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Matt Jursin Nov 2009
Backed in.
Upside-down yet right-side-up.
My "Days Off" are never enough.
Backed in. Feelin rough.
Being alone in my quiet place is often tough.

My mind wanders, getting lost.
Missin out on bein about.
Locked up on a cold, cloudy, winter day.
No doubt.
No trust, no love, nothing to clutch...
I hold my blanket and pout.
Loudly.
No friends wander in and out.

Undoubtedly this pen holds no cure for a broken spirit and a broken heart.
I guess this just falls under "Vague Art".
But it's a new start...to an old art.
I should've known this'd be harder than being a martyr.

Underestimating the already underestimated.
It's my time to shine.
Mesmerized by the bright light.
I try not to fight it...this paper, My Shrine.
Im an ugly person with a handsome mind, intertwined with the devine.
My life, MY throw, MY time.
It's never this easy to draw strait lines...-----------------------
DJ Thomas Dec 2010

Bride of the desert
the indomitable town
Solomon’s Kingdom

            
Lost in history, I wander through a city that was fortified by King Solomon, raided by Mark Antony and ruled by Queen Zenobia who made it the capital of an empire, only to be captured herself and paraded through Rome in gold chains.

Civilisation upon civilisation are entombed within Tadmur; in a huge plain of carved stone blocks, massive columns arched in rows or standing alone, a Romanesque theatre, senate and baths, dominated by a great temple whose origin dates back four thousand years.

Due to a clever mistranslation from Arabic by the euro-centric traveller who ‘discovered’ Palmyra, the city also has a modern name.

Here for millennia, a tribe of Bedu have camped within the folds of these desert steppes and blackened Tadmur’s ruins with their camp fires, to trade camels or herd goats and sheep. Walking the divide between city, desert and the more fertile steppes, I search for their surviving descendants and find a black woven goat’s hair tent with its edges raised to capture a cooling breeze.

Hamed and his sons, huge and wary of foreigners, welcome me to sit within on  carpets and then graciously serve dates with innumerable small glasses of tea. I indicate ‘enough’ in the traditional manner by rolling my right hand and the empty glass. Hamed continues to voice his concerns about the lack of feed for their sheep and the prices achieved at market. I readily succumb to several small cups of greenish Arabic coffee, before being allowed to take my leave.

For millennia the wealth of this city was based on tariffs levied on goods flowing out of the desert aboard swaying camel caravans. Today, these once proudly fierce tribal Bedu no longer breed, train or ride camels.

The Bedu greatly prize their reputation and the respect of their peers. Their traditions are the foundation of these small tribal communities and may predate Islam;  a life now undermined by borders, nationalism, government settlement plans, conscription, war, television and tourism.
                                         *+     +     +      +      +

Black torn empty shells
swept by Mount Lebanon’s shade
Cannabis Valley

As I recall a haiku of ‘images’ of  my very first journey to Damascus, from war-torn Beirut through the lushness of the Bekaa;

in the here and now
a dark suit and Mercedes
cross the Euphrates

Defence Minister, Rifaat al-Assad is in town with his fifty thousand strong Defence Companies, complete with tanks, planes and helicopters.  A coup d’état is in progress to assure Rifaat’s succession to the Presidency of his older brother Hafiz al-Assad, now recovering from a heart attack.

Last year, Rifaat massacred some forty thousand Syrian citizens when he ordered the shelling of the city of Hama. Nobody in Damascus will be underestimating him.

All political and military power is in the hands of the al-Assads and key generals, who command the military and police. The majority of whom are of the Alawite minority Muslim faith from the rural districts near Latakia in the North. Before their revolution, governments came and went in weeks.

My friend Elias is allied to Rifaat’s cause, by simply doing business with the son. Now he and his family share the risks and dangers of this coup failing and stand to lose a fortune. Monies paid locally in Syrian pounds for goods delivered to government agencies.

Elias’s connection with Rifaat and Latakia, as well as his confident presence, humour and love of life, still allows us easy access to the Generals’ Club. Sadly, there is to be no table and floorshow, but a closed meeting with two senior Generals, where we learn that Hafiz has recovered enough to take charge and is now locked in discussions with his younger brother.

The decision is therefore made for us. We say our goodbyes and drive to Latakia.

On Sunday Elias meets his brothers, then with his family, we visit his parents small holding and enjoy a meal together. A wonderful fresh mezza that includes my favourite, courgettes stuffed with ground lamb and rice, in a yogurt sauce. Syrian food is amazingly healthy and my cuisine of choice.

It is a cloudless Monday morning, as I, Elias, his wife and children drive into the docks to board an old 46 foot motor cruiser. Huge cases are stowed as I make my inspection, then start the twin diesels and switch on the over-the-horizon radar. Our early departure is critical. We cast off and the Mate steers for the harbour entrance below the cliffs that guard it. As the Mediterranean lifts our bow in greeting, the disembodied voice of the Harbour Master tells us to return as we do not have permission to sail.

