,,Do not cry“
But what if I want to?

,,Behave“
But what if I don´t want to?

I always tried to hold back my tears
My mind full of voices
Which tried to blame me
My feelings always drowned
In the fear of displeasing others

It might be my last challenge
I am worthy
Worthy to feel
Worthy to show

I will cry, scream and weep
In their faces

Sadness will be my guest

For a moment
For a day
For a week
As long as it takes

I won´t swallow any more
I will spit it all out
No matter if you like it or not

So take my tears
Take my smile

It will be different tomorrow
Nothing stays the same

I refuse to hide my change
I refuse to hide my emotions

You may leave if you dislike it
Because I won´t give up on my path

I won´t give up on my choices

Slowly saving
patiently waiting
email received transaction confirmed
item conceived, time contracted
a gift for one, many or all
a package surely to befall
a package arrives as the sun rises
it finally comes, joy
it fills us as we tear it apart "oh boy!"
help yourself, its ok to treat yourself
again save and order
await the presents that cross borders
happiness from innocent pleasures
isn't that a great treasure

Never ceases to amaze.
The mentality of the masses,
Their world in a daze.

Devoid of all nerve.
Following orders blindly,
Happy to serve.

Their's is not to question why.
Swallow all the *******,
Conform and then die

Odd flashes of light blurring everything
Uncomfortable in my skin
Hearts about to implode
with megatons behind it
Colors smearing together as I blink
Just one little pill
"to even you out."
"It'll make you happy again."
Make them happy is what it seems
           Kick this habit            
my happiness means nothing
you are in very serious trouble Muscles tightly constricted  Hands turn from gods gifted tools to
useless mangled mounds of bone and flesh and just like that it seems to slow and sputter to a halt.
Nothing like was mentioned on the label.