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sab ariana Oct 2020
i feel the pain of hunger
but i can't eat
i hear my stomach calling out to me
but i can't eat
i can possibly force down something sweet
but i can't eat
look at what you've done to me
at least i can still sleep
i havent ate in a long time but i do be sleeping for hours
sab ariana Oct 2
thanks to you i can be anything
i have the power of all human beings
all is one
all is one
all is one
sab ariana Sep 2023
if only you could read my mind
you would read
the sweetest description of you
sab ariana Aug 2023
you want commitment?
i think its too soon
you said you’re so glad you found me
but now you’re feeling down
clown, clown, clown
sab ariana Oct 2020
there's a battle going on inside my mind
i dont know what is real
i dont know what thoughts are mine
constant gunfire
everything moving except for time
the casualties are high
i gather and lay our dead in a line
my brain is bleeding
its turning more sour than a lime
i'm going insane
trying to replace what i can't find
sab ariana Oct 2020
the violence brewing inside me boils and catalyzes the birth of malice,
from my womb of darkness;
i can not feel the pain anymore.
my heart in chaos.
my consciousness slipping away from me.
i pray to be born again:
no longer human,
no longer who i am.
sab ariana Aug 2023
body parts are scattered

i collect you
i put you back together

your limbs are torn and tattered
but i still love you

a little formaldehyde will make you better
sutures rip through

and im still stuck on you
funeral home blues
sab ariana Oct 2020
i just want to be held
thinking of you
i can't help but to miss
the way that it felt
sab ariana Sep 2023
a shadow figure
a distant friend
window man wants to be my end
window man hates to see me try
window man loves to see me cry
as above so below
window man entangles with my soul
man in the window watches me
sab ariana Oct 2020
i am waiting for you
to get out of my head
i am waiting for you
to come see me in bed
and after our fun
well grab a gun
splatter the walls red
it will be delicious
a mouthful of lead
together forever
now that were both dead
contrary to what i say, i really don't want to die. i promise, i couldn't even hurt a fly. let alone you. i want you to live for as long as you can. because the world needs you my precious man.
sab ariana Oct 2020
i'm on a drug binge
poison leaking from me like i'm singed
singed is a character from league of legends, he leaks out this poisonous gas. after a long night of hard drugs i feel like poison is leaking from my pores much like that guy.
sab ariana Oct 2023
rapid rush
freedom takes courage
warfare violence swiftness
im in this

a hanged man
i must choose to suffer
my punishment is my lover

i release you
im free from you

now the sun engulfs me
the chariot entropies
triumph victory
the end of my misery

my love you were a test from god

to let go of the one i adored
to be blessed with my reward

reborn now as the princess of swords
sab ariana Oct 2020
meow meow
i just want to lie in your bed
i want you to give me a little pat
right on top of my head
yeah you can play your games
just tell me im a good girl
well, thank you for the treats
ill just lie here in your bed
oh, no i dont mind
drinking some of your milk instead
ew this one is gross hahahahah i spent a week in this guys bed we didnt leave the house at all and he played video games the whole time but he bought me a lot food we didnt even really talk i felt like a pet cat just sleeping in his bed all day he would give me good cuddles when hed finally get off his **** computer and come to bed at night ugh am i crazy or is he idk someone please tell me
sab ariana Oct 2
i felt *****

i tried to clean myself
so i drank some bleach
honey you know me
i guess it was a reach

but i told you this
i wont slit my wrists
baby you know me
im a fool
i cant follow rules

im feeling sick
sick from it
sick of it

let me tell you this
my last kiss
everything ends
and nothing exists
sab ariana Sep 2023
i have no regrets in lending you my heart
but i have to take it back now
sab ariana Aug 2023
a wave that crashes over me
it drowns me violently