Ignoring the order, I increase our speed through the short choppy surf. We are sailing under the Greek Cypriot flag and in an hour I hope to be out of territorial waters.  At 14 knots we are a slow target.

Fifteen nautical miles from the coast of Syria, I leave the mate to follow a bearing for Larnaca. Elias has opened a bottle of Black Label. I quaff a glassful.

Later noticing a noisy vibration and diagnosing a bent prop shaft, I shut down the starboard engine. Our speed is now a steady 8 knots, so I decide on a new heading to discern more quickly the shadow of the Cypriot coastline on the radar screen.

Midway, the mate and Elias begin babbling about a small vessel ahead and four separate armoured boxes encircling it. Ugly Israeli high speed gun boats or worse, Lebanese pirates. Should they board us and find stowed riches, we will be killed.

Leaving the Mate to maintain our course, I go on deck to play the ‘European Owner’.  The vessel they have trapped is long and lean with three tall outboard motors but no crew are in sight.  Leaving them astern, our choice of vessel now fully exonerated, I and Elias throw another whisky ‘down the hatch’.

With us holding the correct bearing, I ask Elias to wake me as soon as we near Cyprus. Feeling utterly exhausted I collapse into a bunk.  

I wake unbidden, to find the Mate steering for the harbour entrance. Shouldering him aside, I spin the wheel to bring the vessel about. Shaking, I ask them why there are minarets on the ‘church’ and did they not notice our being observed from the top of the harbour's hillock, below which a fast patrol boat is anchored?  The Mate sprints to the Greek Cypriot flag and is hugging it to his chest; Elias wisely prays.

I command the wheel as we motor directly away from the port of Famagusta and Turkish held Northern Cyprus. We later change bearing and pass tourist beaches, it is night fall before we moor-up in Larnaca.
                                         +     +     +      +      +


Later that same year I am called to a last urgent meeting in Cyprus with Elias. He calmly tells me that he will be arrested when he rejoins his family, who have returned to Syria. Elias asks me to take full control of his Cypriot Businesses, then returns home and ‘disappears’ with his brothers.
                                         +     +     +      +      +


Since sacking the two Arab General Managers when they tried to get control of the bank accounts, it has taken more than six months to locate the prison holding all the brothers. We obtain the release of all except Elias, who has been tortured.  We then ‘purchase’ him the exclusive use of the Prison Governor's quarters and twenty four hour access for Elias’s family, nurses and doctors.
                                         +     +     +      +      +


Over the last two years, I have honoured my promises and expanded trade as far as Pakistan. Elias is still imprisoned.
                                         *
+     +     +      +      +
haibun of a late twentieth century travelogue
copyright©DJThomas@inbox.com 2010
Eriko Feb 2016
some memories which have created me
I have been homesick lately.

I have lived far and wide
have seen the excursions
foreign to many eyes
my childhood born in the suburbs of Tokyo
rising to the bittersweet aftertaste
of concrete and metal,
everyday learning something new
an endless adventure,
boarding a subway and just to go
then to that of the northernmost island
Hokkaido, where I learned to love
the gentleness of snow
yet fear the brutality of the cold,
spending days and hours
entire weeks on the mountain side
wooden log cabins, wonderful blazing fires
with a snowboard strapped to my leg
oh, how I feel so powerful and graceful
flying down the mountain
carving into the chest deep snow
hear my laughter echo into the air
as I watched the stars glimmer
on the icy peaks,
and in the summer everything turned green
I went kayaking and painted
in the fluttering sweet breeze
then back to the city I found myself
eradicated from my home country
placed in Seoul Korea
my apartment that of 31st
of a 45 story building
riding the subway from and to school
that was nothing of difference with me
the city never truly sleeps
and I don't remember ever closing my eyes
with a longboard underneath my feet
hurling through crowded streets
cars honking in rush hour
the city lights seen for miles and miles
getting lost in alleyways and black markets
craning my neck to see metal scrape the sky
because of such cities, Tokyo and Seoul
I always ventured at night, a nocturnal teenage girl
skirting on the Han River, meeting so many people
being multilingual  but always alone,
never behind the closed end of the door
in Seoul that's where I discovered how to cope alone
in Tokyo I discovered the joy of the unknown
a short excursion in that of Hawaii
tasting the salty seas
riding the crashing waves every morning
watching the sun rise and feeling comfort
in the soft white sands and tall green palm trees
flying down paved roads
and underestimating sunburns
long boards and parks, going swimming in the dark
lush forests and scaling mountains
I had no money but made the best of it
then to the mainland, the big United States
I haven't been here very long, in the midwest
probably will never understand
the southern accent
and the American youth's mindset
only, I haven't been here very long
I have been stuck inside
but I have nothing to hide
it's a different society
a culture which always escapes me
I have been dreaming but remember nothing
just feeling a bit homesick
I don't want to make it sound like the U.S. is bad. No, this was just a big adjustment, a huge shift in lifestyle.
Ruthie Nov 2010
isolated thoughts amidst the night

