Don't forgive me because I cried
Don't forgive me "even though" I lied
Don't forgive me because I'm a kid
Don't forgive because you could've done what I did
Allow me to face my consequences
Let me adapt to my circumstances
Don't allow me my relapses
Let me feel guilt in my synapses
Please don't forgive me because I apologized
Please don't forgive unless I realized
The wrongs I did
And the wrongs I said
The crimes I hid
And the crimes I fed

Please don't forgive me
Because I seem to feel guilty
Please don't forgive me
Because my eyes went all "melty"
Please don't forgive me

Never think that something in life will change on it’s own,
since nothing happens on it's own and everything that happens in life has got a reason of it's own.

Never think that something in life will change on it's own
Never does it happen on it’s own
Never did it happen in the past,
nor will it happen again in present.

Life changes according to what you want,
how you want and all that you have got in your mind.
Life changes according to how you have thought, carefully planned and all the things that you have got and done in life.

However, the world outside is a fast changing place
So it’s always better to be who you are,
especially when it comes to dealing with everything in your own life,
which as of now in the present has a concern.

Do what you want,
in doing so always remember,
future will hold the consequences of all the action taken in present.

Desire and dreams will remain in present and also in future, however, over a period of time it’s always realized that future remains uncertain.
An uncertain future has got all the potential capacity to keep the present on hold; however, the same thing is true in case of odds.

The desire to get something done in a certain way must also be followed by the drive to achieve the same
Once the thing that is desired is achieved, then it is realized that the world outside is pretty much different and that life is better than what you had thought prior.

She doesn't realise I'm madly in love with her.
She's so in love and it's beautiful
and it kills me...
I guess it's all out there now. ****.

It's a dreary day here today
With malicious actions; what more can I say
finished my hit list; no one else to betray
So let the Solitude come my way
These walls have become my cell, just pass me my tray
I'm doing some thinking; night into day
i hope your sorrows are shrinking away
Now, have a blessed day....

I could’ve done the right thing
Many moons ago
If only I could’ve understood
How my heart, I could follow

I didn’t know myself enough
Yet denied it when you claimed to
I was afraid to let myself in
Always thought, maybe it’s too soon

I knew when something didn’t feel right
I could feel my skin shiver and my bones tremble
I could never tell what, precisely,
Whatever the truth was, often remained a jumbled mumble

I went so far away to find myself
Days and nights I cried in emptiness
That’s when I understood myself
Then it was clear that you and I are the oneness.

I’m grateful for the struggle
For without it, I wouldn’t have travelled so far

I’m regretful for the pain
For because of it, I have travelled away so far

I’ve accepted my slow growth as this is who I am
For because of it, I have travelled so close

I admit my greatest gain today – You,
For because of you, I have found myself.

Each day is different,
Even though they all seem the same.
Everyday we make a different but yet an identical choice,
Which will always affect the other choices we make.

Day by day,
We grow, we become wiser,
No.
We become more aware of the consequences of our choices,
We learn from our passed experiences.

The days passing by now,
All seem to be the same,
Or is it because I am the same,
I have done it all,
Lived it all,
But yet i have a lot more consequences to go through.
Yes, some more choices to be  made,
All i have to do now is observe how i live,
Day By Day.


                                                          ­                                      Jonesy 2016 ©

Haha... this is gonna be funny.
Get to tomorrow and all comedic value is lost.
A lot of things are like this:
the UK leaving EU,
what we talked about on the coach yesterday
or what was said in the (really ****) hotel,
that photo on snapchat everyone saw.
All of these regrettable yet they happened and left consequences to deal with.
It may lead to someone loosing their job or being humiliated.
But NOTHING CAN BE DONE!
Things are regrettable but they cannot be change.

They will write entire novels based solely on your eyes, create depths of intangible intimacy that can only result in displacement.

You will come to know of death before death.

They will dip their fingers in your blood and paint diagrams of love across your chest. You will transform into artwork, a selfish inspiration.

On nights that end in benevolence, they will be too frightened to speak; and you will never understand.

You will learn how to break, but more like waves and less like porcelain.

They can feel agony far beyond your compression. Your silence will be substance for extinction, *and a poet never forgets.

since when were we taught to hate ourselves?
our body, to hate the skin we were born in?
to hate the thickness of our stomach
and the freckles on our cheeks
to hate the curls in our hair
and the size of our thighs

since when was loving ourselves not right
not acceptable or appropriate?

since when was it okay to slice our thighs or our wrists?
to feel the blood ease out of our skin and run down our leg

since when was it okay to take our own life?
to sit in a bathtub and swallow ninety pills
to take a gun to our head without thinking about the regrets
to jump of a bridge thinking we can fly

but we can't
we shouldn't,
we shouldn't try to fly
we should think about the consequences instead

we should love ourself the way we are
we should love ourselves,
our hair and our eyes
the size of our waist
and the thickness of our thighs

we should take a breath
take a step back
and breathe
take your time and relax until you realize your worth,

your beauty
and ability
to smile.