Roll it Lights out Whiskey sour As I relive my incandescent whims My life condensed to reels and reels Of illusions I stare in the darkness at squandered youth A cinema of one Coming undone The glass falls to the floor Echoes in the night, Ekerö's in the night Oland also, ancient islands dancing out of sight Islands kissing, waters whisper rippling My sadness wrapped around A prism in time The director holds me bound Movies never end Until the obituary comes a singing At the door, never to be opened
We used to be four Ancient voices Existing no more
Never refuse the last dance, hold onto dreams, and rommance
I hold these truths to be self evident I love she who is always prevalently in my life She's in my thoughts all over my mind Widespread wild shrunk into one cranium. This is why I can't contain any of them. I'm addicted to you, fren. I can't tell you I love you, but I did just then 9 hours 4 minutes and 30 seconds. When. Time flies when the feelings are reckless. My minds straight but my heart feels hectic In love like never before what the heck man. It's perfect it's a symphony neglected We hear the music but keep it on the low but the instruments remain respected. I feel higher than ever in the passenger seat, listening to ABBA or other more obscure beats. Going to burger king where we dipped both our feets in the idea of love, where you first kissed me. Then our chicken nuggets, so saucy. bb. After hanging by the streams my brain was fried- my thoughts flossing Felt safe because I remember that you never lost me.
O Lord, Abba Father, Forsake me not, Hear my anguished cry! How long will i wait? Before You... See the crater That is my heart? Feel its jagged edged agony? Taste the bitter bile?
Engulfed in depression, Drenched in the Gulf of Grief, I stare at the Abyss of Hopelessness, Contemplating a Chasm of Sorrow too wide to cross. My sleeplessness witnesses Moonless nights, Starless skies. Scorching morns, Rainless noons, Song less days.
Deafened by the clamour, Prayers and Praise elude me, Silhouettes of Hope seem distant. Soothe away my heart scars, Seal my bleeding wounds Send away this void! Fill me with the Balm of Your Grace, Kiss of Your Mercy, Gift of Your Peace, Ecstasy of Your Presence! Touch me! Heal me! Make me whole!
To spiritually photoshop, or not to spiritually photoshop: that is a recurring question. I’ve gotten pretty good at cropping and resizing to keep an impressive façade, but the emptiness behind it is the telling thing, telling me that something about the life I’m living is off the tracks. I’m not the biggest fan of mirrors but I realize they do serve a purpose: showing me the reality, the real me. I’m a ragamuffin, always have been, and yet You love me, the real me. Amazing.
An except prayer from Brennan Manning's "Dear Abba" devotional.