gazing in wonder what an amazing sight

never underestimating the mystery laid out

always respecting the massive power

appreciating the view hour by hour

what should I fear but that which thought it

built and named with perfect ease

always a treasure to you and me
Marco Batista Jan 2014
Feels like I'm fighting forever with these demons
Underestimating the toll it's having on my body
Can't let complications control me, just confuse
Killing the negativity could resolve this

Make me realize what I'm worth
Excite me with the possibilities

Harass me with profound positivity
Accept my unpredictable atrociousness,
Realize, realistically,  that I can love.
Dance with my emotions, set me free.
Aria of Midnight Nov 2014
Competing,
sabotaging, manipulating,
controlling, demeaning, angering,
underestimating, avenging,
hurting
stops when you
learn to respect
that person.
Daniil Kochergin Mar 2021
He underestimates himself,
He only waits for a wonder,
He thinks he’s better off sad,
And afraid to become brighter.
He doesn’t wanna grow up,
So he sinks in his lies
Interfering strive for the top
And stop all of his cries,
He doesn’t even know
Why he is doing that,
Why he’s on his own
And why he is mad.
Here is another day,
Another torment as he thinks,
He need to turn it other way
And he will spread his mighty wings.
He wakes up again,
Cleans himself up,
Turns on Cobain,
Pours tea into his cup–
Everything is as usual.
Life loves him so much,
But her love is unmutual.
Some time and he’s at his work,
It’s only thing loved by him,
But he tells her no word,
So, it’s time to begin.
His boss wanna meet him–
He has no choice
And he left the whole team
To hear his voice
– Good morning, Mr. White,
How is your well-being?
– Good morning, Mr.Fry,
I’m good (that was a kidding)
– That’s why you’re here.
What’s with your mental health?
– I can tell you, but I fear…
– I’ll keep it all to myself.
– Why should I trust you?
– I swear, I’ll be true to my word.
– I’ve fire in my soul that I can’t stew,
Seems like I’m in hell and I’m burnt,
Why? I lost my last friend of suicide,
His dead hurts me more than my mother’s–
She’s never been on my side,
I think I'll be killed by my bothers.
Do you understand me and my feelings?
– You don't know, but I have no parents...
Your worries didn't lost their meanings,
But you have to cool down to gain a balance.
Please, take life easier than you’re doing,
Don't think that you are totally lonely,
Life is a place you infinitely grow in,
Even if you do it unbelievably slowly.
I hope you’ll never forget what I said.
– You’re orphan?… I’m so sorry..
You showed me my worldview is so bad,
Thank you for that, I mustn’t worry
To my awful mood become good.
I understood that I wasn’t right,
To be hapless or blessed– I may choose,
I hate myself 'cause I’m blind.
It’s time to comprehend the truth,
Time to amend my inner-self,
I know, this way will not be smooth,
But I can do this ’til I stop my breath.
– I’m glad to know I am understood.
Your work is looking forward to you.
Now you have to better your mood.
Take care, there is nothing else I can do.
– I can’t thank you enough, I’m off!
Many ideas turned over in his mind,
He revived his personal growth,
His life started to turn into a flight.
Two months later:
He forgot that once he was sad,
He became better
And his past problems are dead,
We really can say that!
Daisy King Aug 2014
A pile of human teeth,
that which does not belong to itself but to the night and the moon
     and the lock and the hook, that which once did belong to itself,
     or to me,
a murmur and little more,
   something you shake in the hope that answers to the questions
     you want or some reasons you've yet to find
     will come falling out,
an inhabitant in a house that becomes a crime scene during their absence and they cannot be an eyewitness,
she who wanders along the beach by the sea,
    in search of shells,
   to listen in for the sound of old echoes,
         the unreal, suspended, irrelevant,
         the night-time fragments leftover after
            daylight gets its teeth in,
       a rule-****** in asymmetrical glasses,
       one of a family of confused clowns, juggling dreams
         that were once in trees, struggling
         and underestimating distance,
a cracked window in November that seems out of place,
    a Tuesday afternoon, and specifically not a Friday sunse
    or Sunday dawning,
a wishful **** belonging in the boneyard,
housing an ocean of unspeakables in
    attic mind,
    greenhouse heart,
    cavern mouth full of sea,
the container of many unspeakables,
    a cup, profoundly sad for being always a touch too empty,
        contained inside a small glass bottle,
         a paperweight.
This poem is comprised of the various things that I have compared myself to in metaphor in poems I have written in the past.
JLB Jul 2012
1) help endures even the worst pumpernickel shortbread *****, but understanding outweighs that of the pessimistic drug lords squatting in **** ridden sandlots.
2) compassion is for the virtuistic harlequins.
3) underestimating the estimatable is the idea, even under a load of unsettling emotions. just hoard them in your fannypack.

