Wise men teach us
to discuss
about how important is
to do some studies and analyses,
just to know,
where our roots came from.
So, I’ve done a DNA test.
Guess!

Are you aware
- do you really care -
that your destiny
is, as the wise men said, in history?
Don't you know?
Man, don't be low!
So, I’d enrolled in the army.
Funny?

I went to war
to save and protect my DNA's pure core;
Since then I do sins
and I ****
different types of enemies
with unknown identities.
That is my duty,
Isn't beauty?

Isn't fun?
But now, I'm done.
Guess what I think I am:
a cruel criminal?
a modest hero?
Anyway, nobody will see tomorrow
how I will vanished, surprisingly,
In a outlandish history.

before you
I was hitting carts on the occasional weekend
sorta disloyal to my boyfriend
had a hunger for bullets
that were just begging to fly
and everyday, fighting with my mom made me cry

but then you pulled up on the weekends
started showing me a better life
I was falling out of windows and climbing in your car
started going back to your place
******* off that one roommate
and doing **** I've never done before
we might have taken things too far

when you
pulled up and rolled up
we sparked up
and curled up
we never went out
stayed home
and made out

and we crossed a good line or two
or three
but what the hell
it never bothered me
until we cut a good line or two
or three
soon enough I wasn't only smoking ****
I still thinks its funny how you don't like to drink

Many days and many nights I couldn’t reach catharsis.
Narcissistic dialogue and lust was how it started.
Lust for power,
Lust for ***,
I balanced on the wire.
Built my tower,
Learned to flex,
Never thought I’d tire.
While looking for a diamond crown I made my way to glory:
Carved a track through youthful bliss all while writing my own story.
From troubled teen
To filled with dreams,
I formed the squad into a team.
I wouldn’t scream when things got tough;
I’d always keep composure.
Intelligent with malevolence
Was how I’d learned to soldier.
No disclosure,
Never trust,
Looking to manipulate.
Made it known
It was a must
For opponents to capitulate.
Things were moving well enough
When dear old lust in whom we trust…
Reappeared back on the scene,
And of my feathers
Began to preen.

So,

Doubled down,
Went for the crown.
Changed the crew,
Time it flew.
Golden status
Seemed so near,
But red and blue
Were in the mirror
News had spread;
My walls were breached.
Of loss I had no knowledge.
Prison bread;
Amongst the freaks.
Twenty-five for living lawless.
For God had turned and dealt a blow
For all of those bad seeds I’d sewed.
And blow for blow
In social woe
I’ve lived my life in shackles.

room full of smoke

i didn't know beds could be this comfortable
i didn't know you could be this sweet
i didn't know a lot of things before hitting that blunt

but you showed me everything

you showed me another world that i've never seen
you showed me the beauty i didn't know i had
you showed me pleasure i didn't know existed

but you scared me

you drove 40 miles over the limit
you handed me a gun that still had a bullet in it
you wrapped your hand around my throat and squeezed

and i'm scared because...
i loved it.
i've never met that side of me.

Black boy stripped of his innocence.
Black boy denied his right to be a kid.
Black boy labeled since birth.
Black boy criminalized.
Black boy stereotyped.
Black boy violated.
Black boy silenced.
Black boy monitored.
Black boy put into a box.
Black boy seen as a menace.
Black boy forced to grow too fast.
Black boy with his back to the world.
Black boy, you are loved
Black boy, you are a prince
Black boy, you are beautiful
Black boy, you are smart and worthy.
Black boy, go on and speak your truth.
Black boy, go on and dance.
Black boy, go on and sing.
Black boy, go on and paint.
Black boy, go on and be a kid.

PTSD is a form
Of stress, anxiety, and worry
It is not a flipping
Excuse to
Act like animal
So criminals grow up
And admit you faults
Cause this is
******* me off.