the salty water burns
my nose my throat i choke

and they cant hear me scream
but i still beg and i still plead
i started drinking again
sab ariana Aug 2023
i want to squeeze myself
between your gap teeth
i want all of your dreams
to be about me when you sleep
sab ariana Aug 2023
there's someone living inside of me
my friends think it's just the poppy seeds
all of them talking down on me
like they're occupying hockey seats
i'm telling you
there's more than just one part of me
it feels like my souls been split
possibly for three
this is the dilemma i face
exhaustion always awaits
if man is 5 then why am i 8?
sab ariana Oct 2020
three of swords
my mother called me a *****
three of swords
he said he loved me he swore
three of swords
he pushed me down to the floor
three of swords
i've turn rotten right to the core
three of swords
life has become such a chore
three of swords is a tarot card, it's an image of a large bleeding heart with three swords piercing it, in the background of the picture you can see stormy weather. i have it tattooed on my arm, i do have a big heart with a lot of love to give. i love love. i love being in love, i grow and thrive through love. i think i'm strong and i have overcome a lot of hurt in my life. but unfortunately there are some traumas from my past that are stuck in my heart like a knife. i just keep bleeding.
sab ariana Oct 2020
please make it stop
the pain of a beating broken heart
why wont it stop?
nothing is moving
except the hand on my clock
when will it stop?
it's unbearable
terrible
maybe i can rip it out
or drive a stake through it?
something please make movement
everything is so still
am i alive?
have i died?
all the days they seem to blend
will this pain not go away
not even at the end?
god make it stop
**** me if i'm not already dead
someone please
i'm begging you take my head
sab ariana Oct 2020
darker than black
my mind turns
as every memory rips through me
torn tendons broken bones
i fall apart
as the icy cool smoke
escapes my tortured body
an inferno ignites inside me
through a baptism of fire
whispers from my past fade away
i rise from the ashes
this time with a vengeance
that will burn anyone it catches
i am born again
sab ariana Oct 2020
i asked him do you believe in fate?
i always give more than i take
tell me what it is you hate
can’t stand my friends they're all so fake

i know you want me dead
why don't you just take my head?

i know that you want to **** me
but i just want you to feel me

up and down my mood swings
im so dumb when i do these things
im so numb after all these drinks

now tell me will you be my end?
i just need a friend
lets play pretend

im okay
my stream of thoughts
sab ariana Apr 2021
im out of my mind
youre wasting my time
so please leave a message
or ill see you in heaven

he said it was a mistake
he said it was fake
he said he has a girl at home
and that he cant go on
i hope you understand

well i understand
i was just a toy
for another broken man

so i spiral down again
so i feel bad again
the sky turns ruby red
thanks to you my darling
1st time i was intimate with a man in over a year he did not text me the next day and i waited and waited and waited finally i texted him like ?? hello i don’t appreciate all these hickeys you left on me and he was like im sorry i didnt mean for that to happen i have a girlfriend -_- **** ME
sab ariana Oct 2020
i don't know if its love or lust
but you make me feel something
and that's rare
emptiness drugs and depression
are all ive ever known
to be fair
time goes by
i can tell by the colors of the seasons
i still don't know who i am
but at least with you
i have a reason
sab ariana Aug 2023
im sorry…
i have been
in a really bad head space
the past few days
like sylvia plath
sticking her head in an oven
type of bad
sab ariana Nov 2020
in the void
the darkness
the sapphire shadows below
i have waken soon all of mankind will know
from the waters i rise
to bring you a cold wet demise
the tides they turn  the moon she burns
the great flood is here
the ground soaks in the oceans tears
oh my followers they wept
deep down in the depths
how long have i slept?
celestial dreams my planet of rings
judgment and their cries
"no one can escape her watchful eyes"
now that i am awake terra she shakes
man is five and yes i am eight
the tentacles from your nightmares
the dreams that you hate
the cleanse has begun
my song  is now sung
all hear my call
the great cthulhu brings you your fall
dun dun dunnnnn i was listening to the call of ktulu by metallica and idk i guess i got inspired
sab ariana Sep 2023
i don’t search for you
crescent moon
our love decays, half-life
freeman blue
my lonely doom

my missing slice
my pumpkin pie
sweet spice
our fingers entwined
cinnamon twist

i run from this
from my fate
from when we kissed
i run to a place  
past time, outside space

it takes away
your face
takes me back
to better days
it takes away
our separate ways
your way
away
half-life is a video game the main characters name is gordon freeman..
sab ariana Oct 2020
i want to run and jump
and land on that picket fence

i want the wooden point to go through me
i want my blood to splash
into my neighbors tea

i want to smash my face into your lens
i want the glass to cut my ears off
i want nothing to be left of my face
other than mushy and soft
sab ariana Oct 2020
in a field of babies breath
i see my angel
her emerald glare
bestows upon me
the end of my despair
beauty and love are mine
and i am hers
and through her fire
in magic chains to bind
throw mad desire
in this waste land
i can feel her grace

— The End —