4)the *** next door may make your head spin, and the typewriter might make your nails crack. but, beyond all of that, there lies an undisclosed truth. one that neither the walls nor the space bar underneath your thumb will ever know:
    
I am here, and this is now.
Ayaba Babe Dec 2012
My hands glide over her body
My body glides in tune with hers.
The urge,
The need, the incredible temptation.
The suddenly surreal sensation.
Hands instinctly find their slippery way down her braziere;
Touching her there
Touching her here.
Carefully caressing her
Beautiful
Flawless twin triple scoops of creamy delicious vanilla ice cream.
Eyes abeam.
I pinch my ******* hard, my teeth longing to wrap themselves around hers.
Insatiable, rationable; moment deferred.
I'd love to stay and devour her, but my way must be made.
Body contact and relations, hormones fail to fade.
Raging.
I make my way with the heat on high.
Blast on full.
Clothes flying against the car wall.
Driving with both hands down my pants
Underestimating chance.
Not even the night can cool me down.
haley Nov 2018
my air
is heavy with volume
my air
is hard to attain
my air
is desperately sought for
when the occupancy of
people is tested by my mind’s
carrying capacity to absorb
all these racing thoughts
present with tears,silence,and isolation
in hope to escape the
impending
fill in the blank
course of action or person or idea
that will cast sweat blanketing my body
like inevitable dew on grass
leave me seemingly forever choosing flight
against my will
my feet bear the burden
of countless runs to sanctuary
‘Be kind to your body’
knees meet the earth
familiar contact
bruises are an old friend
hyperventilation the unwelcome relative
anxiety is myself
‘I’m trying’
how many cubicle walls
stood mute witnessing
the remnants of remnants
of strength to hold my face
that’s not my face
leak out in the form of rivers
eroding the skin underneath my eyes
my cheeks will rival that of
marble
smooth and absent of
everything
‘Take care of yourself’
i ache for good days
i’ll even settle for alright
if it means i’m okay
not-overthinking
i wish i could do less of
not-restlessness
my vessel craves quiet sleep and
peace in me
not-fear
i want to cast out these demons
‘I’m trying’
people
events
school
the definition of
things
every single aspect
that encompasses my
life
has been trying
in one way or another
the fragility of my spirit
to endure
all thrown in my direction
with self doubt
with self hate
with self breaking
over analyzing
overestimating
underestimating
second guessing
worrying
uncertainty about
all
‘Happiness is your priority’
the pursuit of bliss
carefreeness
grounding
it’s a method
to combat
attacks
i versus i
long to come back to earth
when my being is suspended
in the clouds
weightless encapsulation
with invisible ties
slave to my own
where is gravity with
this one
does floating have an
expiration date
endless breathes
shaking frame
eyebrows turned north
formed physical mountain
‘I’m trying’
language screaming from my
closed mouth
words etched onto my
form
for only my eyes to
memorize
my mental
health
possesses it’s own personal climate
goes through seasons
falls and blooms
chills my soul
and warms my entirety
it’s ever evolving
unpredictable as
forecasting without
equipment
it is not without the weather of
natural disasters
environmental factors
the state of
my atmosphere in my head
there are disagreeable
conditions
precipitation frequent
cloudiness often
pressure recurrent
occasional storms
however
there are
instances of numerous sunshine
periodic stability
intermittent clear skies
conquering or failing
one day after another
the routine cycle
giving what i get
and providing what i receive
with full knowledge
someday i will have to
try no longer
‘I’m trying’

