Their hearts are shredded
Their pulse timid
Barely a beat

Love has been cruel
A diversion in pain at best

Little did they know that
When they flew
From the nest

Now broken and battered
No longer good of wing

They perform as requested
Or chance another
Beating

All of their tomorrows lay in powdered dust
Nothing to hold onto

No children , photograps , ring  
Nothing
Except the next man's ******

So I begged and pleaded
and plucked the weeds
I waited for something
to answer to my needs

But the silence of winter's
snow softly fell
There was no echo rising
from my empty well

I looked up
with pleading eyes
Only to find icy
brow and lies

Wasn't even asking
for space on the shelf
What less selfishness
must I do to prove myself

Thus the carrot dangles
from from the stick
Telling me to prepare
for the coming kick

Amen

I open up your letter
and I read your every word
I found them quite unsettling
for it was just yesterday
That they put you in your grave

Should I keep these empty pages ?
After all now you have gone
*** MARKED FOR A MAKEOVER
"I can change and bring you
a brand new beautiful song ."

But your chorus has been depleted
There are no more a capellas
The voice of the turtle will remain mute
As you prefered living inside your bony shell


Then I said to you , "Now do I really give a hoot ?"


So I threw your letter into the can
That's where the trash belongs
I know I will never forget you
With that thought I will be moving on

I was just thinking about you
After all these many years ago
Thinking about how much I still love you
How I just let you go

Life is sometimes a fountain
Sometimes I was just a fool
There is a pool of sorrow
Full of precious jewels

I can't help think of what might have been
What would have happened
Had I accepted your open invitation
imagining what could have been

With my life nearly over
I sheded love like autumn sheds her leaves
And I have my mountains of regret
and eternity to grieve

Still I see you sitting prettily
I guess you will always be twenty three
And I will be an epic of love lost
A fire still burning within me .

Unleash the arrow from your bow
I'm hanging by a string you know

The anger's bent you nearly in two
Your rationality has lost it's due

Cast me not across the sky
It will only leave you asking why

Put me back into your quiver
Where we can again be birds of a feather

We all stumble , falter and fall
No more than the dust after all

We rant , pretend or rave
But there are no words coming from the grave

Our time is spent whether we pay
Our lives granted a fixed number of days

How many full moons caught your eye
Now you are asking me "Why?"

Don't you see all of it is in vain
Brings us back to the quesion of dust again

The answer my friend ?
It's blowing in the wind



Last stanza by Robert Zimmerman aka Bob Dylan .

You can collect all the loves
in your past life
and store them in your heart
and have one giant heartache

Love is like hugging a porcupine as tight as you can while it pierces your heart through

My black days spill over
white hot
full of sparks that burn instantly
Monocast in hearts
Ductile to life's incessant blows of futility
Black days dance
fluid in regidity
My black days consume me
Take me to the place
where the past , the present , and the future become one eternity

Yeah ,
you shiver in the dark
Your shadow hugs you tight
As in the meantime

You get a colored drink
In a crowded bar
Where you are nobody
Nobody is your name

The band is Dixie
line 'em up and down
Four time and rhyme
Loud !Loud ! Loud !

The pixies ply
you for their drinks
Sluring filthy things
You cain't help but crack a smile

There are
white breasted women
stepping up to the microphone
Sing ! Sing ! Sing !

The hour is getting late
Looking for a mate
So you slip off
a golden ring

Competition is ways and mean
Way down on southside
When they play under the lights
On Friday nights

The pen and my paper
my Lord and my Savior
Still all my days
remain so dark

Black blood , red ink
The thoughts on the brink
The sponge soaks up pain
Called my heart

The window and the glass
The curtain and the sash
There is no relief
On either side

I don't know how life became what it is
Sometimes it let's me go so down

I pound on the door
It won't open any more
The agony ending days
Remain unsealed

The blue of the sky
Just makes me want to cry
The emptiness of the void
scares me . . . to death

Volumes of paper
Each page my forsaker
My life is there
For all to see

One wears the wages of sin
As war's protecting bibs
Where arrowheads of flight
Cannot pierce the pump within

Taste the salt upon the sea
The sea where sins are drowned
Upon the hearts that sit on sleeves
The head of smiles we crown

Back across the cross we bear
Hear the pounding of the condemned
Perhaps we will never be more
Than the crown of thorns we wear

