i once believed in my lifetime
that life is guaranteed with security
people tell me constantly
that i don’t have to ever worry
“the future’s vivid & bright,
no need to be in a hurry.”

until my wicked thoughts arrived without a warning
and slowly, transformed me into another being.
these thoughts lived a little too long inside me
before i even knew it, i then believed in them so badly.
doubt and questions clouded the once well-assured me
as i tried to live the illusion of my monstrosity.

will my mind ever taste the feeling of being free?

the answer came in a form of my identity’s inevitability:
that my mind’s only playing cruel tricks constantly;
the wickedness that i so preciously keep next to me
has never been the way i am supposed to be.
this revelation about the real me never came easy
but it has finally set my mind and heart free

Whoseforest

flames hail,
so They wail
in Whoseforest.

the smog of it all,
has the system dull
in Whoseforest.

wails of help resound,
but are Their voices really found?

a peasant man’s dime too little,
a wealthy man’s dime too many.
                                 lackthereof
the kings lounge
as scorn rages
and rages
and rages
in Whoseforest.

the peasants beg,
“your majesty!
choking up
our lungs,
Their lungs,
Her lungs.
this tragedy
is one of ours
of yours
deploy a strategy
have you not?”

the kings sit
with the wealthy
sipping tea
eyes lit
with lax smiles.

but just like Them,
their voices go
unfound.

peasant, wealthy, royalty
all born and bred
of the same ancestry
brothers cry,
but brothers stray

They too,
both and bred
of their ancestry
but descendants soon
fall flat

mother nature now speaks,
“for we are all born and bred
of the same hearth
should it not be our earth
to love and share?”
She,too, wails
for Whoseforest.

so tell me now,
whose forest?

This world is a sad and dangerous place
Everyone knows it, everyone feels it
The new year brings new disasters
2020 didn't even give us a minute
to catch our breaths

We have the possibility of facing
A new war with every passing minute
It seems a new shooting happens everyday
Australia is literally on fire
And what can we do?

We place our trust in our leaders
In our countries
To keep us safe
Placing blame on anyone but ourselves
Some pray for people to be good
Yet even churches are no longer safe
We hope for the world to cool and calm
But with everyday comes new calamity
And what can we do?

War is an idiots parade, and we don't have a say
We can't predict disaster
We can't predict who will lose their mind next
We aren't prophets
We don't know how to be safe anymore
Worst of all
We are too lazy and selfish to save our planet

We don't know what to do anymore
This world is falling apart
And what can we do?

This isn't a poem at all, I mean
  seriously,
There is no poem to be viewed here,  
If I was the police I'd be waving you
  on saying
"Please move on, there's nothing to be
  seen here,
No! there are no poems in this
  vicinity,
I'd be holding up a sign "No Poem here, please go elsewhere to view a
  real poem",
But I bet some of you out there are
  nodding your heads thinking
"Hey! This is something different, this
  is really good,  yea! really clever
He's saying there's no poem here
It's a poem about No poems
A poem saying it's not a poem when
  really it is a poem"

But it's not a poem, it's not!!! (the
  author)

But they'd retort "Yea! A poem going
  thru an existential crisis,
A poem that doesn't believe it's a
  poem
A 'ghost' poem, a haunted poem
The poem that never was
Like a ghost ship floating thru
  the mist
Brilliant! I see what you're doing
  here
Man, that's genius, High Art,
This could be the best ****** poem
  you've  ever written!"

But it's not a poem, it's not! It's a
  mistake, an error (the author again)
I was just amending an older poem trying to make it look better on the
  page
When the Site saved it as a new poem
But it wasn't a new poem, it was an
  old poem
So I went in and deleted all the text
  hoping it would delete the poem
It deleted the text of the poem but gave the poem a title called "Untitled",
And then people went in to view the
  poem entitled "Untitled"
And they found nothing there
And then they got onto me informing me that my poem called "Untitled"
Wasn't showing up on my page
And they thought the Site was acting up.
So I had to write this explaining how
  this wasn't a poem at all
But now you probably think  
  it is a poem
You'll be thinking, "Sure when it comes to Poetry anything goes
It's like Shakespeare, "to be or not to
  be
Poem or no Poem, that is the
  question"
The Ying... or the Yang.
But it's not a poem, it's not !!!
But then I bet I'll hear
" O yes it is, don't be modest now
What a great poem!!!
No, it's not! "Yes, it is!"
No! "Yes!" No! "Yes!"
You just can't win can you???

Tell me my purpose
If I was dead before I was born,
And will die when I am dead.

If death is immortal,
Eternal,
Necessary;
Yet life is frail,
Conditional,
Temporary.

Tell me why I am here
In my joy,
My fury,
My agony.

I suffer,
I change.
I am pushed to my limits and beyond
Burdened with freedom and empathy.

Tell me why I feel such emotions
That last
And alas
Here I am
Triumphant.

So
“Give me hell,
Give me heaven,
All your visions of life.”