-Haley
Simon Oct 2019
Logical doesn’t have taste. It has circumstance. Only to be tasteful, is to be surrounded by a taste of what gradually makes a self importance greater to yourself. Proudly underestimating yourself at first. Giving closure to the surrounding areas. Taste has no boundaries here. A made-up friction. A made-up functionality. A dripping faucet without clarity. Dripping one social taste at any given time. Clarity giving rise to the surrounding areas with logical ingredients. Logical ingredients slapping taste buds without concern for logical praise. Logical praise that doubts it’s understanding of taste buds giving praise to ingredients without concern for how praise will affect it’s priorities. Priorities finishing the diversity of something logical with a taste. The taste buds feeling the diversities finalizing ingredients in their rightful places. Like shiny white plates on display for the crowd of praises effecting one’s own priorities. Teeth whitening the taste buds for greater effect. Praises finally giving the logical praise the taste it deserves. More surrounding areas include a broader crowd. A newer logical taste starts to emerge in the practice of ingredients giving logical praise to the logical priorities that govern it so. Praise from newer surroundings influencing more ingredients in the form of logical taste. More taste buds start feeling the diversities in the praise which salivates the practice of logical assessments. A reverse act giving rise to a simplified logical taste without boundaries.
Taste doesn’t come with ordinary pleasure. It's when it's dosed with the logical arts onto taste buds, will it truly shine brighter!
Meagan Jan 2013
~ Anticipation overwhelms the air
   Time slows down, freedom elopes
~ Motionless, extremely unaware
   Nervousness grows stronger, as my heart beats faster
~ A familiar face, everything changes
   Emotions all fade, faith is restored
~ Right back where we left off, we continue the pages
   Underestimating the new changes
~ Another 'hello' soon follows another 'goodbye'
   Back to reality, we go our separate ways
~ Always remembering the little things throughout time
   Our paths will meet again, we both know it's true
~ Commotion of lies from people around
   Never believe them, they'll never force me to frown
~ We take what we want, and give what we take
   Without this, we would believe and become what we hate
~ Another journey home, don't know what to expect
   I know there will be you, and the things you protect
~ Dignity, reputation, what the people see
   While I protect what makes me free
        ~Meagan Williams
       1.15.13
Long distance love, how strong is it really? I guess I'll find out.
Enlighten Me-
I’m always underestimating self-master bating-
Graduated-
At the top of fund frustration-
My motivation needs money relations-
The contemplation of money making has my mind at a constant hating-
My breaking patience-
Has my mind like a **** relating-
Regulations of all my banking-
See my bank account disintegrating-
I’m suffocating-making payments-Late fee statements-
Debit-Credit-Cash-oking
Debit-Credit-Cash-oking
Racki­ng bills my back is breaking-my nerves are shaking-
Shaking more than I anticipated-
Now I’m here with a life to fear-
Writing till my mind is clear-
Writing till I feel what’s real-
Writing till I seal a deal-
Multiplying-
Adding-Subtracting-and dividing-
Signing more checks than providing-
It’s suicide I’m not denying-Rhyming trying its crucifying-
Clocking in before the sun is rising Grinding flying hoping griming-living life nine to fiving-
Its re-revising-Re-defining-Rectifying-
More so that I think I’m hiding-
Killing with finical violence-Violating my banks alliance-
Maxing plastic so fantastic now I need some re-advising-interest rates have a grown man crying-Million dollars seem so un-winding-
Now I’m whining-
Constant buying-
Gas rates got me into biking-riding-fighting-
Just surviving-any discount seems so delighting-winning lotto seems o-so-righteous-buy one get one is so exciting-
Boot leg buying I ain’t lying-
Being broke is constant rewinding-It’s reminding-so relying-over drawing is my new binding-it’s confining-so I’m finding-Making takings of my disliking-Making takings that are so dang freighting-dollar scratchers are so inviting-
But this realization is so enlightening-
Moving as fast as a bolt of lighting-
I’m asking you G-d to help me like this-
I’m feeling the pain and I think I might just-
ROB ME A BANK-
BY:
RICHARD ITSKOVICH
Ariz Portal Jun 2015
Wine for the church, Water for the poor, leaving ashes of blood, Underestimating love

Bodies feel cold with their prays, Expressions get reduce through their truth, But they will underestimate

Phrases that will change the minimum thought of law, And we all share the same blood, But we all live the same hopes, drinking the pure selfishness of their books

May they judge their own coverage? May they proof  wrong from our living? Could there be more excuses from them to keep excluding us?

There’s not a lot for them to defend, But they had proven their power to prohibit And lies to overstate

But I heard that their father loves everyone equally, Which his sons have proven wrongly, In which galaxy we’ll be eating from the same plate?

When we’ll be kissing the same face? But we all share the same blood, And we all live the same hopes, Drinking the pure selfishness out of their world

Wine for church, Water for the poor, Leaving ashes of blood, Underestimating love.
Written By Bethzy Gamez.
Nik Bland Oct 2012
Brave
Oh heart of depth
Another round of applause
For works of art that try the mind
A truly worthy cause

What goes into your process
The journey that you choose
The words that always win
In a soul that seems to lose

Bravo
Oh heart of depth
Your crescendo in evident
Each work of art a tortured one
Every word worth its pence

Quiet lips which grace your solemn expression
With eyes that blaze and scream with pencil's tip
No failure, just falling in your view
Little infants of poetry birthed within your grip

Bravo
Oh heart of depth
Tumultuous in the veil of words formed
Falling into underestimating eyes
Knowing not the whirlpool they swarm
Shannea Magina Dec 2013
Daisy fresh girl from the garden of her mothers womb
You bloom with perfection; like a wonderful comb
Never let love cross the line
Questioning the reason why you are still alive

