I loved you
as a thief
loves his secrets

buried you deep
where surface-level
lies
could hide you

I
wanted you
needed you
lost you
wanted you more
wanted you deeper
felt you
wanted you sorely
needy
I craved you
felt your lips
down my back
'tween my legs
on my soul
breathing into me
your spirit
your charm
your wit
your laughter

I'll never forget
your voice
the soothing grace
of how you felt
beneath me
in our dreams
in our living nightmare
of being alone
wanting
lying
falling asleep
in the arms of the ghosts
we've made
of each other...

History,
    is more about the time it was written,
    than the time it was written abart.

O Macedoniо, sister of Mysia and Thrace, why do you curse,
why do you so cruelly trample your children, to whom do you condemn them?
You are chasing your original Bulgarian blood, which way are you going?
Weep for the suffering of generations, don't deny it.
Don't hide your sorry past, don't hide it.

Deny your will to purify your consciousness.
Put out the fire of discord, shelter the spirits of our common history.
The past is the fuel of the future, the air of your breath.
Honor your heroes, don't divide the people and don't sow agony.
We know of your age-old torments, we hear your present sobs.

Macedonio, dear sister, you burn the memory of your children.
You drive your Bulgarian children out of the oven of your father's fire, you pour out duplicity. Why do you **** your history, why do you pour out wrong anger?
Your ancestors, the forgotten heroes, have left a memory of greatness.
Do you remember the ages bathed in masculine power and eternal glory?

Your children, an integral part of a long-suffering family, seek protection.
Have you forgotten that blood does not mix with water, and that the old Bulgarian thrones, with which fate has gifted you, rise near Vardar.
Know that a tree without its roots under the firmament perishes, and you yourself are too proud, without turning to your sisters you depress.

Macedonia, didn't your rebels lay down their bones for freedom?
Do not bury your Bulgarian memory, do not abuse your dear children with malice.
Don't forget your real enemy, and he is self-serving and conquers you.
Let your children grow in your springs, and when they grow up to rise up, with heroic strength to protect you from your evil ones.

People, do not stop seeking and asserting your true nature.
Remember the work of your ancestors, fight for their souls to rest.
Where songs are sung, where poems are read, life burns.
Voivodes are born to wash away the common shame and unite the people.
Heroes who will revive the fatherland from the ashes of the rout.

Where it has flowed, it will flow again..

I walk alone
For the sake of everyone I love and know
For the blush of unspoiled fruit
So we can walk out into the sun
Freemen and not slaves
So we can get out from under the thumb
Of oppressors who seek to keep us down,
For the Americas
My Americans
For her siblings, allies of dear note to
Fair Lady Columbia
For all that share in the rays of the cosmos
My friends, nature is so beautiful
And once was so full, in this world
Of all the things gone extinct
It is less they do not control
Remember, you too are an animal

History is like a mirror;
the closer you look,
the more you'll see things
that you don't want to see.
The more distorted the picture becomes.
But, if it's your history you're looking at,
the distortion offers a rare chance.
A chance to change the way
you look at your past.

This and my next two posts are in reverse creation order,
this is the last panel in a tryptic of three novel scenes.
------------ this was Feb, 22, 2024

Used to be, as we were
used to become, repeatedly,

time sensitives using time
as using any used concept, used
by users
to bring use to usefullness, in time.

As we are used, our complexities
crease our faces with wrinkles
we use to make smiles.

------------------

Thousands, now millions,
then billions and trillions, too much,
unhoned use, dull use, dishonest use

-busy work to earn right to life
-breathe,
-hard parts's over, let it roll....

so we stop counting hours per dollar
and marvel at the cost of being
obligated to share the debt,
owed gravity,
giving minutes where seconds are plenty,
about a dollar each…
converted on the exchange
in  second thoughts.

------------------

Right use,
righteous, right.

The ideal right. Never wrong.

Like sunshine, or stars…

and gravity, and contravening winds,
laws of temperature
and pressure, pre judged within tolerance
too minute to contemplate, indeed,

as with the inner working of everything,
once done, duration makes no sense,

to mortal sensibilities, our assisting intell
sources leak inside information, gut level

response to provocation, my vocation
manifests, yes, blurts

stop.
This is insanity, and I smile to myself,
aware,
I aimed at totally insane, and hit it,

on the spot, nailed it where up and down
cross left and right, there it was,

or is, more precisely, insanity. Stopped.

My self imposed duty done. I stopped it.

I am the monkey wrench. For a second.
Must mean...
-------------------
...
my tools include
sentient wrenches,
sentient plumber tools,
used artistically as the
monkey wrench
in the works
with an Iberian,
artist at café, in tiny
John Lennon glasses,
callouses on his *******...
real deal, pre Adobe Illustrator
whose pen and inks I think I saw,

but in another course through time,

historicity, in fact, is a material invention,
a feminine fullfilled mind's inspiration,

we exist in no time at all, from historical
perspectives exalted to points of view,

from which opinions as to how worth is
weight of something, relative to another.
Balance life in time on instants
in prayer, faith, step taken
instants thanking nexting
step by step, expecting next time….

Worth of a minute spent thinking second
thoughts used as tools, slight smile, soft aha,

leverage our speculation,
ask who has nothing
to do for days on end, but the wealthy good

among the commoner sorts and types and classes.

Weal and woe, both, we believe lack

recipes to fix broken promises to child prayers.

Blessedness declared, nationally.
Given in the ritual,
alright alrise, alrecite, I pledge…
--we did
yes, to ****, at the will of my commander,
and I understand my link to the chain,
--we
brains hardwired from childhood
to handle a pen,
experience ambidexterity while qwerty keying,
left and right,
order and beauty click, feel
minds combined.

We am I, and I am alone,
then I think of you, and now, and this device,

this magic pen, silly me,
anachronisms are my weakness.

We are the monkey wrench.