Fixated on the idea of stillness,
While my existence ceases to stand still.
Four past a dozen years of sanity,
but insanity becomes my will.
Is it faith that lyes within?
Or is it time to turn out the light?
Impervious to fulfillment,
Emulating a personality I could only dream of.
The mask became too tight,
and the match eventually burnt out.
Uncontrollable perturbation seemed,
Like a pit that had no bottom.
With emotional *******,
letting it escape was difficult.
Fear of judgement,
that comes from the outsider's force.
Smiling at the frowns inside,
denial took its course.
With a heart of gold,
and pride the size of the earth.
This name of mine should live on,
but had already been a memory at birth.
The final sleep could be near,
but the awakening could be so.
It could very well interfere.
Yet it is very well doubtful,
Through my eyes though.
Ashamed of what might come,
if my emotions pilot my soul.
This aircraft is running out of fuel,
and my fear to move on has dilated.
These roots are growing rapidly,
like a **** in the season of the sun.
My emotions are exploding,
Like a bullet escaping a gun.
God forgive this sinner,
Who sins for the worthy of life,
These words are cutting deep,
Deep through me like a knife.
A child at heart,
With a wise tale to tell.
My world is spinning rapidly,
My head is clanging like a bell.
A moral man in a corrupt world,
I portray a shakespearian player.
Soliloquies in character,
But this character is myself,
Myself is he,
The player.
In the final fall of the curtain,
I soon am ready to bow,
The crowed is loudly silent,
it is time to say goodbye now.