It will be okay don't cry it will be fine
Maybe you wonder why the sun sets but never seem to shine
And hatred is flowing straight from your veins
You are an original
Don't let people label you as freak,
That's perfectly not fine oh please don't state that obvious lie
And stop underestimating yourself
I tell you this for the three hundred and sixty-five time

As afternoon embraced
The lights all fade
So does the sparkle in your little eyes
Now take a rest, fall asleep in the river bed
And tell me about your dreams
A piece of you had died
I'll bury you some place beautiful
And when you wake up, everything will be just fine
Raven Jan 2014
Gazing into the abyss,
Experiencing extraordinary bliss.
Irrefutably tranquil and content,
How foolish, to proudly circumvent.
The prominent beauty you observe
Could surely devistate and unnerve
This deceitful cunning entity
Obtaining the essence of identity
Becoming a grotesque atrocity
Such unexplainable ferocity
A strong burning temptation
Revenge and retaliation
Your surges on the rise
Underestimating you was unwise
Exhibiting robust and hostile motion
You are, infact, the ocean.
ardnaxela May 2022
living off
of apologies and time
spent in desperation
recollecting and reflecting
on where
all of the good vibes went
then
I may have smoked them.

underestimating my
control
of the situation
like I'm not
educated in protecting
my Peace
and healing my whole
mind, body
and Spirit

deflecting questions of
my integrity
all
because I prefer
complexity -
it takes me
three lefts
to make it right.

also some
times
I have to remind
myself
that it's okay
to cry
boiling hot emotions
got this little black kettle
singing high

currently
I'm choking
on the
hard pill
of a broken home
..heartache
worse than a broken bone
this is admitting to myself
that
I could be traumatized.
True.

I need a
get away
like Lenny says
quick break
with Mary, Garcia
and Vega
the only chance I ever get
to take flight.

in all Honesty
I am really
tired
of people
pushing me
and pulling me.
college drop-outs
they think
they schooling me
they are
tools to me.
Shorty,
swing my way
with that hammer
No
I'm not
driving for that *****.

some say real
Love is
Black
some say it's
blue..
I say it's both
you know
the winners
always leave with
a little
bruise .
or two . .
or3 . . .

there probably may come
a time of day
where
you have to choose
whether
to lose
yourself
in this matrix
or
to fight
by your own rules
and well

Here

is to you,
my Little Light
your presence is proof
that some
times
choosing
True
Love is
the right thing to do.
this started as a song.
Sethnicity May 2015
Off guard on duty the snowflake knew time to waste
Its unknowing decent cataract rapid acidic proletariat
Less than perspicacious a red hand to the case,
No longer judicious a domino race

My words are **** ashes fertilizing the world wide wind
More of us make less of them
but they bombastic at the power within
We all possess the power to sin

Tell me something true as I lament the news.
Billie war Holidays sing song me the blues
Hands shoot in the air guns clap on the beat
Future sigh in despair old vote with their feet
Factors of fear multiplied without receipt
So you can't exchange the Unknown for something concrete.
Afraid for our lives while we wither away humanity
circumventing diaspora in the name of the low and no holds bar

The cross exam I mag I nation
no accountability when
Severing and Projecting
The streets.

Is all pomp and circumstance  
Ignorance in defeat?
because American apathy is a golden gutter
lining the highways of hope and justice.

The great black hope
driven to equivocal ends
The magisterial mountain way
Waved inundation of political bends

There are no u turns OK
home of the straight and narrow
Wed with the freedom ring
Blistered by the oil we use to butter bread

what can we say we
learned from the best
it's intoxicated
intercontinental intelligence

One man's pain is another man's pleasure.
By what other means can we rationalize and measure?
I didn't make the rules We did
Don't just vote cut throat


Over calculated the complexity of human habit
by underestimating the simplicity of evol u tion.
Chopped and ******* time over and over waited
ya head hangs low Soci ally Osc illated


So heavy   it's a wonder
these words  don't    black hole
through   gravity  and bull licks
baby daddy bell tolls

He would bend Time
and
Space
taking mother place
to place
stringing
paycheck to paycheck
like

Hindu prayer cloths
on
Hollywood
sidewalks

Hailing  uncle Sam  and  the oil man
2 lend a hand,     job,     or a plan
**** only getting noticed


by the
under educated yet
over- privileged
college dropout


offering tea and sympathy
cause limping ain't easy,
and    systemic negligence
is   public enemy   # 1...

