Instead of inspiring a feeling,
I want to share a feeling.
Never mind what you wanted
to feel when you read this.
I'm selfish.
Feel what I'm feeling
as I write
and not what you feel
as you read this right now.
I should probably share with you
how I'm feeling.
I should have probaby have
told you before
we got this far.
I bet at this point
you don't even know
how to feel.
Good.
Neither do I.

When I was a little boy biking through the lush greeneries of our local park,
I fell down and scraped my knee.
Tears in my eyes, with blood coming out of the tear on my leg, I came to my parents.
Their reaction at first was what I had expected. Shock and fear for their son’s well-being came to their faces, but after realizing I was mostly okay, they uttered a line I still remember quite clearly.

It went like this:

“At least it’s just a scratch.”

And so with that began a life of “at leasts” and compromise.

“At least you passed the test”
“At least you made it on time”
“At least you were only late to the first 30 minutes of the movie”
“At least you were able to cram your homework”
“At least you managed, somehow, some way”
“At least you didn’t die”
“At least you were given part of what you wanted”

Part of what I wanted.


Now, I’ve grown wise enough to know that you aren’t always going
To attain or achieve everything you desire.
But when life always sells you short, you lose hope

But the most cruel "at least" that life decided to bestow upon me was...

“At least…. You met her.”

Yup.

The compromise was I couldn’t have her
I couldn’t make her my home
Because she was never there to stay.
“At least, you met her”

It was a tragedy
But a part of her will always remain
Because that part of her, no matter how small
Somehow changed something in me-
And, dear god, I hope it’s for the better.

The wind howls my name,
whispering loudly for me to come home,
beckoning me back to the place where I’m from,
reminding me that nothing stays the same,

Moon in the sky my only friend,
on this Highway living life my way until the dead end,
I do not ignore death I’ve even tried suicide before,
but it’s not my time to go yet there’s more emotions to explore,
more words to write more messages to translate,
so sorry I’m not sorry Death will have to wait,

it’s late,
it’s early,
head in the clouds,
mouth taste all earthy,
the winds howl for me to come home,
whispering my name out loudly,

as I write with this anxious uneasy feeling,
from a mind that can’t settle and just keeps writing,
head so hot whole mind melting,
but emotions so cold that they’re biting,

bought the whole farm,
but at least it was turnkey,
to himself he’s a harm,
should be strapped to a gurney,
use me please abuse me please,
do anything except hurt me,

the winds howl proudly,
whispering loudly for me to come home,
beckoning me back to the place where I’m from,
reminding me that nothing stays the same…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

A glowing presence appeared before me; was I awake or was I asleep?
I thought her first a stranger; she wasn't a stranger at all.
“What is your name?” I asked. She answered: “My name is Photon.”
I thought how weird a name to be called.

“Who are you and where are you from?”
…thinking how mysterious she was.
“I was discovered over a million years ago,
and abide by whomever gives me cause!”

“You have known me all your life.” she exclaimed.
“I am powerful, mighty, and transcendent.
If not tamed, I deliver widespread loss and destruction.”
“Only God is omnipotent and omnipresent!” I clamored.

“That is true; but I was created that way for a reason.
Mistreating me results in death; respect me, and you will rejoice.
I can be a good servant, or a cruel master.
It is you who must make the choice.”

“Are you some kind of a god? Seemingly irritated she replied:
“I am not! The power lies in your hands, not mine!
You decide to use me for good or for bad. I must respond to both.
I can be a friend or foe...bring darkness or cause a light to shine.”

As her illumination began to dissipate, I  asked:
“Where do you go from here?” “All over! My work will never end.
My task is be a companion forever, to those who chose not to believe...
but the true, righteous, and faithful, they shall never see me again.”

“Just one more question,” I pleaded, 'before you go, tell me:
who are you really, and when will you again transpire?'
“I travel the world over and manifest wherever I am called.
My name is Photon; but I'm mostly known as fire!”


By Milton Lopez Delgado
May 16, 2016

never was i
going to be held by the throat
ever again,
played with a leash
like a mindless dog

i was wiser than that

but son, when love strikes
your supposed wisdom is met
and negated by
a dash of crazy
a hint of impulse
that, dear, oh dear
lead to
a multitude of reckless decisions.

but maybe that's the way
life's meant to be lived

take a risk

when i looked at what i had been writing
i came to the realization that
i had been trying, so desperately
to mask my insecurities and trials
with sweet poetry and prose

why do i still try to hide
what i feel, on this anonymous poetry account

this hiding has gone far beyond just the reaches of the internet
it has pervaded into each sector of my life

i. i hide from myself

i fool myself with forced optimism
and the mentality that
my wounds are nothing but shallow scratches
that, if it can't be healed with time, then
it can be healed with adjustment and moving on

ii. i hide from others

i pretend, that they, too are fooled
by my obvious act
as i push everyone away
with lies of
"i'm fine" and "i'm okay"

why can't i come out of hiding

A hand touched my shoulder...
Are you here for the art thing?
What art thing?
You shall see...
Now
I
Would
Like
To
Pause.
When you have no clue what you are doing.
Why you are there.
When you got there.
How you got there.
That is strange.
Now
We
Resume.
This girl touched my shoulder.
We exchanged words.
Then I woke up.

When ascertaining the future over a period of time it is realized that the present has become a thing of past, from then onwards it must be understood that it's time now to return back to the present moment in time because that is where life exists.

When ascertaining the future over a period of time it is realized that the present exists not only because of what happened in the past, but also because the past played a major role in shaping the present.

When ascertaining future over a period of time it must be realized that everything done in the present will shape the future accordingly with what you like, what you want, what you have got in your mind and not necessarily what you demand.

Quite essentially the only thing that must be always remebered and kept in mind is that everything belongs to the present moment in time, it's always better to remain with the present moment in time and continue along with the same in mind.

It's then, at that point in time realized that life can be very much interesting.