I think I’m living in a box,
trying to hide from you.
I don’t like to lie,
but what is true anymore?
I’m sick to my stomach
that you can think of me,
claiming me as yours,
when you didn’t work for anything.

I feel like trash, I feel like dirt.
Watching you take and take,
and just sitting there
with my eyes purposely closed.
I was so lonely, I didn’t know
what it felt like to really be touched.
So I let myself get shut
up inside this way.

You’re like a greedy child

who can’t keep their hands away.
You don’t keep your hands away.
And I feel useless.
Of course I’m one of those.
Of course I don’t leave.
And remember the little girl
who promised she’d never take this?

I see the light from outside,
but he’s not getting any closer.

I don’t have him.
I can’t have him.

I wish I had
The armor you keep on your heart
I would not have to worry
About Cupid’s shots
Like shooting stars
That I wish I could wish upon
But no
Arrow after heart shattering arrow
Leaving my chest
Tender and full of holes
And those holes
If they were to heal
I wish created thicker skin
To not let the same voids
Be made again
But instead I find
The feather ends
Sticking out
Making my love hideous
Like highway roadkill
Dare not look
Dare not touch
Dare not acknowledge
For I wish your feelings sparred
But yet I yearn for the day
That someone comes around
And love this mangled heart

It's been dark lately.

There's an object laying
In a small lavender box,
Behind a picture on my bookshelf.
It hasn't been touched in years.
Its been calling to me.
Pretending to be a siren,
Silver and shiny,
Longing for my blood to drip on it.
Singing that it's the only solution.

It's been very dark lately.
I'm terrified.

lost
Trapped in the shadows,
Banished to the darkest thoughts and memories.
is there a god to save me?
Been pushed back to far for you to pull me back to were i was,
im sick of being here alone,
cant find my way back home,
every move i make has got me stuck in the darkest place,
i feel as im being held at the end of my rope
i wanna believe that there is still hope,
every day i ask my self if this is real,
i wonder how long it will take for me to heal,
im feeling so cold,
Maybe I was born to walk this earth alone,
wondering im the darkness to find the light,
the light to guide me home.

I feel so empty,
My esteem's sore
That knife looks delicious
My nervous system begs no more.
Isolated,
I am the one who's different
Desolate
This chapter feels so hopeless