The only explosion
to fear is the sun.
We are **** dust
in the lung

When all is said and dung,
All lives matter
like helium
and radon

Exp  lo ding  in Uni son
Sys tem Ic  Ra ce Ism
Eyes hyper-focused on the finger
and the wind cried boom a rung
I write because I read, I read to get it right, Reed into everything my friend.
Consider the cascading of events that brings us back around again and again...
Mad at the piper but the cause is forgotten in the effects.
Glayz Welch May 2015
Maniac
Insane
Say you're sorry
Still betraying

Youthful, not anymore
Obvious, like you're at war
Underestimating, soon you'll see, the people you hurt, not just me

Mine forever
Or until you die
**** took you away from me, I won't believe your lies
Jackie Mar 2014
You have entered my mind
I'm trying to give it time
But you've set up camp in my subconscious
Playing tricks and chopping me down
Bringing me to a state of vulnerability
So people will think you're winning somehow
Well you've got me
I'm losing control
I know you've been watching
But to you its not old
It's just beginning
Can you please let me sleep one night
Without sending me images that make me scream
If you hurt the ones I love
You will be the one who bleeds
I know you are underestimating me
Just like I underestimated you
You might of got past the cameras
But my eyes are set on you
Push me one more time
And I won't stay in line
The thoughts in my head would make even the toughest man cry
Katie Aug 2014
Miscommunication, dislocation, and the dumb
underestimating figuration, makes me numb
stagnant fluctuation, indication that I'm done
confusion, complication, confrontation, have i won?
Over powered, under fueled, restless worries scar
anger, enemies, fear and pain, never will be far
Procrastination, contemplation, the dying and the dead
These thoughts are overflowing, never going from my head
trouble, logic, life
Samm Marie Jul 2016
Agnostic girl full of
Belief in the mirror I
Create behind closed
Doors that open wide when I
Emerge into the terrifying world
Faking so much, so often
Grieving the fear that consumes me
Holistically I am an actress
In a world full of pretenders
Jestering my pride and arrogance
Keeping an ounce of who I really am with
Love from my closest friend
Most nights I can't go to sleep without
Nodding along to the music with tears in my eyes
Opening and closing, so close to losing every
Particle of my true self who hides behind the façade of
Real tough girl, but really I'm just a
Scared little girl, seeking approval
Through abusive relationships that get me nowhere
Underestimating my worth
Vicariously living through those I help
Wondering when I'll stop pretending and wanting
Xanax to ease my mind and cure the never
Yielding ball of AGGH in my stomach reaching the
Zenith called my mouth for awful bile filled days

This is the reality
That creates me
Miss Masochist Feb 2014
A defense mechanism; a shield; a lie.
You let your guard down, underestimating my wisdom and abilities.
You lack the morals you pretend are there.
You're fake, and I can destroy you.
charlie Dec 2013
I never wanted to see you hurt,
never crying, never unzipping your skin.
And I've only seen one of the two.

I said I loved you the month after we met and I meant it.
Because when you fall in love you do it hard.
And I wanted to have that feeling,
Never underestimating the feeling in your gut,
And I was okay with hurting you. For I didnt intentionally.

The night you fell in love with her you told me you never wanted to touch her,
But you also never wanted to loose her.

The night you lost her you cried to the heavens praying she'd come back...
And I still see you do it from time to time.

When you fell in love again, she said she wanted to *******, and that you could be on top, and my god did that ruin everything.
She unzipped her skin in the shape of a y exposing herself to you, but not in the way she wanted.
You did not pray for anything this time.

I said I loved you in my room, when I was blackening my insides, when I heard you say I love you too.

You wrote your first poem about the girl you liked yesterday, and I screamed at you.
For it wasnt about me.
But I saw you pray for the first time in months,
And I never seond guessed who it was about.
It wasnt about me,
or her
It was for you.
Because your getting weaker and I can see it. Because whenever you speak you speak in thorns, your voice doesnt perk up with laughter and baby giggles as it did before.

And I saw you do unzip your skin for the final time.
Joel Thomas Dec 2020
The skies were bright and the vegetation so green
Whispers from the grown and infants were heard aloud
The slow breeze submerged with joy blew far and wide
The miseries of man travelled like an uncertain tide

Then it came so calm and mellow at first
The mortals underestimating it's might lived with no fear
It knocked on doors and took the elders and the young with such ease
It grew on them and consumed their souls till they were just bodies left in the cold to freeze

The bravest of men fought like the knights at war
The weak had fallen to the grim reapers arms
The joys were faded and the moralities were torn
Earth was was ****** and left to scorn

