It is not that loathsome sin of murmuring
That I am constantly loathing
It’s the fact that I’m not praising

The trail comes but I cover my eyes
And grit my teeth to bare the lies
Instead of fixing them on the one who hears my cry’s

I was in a dream
Or so it seemed
I was in a River
And I heard a sound that made me quiver
It was the call
Of a water fall
Or rather a roar
That shook me to the core
And I tried to fight the current
But I was caught in the torrent  
So what could I do?
Then someone who knew
Called from down below
“My dear fellow!”
“Just let the water take you”
“But I will be pummeled?!”
I shouted above the rumble
“You shall be bruised but the water will push you through”
“I know this because I went through”
So I let off from from the fight
And woke up in the light
Twas merely a dream
But this mirrored my life it seamed
For struggles were full in me
But it was He
The one too whom I bend my knee
Was the one who put me here
And because of his care
Brought the torrent
That was to me abhorrent
But it was for my good
And now I understood
That was for my betterment
God the trial had sent

Target of His Holy wrath
blinded we bathed in sin like it was a bath
Full destruction was to be the after math
Yet Christ saw this complex problem
And he saved those the law did condemn
As though that was not enough he chose me to partake as one of them
What grace is this
That I am now seen in his righteousness

What form of art do I chose today?
Is music my way
or shall I paint the suns golden ray
Nay
I think I shall write today

Heartache
Heart break
Can you just love for loves sake
You asked for a break
But this smile I can’t continue to fake
Remember at the lake
You promised the ring to take
I had thoughts of a wedding cake
But you left me and said it was a mistake
For pity sake
Don’t let my heart break

How is it that I can't say what I feel
Words are just not as real
I don't want to say I love you
but hell I like bein with you

remember when we met
it was like it was meant to be
you and me was all that I could see
But I guess forever isn't as long as it should be

Don’t say good bye
with me forever lye
At least till the dawn is nye
For the moon is still high
And shall you leave me to die
It is here in the darkness I will cry
don’t say goodbye
with me forever lye
till time passes by and by

I am not a wine
That gets better with time
I have not a dime
But I do have a question that makes the last line
Will you be mine

The beat was our hearts
We both new our parts
She was the melody, sweet and vibrant
I was the harmony, strong and steady
Even when we were silent
We made a perfect melody

Being Lonely
is just me longing for you
Together we were lovely
But what am I if we don't make two

Through a child’s eyes
All wickedness dies
The world is filled with lies
But through a child’s eyes
Everyone has second tries

Look at me
Tell me what you see
All failures arise
But wait...
Can you see me through a child’s eyes

Forgive me for my deeds
Let me sow new seeds
Sorry I have so many needs
But I am not fit to lead
But through child’s eyes

They met in the dark
Not sure what it was when they felt the spark
Wild eyed and young
It was a love song they sung
Cupids arrow made its mark
On heir harts he put his lock
That was till he forgot his promise
He had a moment of weakness
She had so much to say but couldn’t talk
The other simply stood to mock
Their love seemed to have been

I don’t want a story
But it has already been written
For your own glory
And thou dost know where it fits in

But I’m finite in my sight
And cannot see the plot
But I must read by your light
And with out you, my life would be not

Torn in soul
This fire burns hotter than coal
A decision I must make
Lord guid the steps I have to take

Oh rejoice my soul
Sing praise to the one who brought you into his fold
Oh be now bold
Sing again the gospel story you were told

They say a picture is worth a thousand words
But with a single word I can paint on the canvas of your imagination a vivid picture that a painter could never compose

When your head left my shoulder
The light left my heart
I felt colder
this is what its like when we’re apart
As I get older
I realize with a start
That to leave you just tears me apart

Oh sing to the Lord of his gracious mercies that he has bestowed on us! Life and salvation from his holy! Where there grater sinners than us? Are there rebels so evil as  I that would rebel against a King who did give them life and sustains every minute of there wretched existence! He did offer time and again peace and new spiritual life and yet this wretch refused his gracious hand. But in his might he did beat down my defenses of pride and self worship he crushed my self righteous and made me watch as he demonstrated my frailty and utter lack of control. Then with no choice of my own he bent my neck and I worshiped my God! He again extended his scepter of mercy and by his opening of my eyes I saw my wickedness! My evil was laid before me and I worshiped! Then he did pick me up from the ashes of my depravity and with his Spirit in me I repeated of all my wicked ways and walk in the footsteps of his precious Son my God and my Lord! Oh sing Oh sing! How shall my lips ever cease to utter his praises and extol the Lord of my Salvation!? Thank you my Lord my God for humbling I who was the pinnacle of pride and depravity! Oh fellow saints worship the one who has made us alive in his righteousness! Let us now live as he did for the sole purpose of bringing glory to God our Father! Let us love as he did the church and did humble himself to a life of poverty, shame, servitude so that he might die the cursed death of crucifixion and bear her sins and punishment! Let us pray as he did for our Fathers will to be established forever! All glory be to Him!

