I must relive our nights when I dream,
because it’s unreal laying with you.
I am left breathless by your smile’s gleam!

Intense dark black sky, the moon so blue;
your skin’s touch that lifts me to new heights.
In pure bliss we admire the star’s view.

But awake I wonder of those nights...
were you also gazing at the stars;
or really looking at the streetlights?

Loneliness

it feels misunderstood
i misunderstand it

when can we feel it? true loneliness?

when their hand stiffens and drops to the floor?
leaving us alone
in our thoughts
on earth

the final text in a rotting friendship?
if it ever truly was a friendship

my heart aches.
what could have been?
memories flood.
who would I be?
tears fall.
why did I go?

the hardest fight to win
is the one that is forever raging
an inch never taking

no man's land is your residence
you can only proceed with hesitance
as this battle your fighting is you against you
and its filled with dissonance

turbulent thoughts
eddy flows and countercurrent desires
your mind is afloat in a sea of indecision
waiting for a vision
of clarity
Where is my north star?
My guiding light
to help me on my mission
to make this decision

I keep wrestling with my ambition
and my desire for submission
to my guilty side
unobliging
not hiding
never shying
from the chance to take all my time
and burn it with relaxation

a win for the soul but a loss for the mind
why sleep now when I have the rest of time?
but never slowing will the dim the glowing
of the creative ember lighting the way
and you never want to see that day
when it fades away

so take your time, let your stress wash away
let the good times play
maybe even pray?

Life is there tomorrow
you are here today

Ever feel so certain that you've found the right way?

I feel so certain, every single day.

But like the wind, my mind will change.
Change and bend but never breaks.

I'm on a journey but is it the right path?
I thought so yesterday when I went left.

Back then right and zig and zag.
Where am I going? I have to ask.

I thought I got there, I thought you were the one, but I'm sat here in darkness and;

I still don't know.

Naps hit like a brick wall
At cement semi truck speeds
The collision re-envisions
Clay brick to ice cube
Shattering into my reality,
As I try and get up from
My prone position
My mind fills in the cracks,
Of my name, my place, my childhood,
With the melted mixing moments
It had just shown me before,

Mr. CandyCane visiting last minute,
With exes kissing every other tooth,
Grown bamboo out of a pupil,
Who sits attent in my dog's school,
Greeted by your smiling face at home,
But his face is reflected on my head in your eyes
Forehead lines are my only check at this point,
In dreams my face refuses to show up,
But awake I cannot escape acne wrath

just hit my second decade
will it be my last?

are the questions
I ask in uni
worth the breath
I waste on it?

the papers I write,
the presentations I complete,
is anything worth it?

no one knows