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Nat Lipstadt Mar 2019
your command is not my wish, Ilion

”give us your entrails of the hidden innocent truths of oft too quiet souls, a soul bearing the realities of who mankind is at its root”   Ilion Gray

it slaps me as a usual unusual,
an unexpected realization thanks to your in-sight,
that all our wordplay is just gardening for life’s lost collections;
out of order, badly memorized memory markers;

one must snout-root around in the backyard for the
entrails and the bones of generations of pets that are
hollowed out hallows,
kept in a sanctified corner crypt rarely visited

a lost treasure of honorable burials with pomp and circumstance,
many Star War figures play-interred by a boy who’s now a grownup, with two children but doesn’t come to visit cause he has man-size responsibilities and his California backyard is so very far
from the ‘park’ of his youth

strange that we hide the innocent truths
that are neither shameless and seamless,
but yet, nonetheless
warrant safekeeping in nearby dirt treasury chests,
lest,  just in case, to see the future,
we need retrieve
brilliant bright flashbacks kept below deck,
just nearby, just in case,
the ball bearings of the soul requiring viscous lubricating

souls grow quieter with age, even as the
grunting of bent-over digging up what is down down,
grows daily more noisy,
as deeper depths require the work of
pluming  and plumbing,
as time adds inches of soil, just as a tree adds an annual ring

you smile outwardly at what you inwardly auto-wince,
as you think twice about
what truths you may uncover, for better or for worse,
too many,
best left soiled encumbered,
for great is the risk of soiling oneself
when uncovering the
recovery of the best buried

but what was your wish dear Ilion,
transmigrates, and is now a command center  of
self awareness, realities, are scars,
some worn proudly and others with unbearable shame,
uncomfortably uncovered in roots of nightmares
watering in the
subterranean subconscious

the dreams we do not wish for,
come and command nonetheless from the way way back of the
chambers of the backyard brain, a reminder that
quiet souls should avoid the trails possibly leading to
grand entrances of entrails,
sadly admitting full well,
one cannot hide from risible, mocking, loathsome,
guilty truths to the surface rising

when I give you of myself,
exposing old roots hastens their endings,
exposed, they cannot be replanted,
not in earth, not in concrete, not in brain cells,
is that old friend,
what you truly wish?
March 12, 2019 8:52am

those of you who react and comment so eloquently and insightfully to my poems, too often seed the next one and the next one! who can claim no inspiration when the commune nourishes me continuously...
I tell myself I don’t want him,
I tell myself,
I tell myself
But then I cry so hard
Going in reverse to a place that I’ve never yet been.

It’s supposed to get easier,
That’s what they tell you,
But this is only ever weighing heavier.
I could try to be what I imagine you’d have wanted,
But why should your mistakes make me feel ashamed?
And because of my existence I never
Want to give you what you want.

I guess I should hide the anger from my eyes,
But why prevent it when all you feel is volatile and pathetic?
Complaints when I hold it in and accusations when I don’t,
Sometimes I feel I should just hold kindness for myself.

When I have time I feel exhausted,
Later I feel like a failure to have let him win again:
It shouldn’t matter,
It shouldn’t matter.
They’d probably tell me negative affirmations don’t work,
Except to me they’re stating positives.
I’m trying to make it okay,
I’m trying to be better.

Always, I say, I don’t want him
And now his nonexistent thoughts won’t go away,
It must be my fault for becoming upset because really he’s done nothing
(Even if I can’t claim that without my own blood boiling),
Teasing myself with non-realities, with fairytales and broken dreams of a type of heaven I will never see.

My small voice murmurs,
“I want it, please.”
My brain tells me it would be better not to breathe.
In the dark it likes to help me,
Supporting in my self-destruction,
Simply because why shouldn’t it?
It’s a weapon I can use to back up anything no matter the relevance.
I’ve subtracted all the logical ways this could ever matter,
Yet it’s still here waiting for me to succumb,
Lately it gets pointless to want to hold back.
Nevertheless, with every single thought I have a defence
Because I never want anyone else to win,
I need to be ready,
I need to be able to show them all:
That this never meant a thing to me.

That just wouldn’t make sense,
To admit such sacrificial things
When I shouldn’t be the one to feel bad,
So no, just because I know it’s his fault,
Does not mean his absence hurts me.

It’s all just softly (painstakingly) nonexistent to me.
Finn Feb 2019
Oh The Boys

Played With All Of Their Toys

Puppeteering People In Their Minds

They Told Truths

And Told Lies Once More

When They Told The Truth It Was True

When They Lied It Was False

When They Didn't Speak At All

I Wonder If

They Lied Or

Told Truths To Themselves
This is an older one of mine from -what?- 2016? Maybe 2015...
Paras Bajaj Jan 2019
Tell me your darkest secrets,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me your forbidden sins
or what keeps you awake till 4?

Tell me your deepest thoughts,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me all the battles you fought,
or what keeps you on the floor?

