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Mariah 5d
Can't you see me
Can't you see
How its supposed to be
You had to teach me

A burdensome chore
You chose to ignore
So you left me alone
Wondering why I did so on my own

Now I know nothing
I'm always running
Under the pressure
I'm crumbling

The unformed person
Hiding behind the curtain
Ashamed of being the burden

Now you can't see-
but when you think of me
I'm gone and you're still  
Hating me  

How I'm ought to be
It isn't clear to me
And I'm sure you'd happily agree
I am lost at sea

You were so headstrong
About knowing all along
I was unworthy and ugly, loud and wrong
Now I suffer
Nowhere to belong

You can no longer tell me to go
This is my home
Piece by piece, blood and bone
I built it on my own  

You know of my unbearable pain
Trying to live life your way
And you know I couldn't stay
When you were the one sending me away

I don't want to grow old
With my life feeling cold
All thrown away
Feeling myself decay

Its not my responsibility
Your incivility
Never a child to you,
But a void of hostility

Your high horse far away from me
And I know,
that even though
I can't see you looking down
It is a certainty

Creative were your reasons
To deny the diseases
That plagued our house of stalled seasons
So look away, so you don't need to believe in
The winter that we lived in

Deny deny deny
The distance between you and I
Came from you and your willingness to
Misidentify
"This child is not mine,
It chooses to defy,
Theres rot inside"
And I can never be satisfied
With your answers when I ask why

"You you you
You chose to do
Everything bad that happened to you"

How could I
When I was the child in knots
And you were the tie

If I am a bad egg and I am rotten
Then you were the broken,
beaten down fridge that I was in
For my mother.
I never wished it of you, but I will die someday, just like you want me to.
And maybe then, you could finally be proud.
Or at least, you could finally stop haunting me.
Debbie Apr 3
Every forest harbors secrets.
The bark and branches are the keepers.
The abandoned house towered,
in a paralysis of time.
The only thing alive
was the strangling of the vines.
It stood in dilapidation
with a menacing expression.
Inside the air thick with voiceless confessions.
Heard somewhere in my shaking soul.
Hollow window eyes
possess the shatters of time.
Who were the inhabitants?
And are they alive?
It's time to go inside.
I like abandoned places.
Windows out,
touched by time’s cruel mouth
nibbling smoke blackened corners,
wheezing gently
whittled roof long gone,
bound by tangled thread
drawn from the looms it held,
past is present, present is past
forever intertwined
memories lost, unheard stories
former glories
very rarely brought to mind
Ione Mar 31
They say go with the flow-
but I'm just a stagnant water.
Not a beauty, nor a worth-
all the fishes have left the water.
ibraheem Mar 20
Take me into your arms.
Bury and bathe my mind till the thoughts drown and quiet.
Trap me in the world of you; enclose my mind from the world around us.

Free me of thought.
Hold me, dear. Hold me tight.
Never let go—your grip on my mind, loosen not.

Have I not suffered through young and old?
Have I not let my mind run free,
to build forsaken paths I worry to walk?

Hold my memories. Hold them close.
Care for them as I for you.

How must I beg to be abandoned?
Oh, how I dream to be abandoned
by the parts of me I carried not with love,
but with hatred.

When what built you crumbles you,
your eyes meet hypocrisy,
till driven outside the simplistic gates of sanity.

For here, I am not asking you for your love, nor your time.
I come to ask for neither.

I ask for nothing but my freedom,
which you unwillingly, unknowingly carry—
not a key, nor words,
but a chaste of the mind,
which you force upon me.
My whole life I have been set in second place,
And yet I still think to myself “is it really that bad?”
But now i wallow, and I come face to face,
Face to face with anger, denial and sad.
Even my own father chose his addiction over me,
He made his decision when I was just a baby.
He would cancel his child maintenance,
Just so he could afford his bad habits,
But I got used to his unfaithfulness,
He takes the joy from the world like a leeching maggot,
So what would you choose,
Ecstasy or me?
I give you the choice to not be some dumb ****,
But I know what you you’ll choose,
Not me, but a drug.

-anonymous poet.
My dad was never a dad, just a father,
Never resembling a father figure, just existing.

His voice is gruff and deep,
Every time I hear it, I can't help wondering,

"Why is he so detached?"
"Why does he keep his distance?"

I thought he was supposed to love me unconditionally,
To always be there for me,
To offer a shoulder to cry on in hard times,
But instead he abandoned me.
Jeremy Betts Jan 10
Finally,
So not all of a sudden but gradually,
It's been proven systematically
Everybody WILL leave me
And no,
I'm not a fortune teller phoney
Want proof?
Well,
That's easy
Follow closely
A quick peek and you'll see
Everyone has left me
The problem is me,
Obviously,
Self doubt has it's very own key
But here's what gets me,
When I want to leave me
Suddenly
That's another something wrong with me
You don't want me
I don't want me
How do those conclusions land differently?
Identical mindsets but yours are worthy
Of walking away unapologetically
Levitating an old issue like I've lost gravity
But still wound up in the devils proximity
Clearly
I'm the only one not allowed to not want me
Love it's self is a fallacy
Someone needs to explain that duality

©2025
I'm finding it impossible to shake this mindset
Francesca Dec 2024
Three dinner mats are placed,
Carefully laid, evenly spaced.

A candle lit warmly,
The ironic sense of home in a way.

Cutlery shining, stating its place,
Though one seems to have been erased.

They're four people,
In this place called home.

The candle was not lit for me,
Bright, present but unknown.

Yet you say its best to leave me alone,
For i am damaged, very unknown.

So I linger, as they're three dinner mats instead of four,

Maybe in another life you will notice me some more.
Jay Dec 2024
Who am I? I feel adrift, lost in an endless sea of nothingness. This doesn’t feel like my family anymore. They no longer need me, life has carried them forward, leaving me behind. I feel stranded, unmoored, just a distant fragment of their past. The relentless tide of time has swept them away, while I remain frozen, anchored in place. This house, once alive with laughter and warmth, now echoes with memories of a life I barely recognize. Each of them has moved on, their chapters turning, their stories evolving. I don’t blame them for leaving me behind, but the emptiness weighs heavy. It’s been so long since this truly felt like a family. Now, all that’s left are shadows, slipping just beyond my grasp. Am I a relic? A fading remnant of what used to be? I reach for them, but the distance between us is insurmountable, a chasm carved by time, widening too quickly for me to cross. While their lives tick forward, mine stands still, stagnant and silent. I ache for purpose, for a place to belong. A void stretches within me, yearning to be filled. Perhaps one day I’ll find the shore I’ve been seeking, a place to rebuild, to heal, to feel whole again. For now, I watch as they drift further away, my soul burning in place like a solitary beacon. Through this endless night, I remain, lost yet hopeful, waiting to one day be found.
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