I packed my clothes
I'm moving to the South.
I always romanticized the North East,
And North West but the middle seemed draining and sure, I'm scared. I'm bound by my youth here and I have this exaggerated passion to travel I decorate for the sake of feeling adventurous but I'm actually comfortable with my feet in concrete boots, climbing back to you. You asked if I'm happy and said that it's sad that I'm leaving, we have so many memories. I felt the same way a year ago with you so I said I didn't know if I was. I don't know if waking up every day past noon to down a pill just to leave the room is happy but I know I'll live three miles from the Atlantic ocean, from pink sand in three weeks and you know I always romanticized the way nature could heal a shattered soul, so I'll go.
I hate that you asked me if I'm happy right before I go, I hate that I'm over you but that still make my insides coagulate and tear apart my stomach lining, I hate that I'm lying about why I'm leaving.
I said I'm starting over but I just have some things I haven't let go of, and I can't. So I'm running from them instead. I'll live on the beach. You won't pop up in the coffee shops I pretend to like dark roast in. I won't see your face in public when you aren't really there. It's unfair that I don't know how to go anywhere but towards another person but I'm hoping those morning beach walks might teach me how to go towards something scary instead of something safe. Maybe happiness isn't safety, maybe when you said you missed me that pain in my stomach was irony because a year ago I collapsed in class on a white tile floor when you said you'd never love me the same and now I'm leaving behind white walls and a white door I never painted because I never picked a color that made me happy.
There's something about you,
That makes me feel blue,
But not in a bad way just I haven't a clue,
If your feelings for me is as true,
As you once told me before I said, "I love you too".
But I do,
And if you do too,
Then tell me how I can get through,
Because sayang you're the one who knows me as well as you,
You're the only one for me, boo,
You and me, we're a crew of two.
Laying on the sofa
Chewing on jelly beans
Dribbling my legs
Thumbs drifting around
Laziness consuming me.
Bored. I knew this sleepover would be boring. But I just didn't want to be stuck in my house.
Listening to snorts
Of the little Chihuahua.
My friend sprawling on the bed
Me rustling on the sofa.
What an weird way to start of a morning.
Love is open to interpretation,
So be careful how you fall into it,
Will there be someone to catch you,
Break your fall and keep you from harm?
Or would you find yourself putting back together a puzzle,
Of broken pieces from taking a leap of blind faith;
Fall in love whenever you can,
Even if it only lasts a second,
Or lives on even years after you're gone,
Because regrets are for things you didn't do,
While mistakes are lessons learned,
And love is the best teacher you could've ever encountered.
time won't slow down
the days pass like wet cement
but I am sludging through them
it won't stop and it seems
every time I get a chance
to stop and catch my breath
the present is another fond memory
time won't slow down for me
I fear I will never love her
at the point in which I should
when she is alive and
when she is good
in the now
time won't slow down
I don't know how
I tried to be
I tried to be my self
I tried to fit in
I tried to make,
with my words
Just to express
how you feel
A feeling you could never show
Only through me
I tried to be
The last thing you could use against her
And now I am lost
Lost beyond anyone.
Why can't I make you all happy.
Said: The poetry
I just think words also have words for us.
Life is like a video game.
It has controls.
You can restart it.
It has battles between anything around us.
You can dodge an attack.
You can move on to the next level.
But, it's not GAME OVER.
You continue your life on an INFINITE game mode.
You never die.
Unless you quit.