Oh how wicked is my sin bent heart
Daily should it be struck through with a dart
For when it is not crucified it does dart
To the sin, for which my savior was pierced through the heart!

Oh let me not be so fickle my Lord
Let me ever stumble backward
For yet a little slumber I can not afford
Else my poverty shall be the reward

Let it not be I who blasphemy’s by doing that which my Savior
did died for
You have given me a way therefore
help me walk by the strength which is yours
Oh this prayer do not ignore!

So, let I pray thee, your servant never slumber
Let me not rest from good labor
Rather provoke me, as a good father to your work evermore
If weary I shall rest in thee

Every day help me put to death the pride that be sets me
It is I who doth fight against my self!
I surrender it to you my farther!
Give the victory as you have promised

Not for my glory!
For I know it is not on my own that I even have this desire
But so others might see your glory reflected in this shattered mirror!
Then they shall glorify you!
And all magnification shall be yours!

Oh my God so let it be!

Should I suggest a dance
Would you let me have the chance?

Should I give you my shoulder
would you snuggle closer?

Should I advance
Would you except the romance?

But not yet for the time is not right
But not yet for my sight is not right
But if I said not yet would you sit tight?
For the thing I want most is to kiss you good night

But I can not say this for you might fall for me
And I don’t want to lead you on
But don’t leave yet… at least till dawn
For I long for this to be
But the end I can not see

So again my words fall short
and so again the mission I abort

I’m sorry I didn’t last
But let this remind you
Life passes fast
You’re just brand new
This is how God had it cast
I’m sorry my days are so few

I’ll never know your sweet smile
I wish I could stay to see you grow
But to stay a little while
I wrote this so you would know
That the thought of you makes me smile
Sorry I have to go

Oh baby I’m sorry
But I hate when you call me
Pretend I’m not really here
Or anywhere near

Oh girl why you keep callin
I told you already I’m not really fallin
In love with you
Yeah your friends think you’re cool
But now your just being a fool

Sorry... I’m not in love with you

I got Tim’s on my feet
As I watch the fire consume the wood
Like the depression burning in my soul

I can feel the heat
If I could vanish like the smoke I would
Why does life seem so dull?

I wish this feeling I could defeat
Thinking on better things, I know I should
But sad things is what now has rule

I am addicted to music
Sounds strange but for me it’s therapeutic
The beat must be solid
The lyrics must be valid
And I usually like a good ballad

Dear mother dear father
I’m sorry to bother
I said my goodbyes
But I don’t want to say bye to you

My memories grows fonder
Each time I ponder
My memories with you

So I’m writing this song
To ask you to keep the light on
Just while I’m gone
Its so hard to say
But they say it’s this way
The bird leaves the nest
To face all his tests...        alone

Dear brother dear sister
You’re both but a youngster
Everyone cries
You’ll grow up faster than you know

The fights I remember
And how in December
We howled at the moon

I’m writing this song
To ask you to keep the light on
Just while I’m gone... Okay
Its so hard to say
But they say it’s this way
The bird leaves the nest
To face all his tests...        alone

Dearest family
Gather round me
Though I’m leaving today
I’ll be back one day
So keep the light on
And sing this sweet song
To remember... oh remember!

to keep the light on
Just while I’m gone

Its so hard to say
But they say it’s this way
The bird leaves the nest
To face all his tests...        alone

No matter what they ask
No matter how they pry
Don’t try
Don’t ware a mask

I learned that to lie to another
You must first lie to yourself
If indeed you want to put truth on the shelf
Yourself you mustn’t smother

To believe a lie is hard
You must be cool
That’s truly the only rule
But you will be marred

For then you make it a habit
For to lie
Is for truth to die
But I guess that’s the point of it

There’s a bright silver lining to every storm cloud
There’s a hope in the sky when the rains pouring down
The sun will soon shine if we just hang around
And I’ll love you forever
Even when the rains pourin down