So the cherry tree has fallen
It's bark black with disease
Lime should cure the problem
I will be planting trees

the rays of light , first past night
A rooster of a red bull dawn
penetrating my space making place
in my mind , my heart , and soul

got a messenger on my mail
saying , you have a point to nail
the distance between is shadow thin
and in silence you're assailed

Oh , no ! for there is no assurance
between the bookends afterglow
over a sea of promisses drowned
flys the arrow's revenge far from the bow

the required 1% , not evident
blood be drawn , sacrifice made
to tease your foul reasoning
embryo was to the point purely all ******

Now as afterthought was hollow grave
as you lay love's carcass down
cover it with time's wasted words
of a distance that was only shadow thin

You always had that fire
burning in your eyes
Life's force flowed
through your veins
So vibrant , so alive

You had a laugh
that rocked the boat
You made the difficult
into a joke

So I was unprepared
to find you there
Laying still as if asleep

I studied every wrinkle
upon your face
But I could find no trace
of the you
I used to know

I sighed
with the loss of an age
I had come to find
the very last page

Peace was so unbefitting
of the manor I knew
You would be so
unapproving of the show

I came to say goodbye
but you were not there
Instead I found you
in the sunset of my dreams
that night when I looked
up into the stars

When a man takes away
the innocence of a girl
he leaves her
as  a woman
of age and knowledge

You on the bridge
don't have to feed me
YOU tugging on my sleeve
don't have to grieve for me

Let it go
You heard me
I am not your sympathy
So let it go !

LET IT GO !

Don't come over here
Keep it out of my way
Your cheer is leer
So go make you dark energy lay

Go away !

The sounds of sorrow :
soft whimpers under covers
late , late on a cold winter's night

Low moans of eternal pain
that one has tried to turn
into  . . ."I forgot"

Long wails that are full
of fury and devastation
as a hurricane's whip cracks

The heart that has been
kicked and stomped
and stabbed to froth

Flipping pages of poetry
fanning the heat
of discourse

Long sighs
sitting in a swing
looking down . . .coughs

Hearing what other's think
what they say
in silence

The scrape of a mental shovel
digging deeper
trying to bury the past

Oh ! Of course !
the frustration of deliberations
throwing and shattering glass

Yelling in a canyon
but there are no echoes
bouncing back

The ******* sound
made from a razorblade
that is in your mouth

and then silence

If you didn't speak Spanish
I think I would call you up
They all say your crazy
hmm . . . just maybe crazy enough
Her life is a disaster
just waiting like
a grenade to go on off
Maybe we could play spin the bottle
inhale . . . cough cough cough
Or go for long walks downtown
She can bring her Glock
Or ride up to the reservoir
have a pinic and feed the ants
Or go see a movie , hold hands
while we get stuck to the floor
Or maybe yet
Go to the county fair
Oh yeah !
They closed it down last year
Well (my favorite word)
I just might text a word to you
Let's get together on the line
DING ! wow ,
I have a message now from you

At seven ,
I rode a bicycle
with over inflated tires
that burst in the dark
thumping hard the side
of the house
scaring us all

At eleven ,
I went to three
different elementaries
in two states ,
one fall ,
two winter ,
three spring

When thirteen ,
I had a home
with no roof
or walls and slept
under the wiles of
mother moon

Then at fourteen ,
at fifteen ,
and sixteen ,
I went to high school
in a house made
out of cards
The jokers ran wild

At seventeen ,
I moved on
moved out
and like an orphan
I was sponsored
without love
as a rock singing
"I Am A Rock"

" 'I have my books
   And my poetry to protect me
   I am shielded in my armor
   Hiding in my room
   Safe within my womb
   I touch no one and no one touches me
   I am a rock
   I am an island

   And a rock feels no pain
   And a rock never cries ' "

She embraces me in chill
Comforts me with her will

Touches my heart in kisses
Twisting in the seditious

Her sadness blankets my heart
Her beauty right on mark

For she has stars in her eyes that haunt me
Her compassion reaps all sea to sea

I am married to the night
My Angel of delight

The vacant space upon times ethereal shores
Has me asking if Odysseus has ever touched before ?

The waves lapping , swirling sands across my feet
Leaves me little gold that I might keep

The thistle and thorns woven into a crown to wear
Placed upon with such gentle care

The shores all rock and cliff so high
How can I just climb on by?