It erased the desires of men which burned like the flaming sun
The place they called home turned into their tomb
To those who walked it's hardest road
It thought beauty of life is so far fetched yet so broad
Kara MacLean Dec 2010
You came to me once
In a dream of my childhood
Barbie and Ken, walking together
They would dance like puppets
Their fate my control
I would dream and wish to be like Barbie
Beautiful, and loved.
My biggest dream, to go to prom with the man of my dreams.
I left barbie in the abyss, still dreaming to become her
To be loved by people, to be cherished, and to find my Ken
But it didn't work exactly as I hoped.
I found a Ken, but this Ken was a girl, Kendal.
and with confusion and some doubt I stayed with her
Through what could have been love, yet could have been fear
I rode through the waves, and stayed for three years
I never did end up going to prom with a boy of my dreams
I went with a girl in a dress, which people mistook for my friend,
with the thought that I would never actually find a date.
One day she finally mustered up the courage to let me free from her sea
I was alone, but alone was okay
I was free from the ties that had traveled with me through my teens.
Only a month back at college and the same thing happened again
A girl, and her soft nature pursued me
And that soft and recognized feeling, I could not refuse
And again, here I am
Unsure of what I want
Still with the fantasy of finding my dream boy
But maybe no boy will love me the way I wish for him to.
Maybe I am defective in his eyes, or lost
Or maybe I am just scared to leave such a comfortable presence...
That of a woman.
Are you a lesbian?
Never ask me that question.
You will never understand my thoughts
You will never set a label on me
And you are an ignorant *******
You can't approach me because you think I'm gay?
Then *******.
Go live in some ****** up world where everything has a label
Where no abstract concepts exist and you will perish under the tree labeled "forbidden fruit"
It will go into flames and you will perish not through fire
But at the thought of me.
Maybe I AM afraid
Maybe I don't KNOW what I want.
And maybe I'm a little insecure
But one thing I do know is that one day I will muster up courage
I will believe that people will not leave me
And I will have trust in men again
And I will stop being confused
And you will ALL see.
And no matter what I choose, It is MY decision
Not the worlds decision
Not fates decision
Not the governments decision
Not my friends' decisions
Not any man in the WORLD's decision
But Mine.
So good luck placing me in a category I don't belong in
Good luck racing to conclusions and underestimating my worth
Because I will find the missing key to my soul one day
not sure what to make of this one
Sia Jane Sep 2015
We are walkers of the dawn
losing direction as the final star
fades from the night sky-
no internal compass to guide us
as we lose sight of the Milky Way

We are balloons children cut loose
to watch soar
above their bedroom window
with the hope one day
they will do the same      

We are billows of smoke formed
from catastrophes in our minds
when our fears take hold
blowing our dreams to smithereens

We are the Harvest Moon
suffocated by the shadow of Earth
starved of the light which reveals
our existence

We revere those we see
as greater than us
sweeping ourselves
under the carpet
no account for our worth

We discount our own gifts
push them aside
underestimating their power
to save others & ourselves

We walk in the shadow
of our demons
so burned by the chains
on our own ankles
we become nothing more
than cinders
where are feet once were

We cry to the moon each night
praying for a miracle
thinking the sky is falling in
& the world ending
before our very eyes

We are all just fragments
delicately placed together
by a maker on the Moon
walking this Earth
too scared to reach
out a hand
and embrace our fellow man

© Sia Jane
A* is for *anything to end this suffering
B is for broken, breaking like my fragile state
C is for careful, cautious of these eggshells
D is for disaster, destruction of what we had
E is for empty, emotionless cries in the night
F is for false, fake like the lies we tell ourselves
G is for grief, grieving not over the dead but mistakes
H is for horrible, hatred the purest of black
I is for insanity, insomnia plaguing my sleep
J is for jaded, just lacking in many emotional departments
K is for knavish, kiddish behaviour I exemplify
L is for lost, losing faith, happiness and you
M is for mistakes, monster at heart and in action
N is for nonsensical, never-ending
O is for officious, obnoxious demeanour and persona
P is for pathetic, powerless to make the right moves
Q is for quitter, quick to leave and walk away
R is for resentment, relationships aren't for men like me
T is for turmoil, turbulence beneath the wings of trouble
U is for understatement, underestimating
V is for violent, vindictive almost as if by nature
W is for wishful, waiting for something new
X is for xenodochial, but never to those who matter most
Y is for youthful, yokelish and distasteful to be around
Z is for zany, pertaining to the cause of most problems
I really don't know, in all honesty is a bashful, distasteful slur
Take it with a grain of salt, I posted it because it got alot off my chest, if you take offense, are hurt, or displeased with its existence, Alt+F4 :L
Kurt LaVacque Sep 2014
Shed from the earth,
Searching for a greater dividing factor of 
Soliloquies between diligent rapture
Understood, expectations, relinquish, your citations
Benevolent destruction, and omniscient revelations 
Calamity, onto infamy, delegated, by a single floating leaf
Entropy without linear symmetry, involves, nothing but bigotry 
For go selective, simplicity, underestimating the unknown, killing spree
Damnation, to call upon humanity, sad to say, to end is such a way

— The End —