Had a dream we made love
But I knew it was a dream
For you are from above
And if you tried even I you could not redeem

They say I’ll always find my way home
But I’m still alone
I found not all roads lead back home
Flesh and bone
Can only roam
Sorry for the sad tone
But I’m missing home

I can’t remember since I was sober
Missing you feels like I was hit with a crowbar
You where my north star
You gave me direction when you sang
And I played my guitar
But those memories are so far
So can you bring them back in your car

Can you come over
I feel hung over
Just hold me till it’s over
Red rover red rover send sorrows on over

You can put your head on my chest
I’ll apologize sorry for the tempest
You know your the best
But only when you’re with me can I rest
So will you come over before the sun ends it's journey west?

Storm clouds and trees
Birds and bees
Meadow with a breeze
Violent winds on stormy seas
All people see these
But only do poets turn into seeds
For others to turn into deeds
But what will you do with what a poet feeds?
And another reads
Will you take heed?

Two birds flew above the steeple
Below were two people
This I saw through a peephole
And they were together made one soul
Never would another moment be dull
For in themselves were they made whole
But no one knows how the future will unroll
But I hope there love lasts longer than normal
For I know under pressure even coal
Can be transformed into something beautiful
So can two normal people be made to be something remarkable

I can’t explain the feeling
I can’t pen what I am thinking
It’s to hard to explain
It’s not a pain
But I have this aching
Happiness is what I’m faking

I was told this is called loneliness
And others describe it as an emptiness
But in truth it cannot be told
It is only a feeling one must hold
For how long is unknown
And it will last for as long as I am alone

It’s sparked by thoughts
When reading Shakespeare plots
For it makes me wish I had a companion
Who I would never abandon
But I will never know
For on it’s own love doesn’t grow
And it also can only be experienced
Which I will only ever see, for I am distanced

Sorry to bring down those who have love
But this is to relate to those who have none to speak of
And with that I am back to the beginning
There is no real way expressing this feeling

She fell for the face
She was in love with the feeling
She was only there for the chase
She wasn’t even aware of the real thing
But now she knows how pain tastes
It wasn’t her fault for dealing
She was just out of place
Now she’s staring at the ceiling
For I left without a trace
Sorry I lost feeling

Every one needs someone
Even if it’s just themselves
But I need someone
Who needs more then themselves
For I can not continue to run
Where loneliness dwells

The road is like the sea
If you don’t have a corse set
Who knows where you’ll be
That’s why I fret
For one day you’ll want to see
Then you’ll forget
And we will never be
So is it sand that our names are set
Or is our story in the stars for all to see?

Stay with me
Just long enough for me to see
That you truly love me
Sorry I’m needy
But I want more than your pity
I need you to love me
I guess that’s the key
But only you could unlock me
So stay with me
Just long enough for me to see
That you do truly love me

The closer people are the more they break each other...

If this was the last day of my life
I would say I’ve wasted life
A youth am I
And yet I know death is close by
Day by day life and time walk by
They never say hi
They just let you sleep
And later reap
What you have sown
They know I am flesh and bone
And that my life is a vapor
And I am as fragile as paper
But throughout these few years
I have increased my fears
For each day I forget
That my years are set
And I might not add nor subtract
So from now on I must always act
Never fall slack
For if I do I’ll fall back
Never gain
Anything but pain
So I must forget the past
Make the present last
And with the future in mind
Work hard so I might find
A full life without wast
And win this difficult race
That I have been set to face
And win this race I have been set to face

She said open up
So I did for I trusted
But then she said shut up
Now I am busted

What words of comfort my I give?
I know not your pain
Your life I have not lived

I know not what to say
I cannot promise it will be better
For I know not how your troubles are arrayed

So again I ask what words shall I utter
To a man or a woman in the midst of struggles?
I would merely stutter

But I will go to them
I will sit in silence and hold them
And do my best to help a friend

I used to speak my mind
But I was always losing it
Now I keep it in
But now no one knows me

Reach but you shall not attain
The glory of a great writer
Never will I gain
For I write but I am not a writer
So I only feign
And now I weep for I can not be a writer
All my work is mundane
But I desire to be a writer
And will continue to go through the pain
Though I will never reach the hight’s of a writer
I will go until I wane though all call me insane
All to be a writer
All to be a writer

My life what a pitiful site
My words what a bland write
My mind what a muddled thing
My heart what a sorrowful being
My hands what tools of mischief
My life how brief