Moments are dark , the sea will free
Come follow to the ends with me

The Isle is small just temporal best
Back home from a ten year's quest

He wades the shores and falls to knees
She bends down to claim his ease

They embrace the winds of time
That binds them to the threads of mind

She was love
feathers on a dove
She was adorned
as yellow on corn
She was thirst
a river clear
She was sky
the air I breathe
She was peace
beyond the stars
She was silence
That rests the heart
She was beyond
even in imagination
She was wise
and knew I would cry
She was ready
subdued her fear
And when at last breath
She was no more

Ran out of hugs
Ran out of kisses
Ran out of loving

That's
the way it always goes
I am just led to superimpose

There is a way
that the sun
glows gold

There is a cup
that will overflow

There is a good moon
rising
just before the dawn

An owl that
doesn't give a Hoot
out on the lawn

A broken heart that
no amount of kintsugi
and gold
will fill the canyons
of cracks and
eliminate the epicanthic soul
.
epicanthic - a prolongation of the upper eyelid that partially blocks the inner corner eyesight .

I ran with the fleet footed
only to be left ever so far far behind

I sat with the quick witted
only to find out we are not of the same kind

I prayed with the most religious so devout that only for God had they any time


I am a tent maker
I fiddle as I so please
I am at ease with my maker
He says bless you
every time that I sneeze


I am never at ease with one or many many more
I guess it was that surprise punch to the gut so I am always looking out there for more

I make friends only slowly
But I'm quick to let go
I live where there is found soot on the surface of snow

I have a family but only by blood . My son lives in Boston
My sister died in Orlando

I exist in my nowhere in the middle of my state
Just waiting on circumstance
so someday I can escape


"I am what I am and that's all that I am"
That's what Popeye would be sure to often say
Of course that is considered now to be so passe


If all of the I's in "if" were unbound I think more people would be willing
to stand for their ground

But when the "f" is surrounded by words I think it has people thinking they have fallen down

So I will end now
I really must go
I will get back to you
As sure as the sun
melts the soot on the snow

I forgot what BTW stands for . . .
. . . between the wines ?
Oh yeah ! . . . by the way !
Yes !

Too much of yesterdays
and hangover today
Oh yes enough to **** a teenager

Once you start questioning your poetry
you'll be listening to teenagers ,
"You are not using rhyme !"
"Your muse is a dummy ."

You don't write poetry . . . your muse does
Your just the leaky pen
Or in my case the timid typist

First mistake :
Listening to other people
tell you how to write

Second mistake :
Self doubt
Who in the world cares if your poetry
is good or bad  . . . that is not
the point anyway

You don't write to please the Queen
You write to no one out there
who might be listening

You write to the shadows
You write to the physical ghosts
that never existed

It is not your purpose to write
anything that pleases anyone else
Yes is best

Just write and write to your hearts delight
Poetry is measured by years
not by the poem . . . bye now

I said I love you in the rain
I said I love on the train
I said I love you over and over
          again and again
Till I turned blue from pain

I want to make love to a poetess
To caress her perfect metaphors

I want to taste her salty vowels
To embrace her nouns with care

I wish to kiss the lips of rhyme
Spread the legs of time

I long to lay on her haiku
Watch her image shine

I long to watch the ****** unfold
As each poem penatrates

Then we will complete an ode to love
As we watch the endings mate

The loneliest sunset
The cold with a chill

The link between night . . . day
Dark and nil

The chain that is life
Fused into links with death

Desolving into
A meaninglessness



Happiness and sadness
Go hand and paw

Frozen stiff now
Too cold to thaw

Bye , bye ,
My once sweet soul

Once so frisky
Always so bold

May you journey
Forever on

Because time won't
Break our eternal bond

You have a kind muse .
My muse is over there ,
bemused at my insolence ,
never to be trusted .
She will say anything to embrace me
and laughs like a witch .
We fought one night
and I killed her .
Buried her in a shallow grave ,
went home and threw
another poem on the stack .
There was a knock later
and I opened the door
and my muse was standing there .
She spit dirt in my face ,
and we fought again and voila . . .
another poem goes on the stack .

