If you don't mind Mr Betts,
Can I call you Mr Betts?
Yes? Great
Mr Betts,
I'm going to keep this brief
i'd like to go through a few Q&A's
Off the record as always
And no apologies
~~~
Have you ever tried not being a priick?
Or attempted to not mess up shhit?
Every feeding and helping hand,
Innocently presented,
Got bit
Your past can't always be the culprit
The future shouldn't be viewed as unimportant
That opens the door for thoughts of forfeit
Forced to be reactant
Bilt a bridge to get over it
The craftsmanship is always immaculate
Admired from entrance to exit
Then, in the very next moment,
There's always a head turn to confirm it
A ***** and Gomorrah double take to make sure the thing stayed lit
Though you've never turn to stone or **** a brick
It's not a one time incident
I'm sensing that punishment is no longer a deterrent
It isn't, isn't it?
The troubling news is...you guessed it
Everyone's reclaiming their investment
Or eating the cost, willing to take the loss just to be done with it
Setting a telling precedent of embarrassment
One with an abundance of resentment
All the while, this battle internal is constant
Brought on ironically by an antidepressant
Raging against tendencies of a suicidal mindset
It's crazy how ugly things tend to get,
Within a quarter of a heart beat minus a minute
In other words, it's instant
Good luck, you're gonna need it."

©2024

Damaged by my damage plan
Igniting the burn ban
Been soaked in societies poison
Snap at every helping hand
Don't like me?
Well guess what?
We agree
I'm also not a fan
Ideas pulled from a porcelain can
Strangers bull excrement,
Fills my allotted bed pan
The crash is imminent,
But where & when will I land?
Problems equivalent
To the individual grains of beach sand
From sea to shining sea and,
Across the land
No one has ever out run it,
Can't understand why I ran
BUT
I'm sugar cookie bland
Therefore I do understand getting caught,
'Cause I am not
A gingerbread man

©2024

What I wouldn't give to be normal
Well,
Let's be real,
I know nothing about normal
Is there an actual definition that could be written in a way to make it simple?
I've tried to define it but I don't think it's possible
Forcing this to be rhetorical
But here we go,
What is normal?
All I've been able to conclude is it's normal to question what's normal
Other than that though,
It may be undefinable

©2024

or was it the other way around?
when I made the decision to give myself to her, I felt my soul
yearn
to be torn apart
like cells splitting in half,
simply because
something within them
told them to

have you ever seen a mother make a sandwich for a child?
she uses this kind of jam
because that's the only kind they like,
and she cuts it just this particular way
so that it fits in their lunch box

I wanted to cut my heart into shapes that she would like.
coquette cookie cutters stamped into mounds of muscle
and arteries
and sinew
for a girl that said I was special