Tell me your truths, not lies,
I am not a stranger anymore.
Tell me your failures, not tries
or what keeps you behind that door?

-Paras Bajaj #PoetrybyParas
Instagram : @mr.parasbajaj
I wish I believed in soul mates,
But that would require me to have a soul,

It’s not that I am cold or cruel,
It’s just if I believed souls were real;
Then i would also have to believe
In reincarnation,

And I’ll be ******
If I have to spend
Another
Lifetime
With
You.
Juju Juju Jan 2019
They called me names,
And threw at me fake claims,
They wished upon me death,
And drowned me in their dishonesty until I lost my breath,
They lied about things I’ve never said,
Swore by name over things I never did,
They put up warning signs that I bring terror
And I couldn’t help but think to myself “couldn’t this world be fairer?”

They raged at me with absolute hatred,
Treated me differently saying I need to be isolated,
But the question remains what did I do?
Are you trying to blame me for others mistakes too?

But look at the world and what it has become,
They say its the land of the free but why am I not welcome?

My days were hard,
And my nights were scarred,
For after all I am just a ******,

And “I been quiet for too long, so now its time to break the silence”
“I start with the killing, so F stopping the violence”
“First things first man, you’re F with the worst,
I’ll be sticking pins in your head like im a F nurse,
“You going against me dawg, you making a mistake cuz ill split ya,
And leave ya,
Looking like the Michael Jackson jackets with all them zippers,
Im the boss of this boat, you can call me skippers”
And I met a ******* kid named Greg with a wooden leg,
Snatched it off and beat him over the F(ing) head with the peg,”
Oh did you think what I just said was shoddy?
“But I claim my thang to slang them ****** bodies”
“**** them all, send them (hoes) up in flames’”
“Hey, I slay all (******) who think we play” so don’t put me on blame
“You got my word so observe”
Im sorry but I won’t reserve,
“I shatter and splatter bodies and bones,”
“I bust nerves open” bring me all the stones,

“Oh here I go again, hatred walks with me
Its obsessing me,
Possessing me,
A thousand years time dimension
In subconscious incarceration,
My hatred to man has transformed me,
Into a habitation for demons” where I cant flee

Umm, Do you not like what I just said?
Im sorry but these are examples of lyrics that our rappers spread,
The list could go on,
You can go search em’ up if you think im a con
We have kids listening to such songs,
And teens that follow them rappers on twitter, instagram, from the United States to Hong Kong,

Yet you dare say I spread violence and hatred?
I am Islam, a religion with a text so sacred,
My name means peace, that is what I preach,
To be kind to all mankind, that is what I teach,
But my words are manipulated,
And with ignorance they are tainted,

You see the word “fight” in my text and oh my god it becomes a big fuss,
Have you ever tried listening to me or discuss?
Cuz’ I’ll never ask you to ****, or to swear,
I tell you to treat your elderly, kids, and women with care,
And to love for your brother what you love for yourself,
But most importantly, never hurt ones self,

Yet they still continue to attack me with my verses
“**** them where you find them and drive them out”
But Lets be honest here, if someone were to attack you, you would try to defend yourself with no doubt

For these verses were for the times of war,
To defend ones self , nothing less nothing more,
I mean even in America it is legal for a cop to shoot and **** to protect their life or the life of another
So what makes it any different when I tell my followers to take shield and to cover?

My text Quran is always compared with the Holy Bible,
They say the Holy Bible has no violence but mind to explain:

“Do not spare them, but **** both man and woman, child and infant, ox and sheep, camel and donkey”, From Samuel 15:3

Or “Happy is he who repays you for what you have done to us- he who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks” from Psalm 137:9, you see thats the key,

They say my woman are oppressed,
Because of the way they are dressed,
But I taught them that they are precious,
Like diamonds and pearls they are auspicious,

Yet they have a heard voice,
To wear a veil or not to wear they have the choice,
And again I am compared to the Holy Bible and Christianity,
All the NUNS are covered from head to toe,
But when it comes to Muslim woman WOAH,
They are suppressed,
But you got it wrong, every woman is a blessing and they are all blessed,

So stop talking about me as if you know it all,
This world is building between us such a huge wall,
And this was only to clear a few misconceptions,
From this universe that is full of deceptions,

And If we look closely we realize we are more alike than different,
In a nutshell, I am Islam, the munificent.
I respect each and every different religion the SAME.
Red Brush Jan 2019
The day from sunrise
Cuts sharply with light.

The night in dark guise
Hides all from the sight.

Between them but lies
The gilded lie, twilight.
Rezium Jan 2019
21
A game of chance,
But a game of smarts.
So easy to play but easier to lie.
It's not your first time is it?

Not mine.

So great to see you again.
I know you've seen me even now and then. Yet you act like you're some stranger who's never been around.
Such a card.
I can't tell if you're 1 or 11
Switching back and forth till you've become aware of...

''Coffee?"
All we see is two.  But she doesn't know I see 4
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