No I will never forget you
Even if I were to try
You are the just one
That made my heart to fly

I dreamed that I could hold you
Sleep soundly in your dreams
Tell you that I love you
That my love went beyond all of my means

You call me your uncle
I could be your grandfather now by age
You are lost in the first chapter
I am found in the back
On the very last sentence of the page

You say I will stop loving you
That this day is written in the stones
If the stones speak the truth then
They speak standing on my grave

So  kiss me goodbye forever
Hug me , this is the final time
I have a comet now to catch
I don't wan't to lose my ride

.
.
.
Tucked away

   down deep


    buried under pages of memories



under folds of aging grey/gray cells



where we put them when no one was looking



then we piled days upon days on top of them



until one by one they became forgotten




like the names etched on stone in the forest of monuments



such are the secret sorrows that go to the grave with us
.
.
.
and only God knows

2 mother's die from complications of
   childbirth
4 children are killed by abuse or
    neglect
6 children or teens commit suicide
7 children's or teens are killed by
   guns
21 children or teens die from
      accidents
41 children or teens are injured or
      killed with a gun
65 babies die before their first
      birthdays
167 children are arrested for violent
        crimes
 384 children are arrested for drug
         crimes
 690 babies are born to teen mothers
 874 babies are born at low
         birthweights
 927 public school students are
         corporally punished
1,151 babies are born into extreme
           poverty
1,345 babies are born without health
            insurance
1,903 children are confirmed as abused
            or neglected
2,315 babies are born into poverty
2,857 high school students drop out
3,617 children are arrested
4,396 babies babies are born to
            unmarried mothers
12,816 public school students are
            suspended

Time stands still for no man

Stop the train ! I want to get off !
If I can't be anything more
Then let me scold and let me scoff
Please now just open up the door

Your pretentious pretensions
Pause and place me inbetween
Take your dreams and nightmares too
I see the truth there in your gleam

Let me off at the next stop , please !
Just let me debark from this strife
I have no need of solicitations
From the perpetrators in my life

Just back away from your misgivings
Keep them all for yourself
I have no use for the falsehoods
So put your book back on the shelf

Once so true
Once so pure
Accosted in the temple
***** and pummeled
Then blamed for sure

Cursed , shamed , then disdained
Banished , exiled away
To spend all her days
alone without a say
Medusa the castaway

I'll be the last man standing by you
All the others lying dead afield

I am the only survivor to you
I'm the only reason you remain real

I'll be the last man to love you
I'll be the last man you kiss

There will be no one between us
There's no one you will miss

Help me ! Help me !
You know me better than I know myself

Take me ! Take me !
To that all special place

I'll be your last man naked
I'll be your unmasking

I will leave your body shaking
Make you beg for more

I will be your comet rising
Come and ******* pleasure

I'll be your last man standing
Watch me more than measure

I don't know if you do
have trouble writing poetry at HP like I do
It's hard enough to stay on page
It jumps like jack rabbits caught in a hailstorm on the Texas sage
Then it will suddenly disappear only to turn stone cold sober as it has done year after year
The "Who's On" floods my screen .
Even ignores my command to go it seems
It's supposed to scroll not stroll across the page
Just wondering if others share my rage

I came to a fork in the road
and I got spooned .

I ran the race so I could win
But only lost before I won
I crossed the line to be the first
But came in last in every way
You don't have a clue as to know about what I have to say
Just remember that when you have done it all
There's nothing left  
except to pass away

My sunset is just a memory away
A faded thought of light to say

I find I've lost
at such a cost

With the seconds in thought
By the minute
I have to pay

The hours were dull
The days the same

The years flew bye
To my dreadful shame

I love to embrace
the final light

But my home is in
the calm of night

I just discovered I've been passive-aggressive all my life !

Whatever !

Dark knights
on white satin
With pumice for breath
Exact the toll that tells

I cut my heart out
Placed it on display
I get much sympathy that I
throw down my endless well

It's bitter , the wine
It's better than time
I will out to find
a curse that binds

"I" falls off the tongue's challenge
Captured and caged
I send notice to the page
Now that the cat's captured the rage

So it comes down to the season of reason
I am reluctant to part ways
Pray thee write a poem on my behalf
That I will exist beyond these days .

You can't lie like you used to
Your eyes do give you away
So your going out for something
On this bright and beautiful day
But I have known for a long time
Another heart has stolen you away
It grieves me so but what can I say or do
When you're making me feel so blue
And it hurts to see you lie to me
When once we were so close
So go . . . go on. . . now be on your way
Your heart sheds not a ray for me
The Sun burns the face of the moon
And leaves wasted traces of love
I'll be on the darkest side in grief
Where I wish the stars above