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11.6k · Apr 2014
Decisions
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
3/5/2014

Decisions,
Directions,
Conflicts,
Connections.

Who's to say I know best?
Everyday is just a test.

To move or to stay.
To breathe or decay.
To love or abate.
To rebel or obey.
To commit or to stray.

Every kiss begins with K,
but then you factor in fate.
I lead a life of ambition,
with no room for indecision.
But I just don't know what's next.
All I do is try my best.

I can't complain or compare,
The results would be unfair.
I have lots, and others little,
yet life, still gets fickle.

I have little family and fewer friends,
who stay until the end?
I'm not worried or sad.
I just wish that I had:
stayed,
prayed,
paid,
or given away.

You live and you learn.
You decide and get burned,
but thus is life.
Everything happens for a reason.
We'll see what happens next season.

Time.
Time to pick.
Time to choose.
Time to stick.
No time to lose.

Compare.
Contrast.
Pro vs Con.

"Decisions, decisions."
I knew all along.
The first thing I've written this year that wasn't for work. Just venting the typical thought of a 20 something, "What's next?" Having more opportunities doesn't actually make it any easier. "But I digress..."
4.5k · Apr 2014
Eye Say Hello
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
8/9/2011

Just one quiet ride...
Neither knew we'd collide.
There I already sat,
Longing with, you to chat.

I guess it wasn't meant to be.
From where I sat I'd only see.
Your eyes and their sparkle,
Big and dark like charcoal.
We shared glances and eyes met,
I made you smile I bet.
I looked away fast,
Smiling away the past.
If only we had talked,
But opposite directions we walked.

One day I'll meet another.
But for now...
my heart had no druthers.
My eyes say hello
And yours say hi.
Quite a cute find
For such a short ride.

Just one quiet ride...
Neither knew we'd collide.
There I already sat,
Longing with, you to chat.

Fate didn't have us planned
I guess your in it's hands.
Au revoir pretty thing.
Here I sit, remembering.
8/9/2011
4.1k · Apr 2014
Worthy
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
12/16/11

One of these days,
I'll feel worthy.
One day soon,
I'll know surely.
Why do you,
Put me above?
How are you so,
Like a dove?
How could anyone,
Love a thing like me?
Who would deem me,
Worthy?
12/16/2011
1.4k · Apr 2014
Broken
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
5/20/12

Broken.
Broken hearted. Broken soul.
Broken will. Broken goals.

Never knowing where to start.
Never feeling not apart.
Never knowing where to begin.
Always looking around the bend.

Always thinking "what if?"
Always singing little riffs.
All about what is new.
All about the Mountain Dew.
All about swimming pools.

Never ever being cool.
Never ever failing school.
Never ever a clear mind.
Always knowing how to rhyme.
Always forgetting the good.
Always being misunderstood.

Broken,
like firewood.
5/20/2012
1.0k · Apr 2014
Bed
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
Bed
5/20/12

Head.
In Bed.
Wish I was dead.
Silent in the room.
Quiet as can be,
Yet loud as a boom.
My thoughts have no direction,
My emotions have no connection.
Creativity is ever flowing,
Nowhere will I be going.
Contradict my mind does,
As if hazed in a buzz.
Don't really know what is next,
I just try to do my best.
As I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Earth, my soul to keep.
And if I die before I wake,
I pray the Earth my soul to take.
To be fused with Great Lakes,
To be mixed but not in vain.
As if to be part of one,
To never ever be undone.
5/20/2012
885 · Apr 2014
Random
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
5/20/12

Random am I,
Random are we,
Random are those,
Random as thee.
So non-sequitur,
Never a quitter.
One with a hidden path,
Always in a bath.
Open-minded to the new,
Defenders of the few.
Mightier than the united,
Never having been divided.
Strange attractor philosophy,
Making sense with psychology.
Everyone emits a "huh?",
Intellects say a "duh,"
No one asks "What?,"
But.
"Why?"
How can it be?
That one I cannot see,
That there is so much more,
Than what's on the door.
Does it make you a number,
That judges by this cover?
Is it really what you think,
Or how much it makes you blink?
The one word that comes to mind,
The one from far behind.
Like the hungry with chewing gum,
Why are we so random?
5/20/2012
741 · Apr 2014
"Good" night
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
5/20/12

In the night,
Good or bad.
We have a saying,
For our dads,
For our moms, and our bros,
A message that we like to show.
With a kiss or with a wave,
or just how, we behave.
We like to end the day,
With something that we say.
I'm not sure when it began,
Or when it will ever end.
But in this sad light,
I still got told "good night"
5/20/2012
630 · Apr 2014
Ambers
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
10/25/12

On a bad note, things did end.
I burned a bridge, but I'd like to make amends.
Can you forgive, not forget?
'Cuz I'd like to begin again.

Clean slate, fresh plate,
Can we just erase the hate?
10/25/2012
544 · Apr 2014
9:58
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
5/20/12

Time is of the essence.
Meridian, a or p.
It doesn't matter to me.
Either way I'm in a rush,
Time is always a push.
Time for work,
Time for bed,
Time is just, in our head.
Time to spend,
You and me.
But not the time,
The time, for tea.
5/20/2012
454 · Apr 2014
Away
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
We'll be together, in my head.
Just tonight in separate beds.
Down the hall, I would lead,
To the place where we'd sleep.
Things would heat.
Lips would meet.
Clothes we'd shed.
This our bed.
Away.
1/11/13
401 · Apr 2014
One That I Released
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
11/3/11

I knew what I thought of you
It was too good to be true.
Happy moments were only few.
Our split was long overdue.

Now I look back and I see nothing.
How could we have ever been something?
Why didn't I see you were wrong?
My high expectations, short you'd fall.

-Chorus-
You were the one that I released.
The thing we had was swiftly ceased.
You were not the one that got away.
You were that left screaming.
You were the one that stole my heart.
You were a heartbreak right from the start.

In Three days our WE was formed;
In Two days we were no more.
Fast paced and short lived.
You and I, never again.
My heart, again, I'd never give.
For weeks I walked on edge,
I peaked but shortly fell,
You made my life a living hell.

Now I sit here thinking of what was,
And I sit here all because
I met the boy of dreams but not really.
My mood would never again by cheery.
Brooklyn was far away but yet so near.
I never let him shed my years.
I've moved on thanks to friends.
I'll be loved to the end.

I have found a away to fix the crack,
The one in my heart, that you did hack.
His name is new and he loves blue;
I met him during the time of boo.
11/3/2011
Kevin Hawkins Apr 2014
I'd Like To Fall In Love With You
By icha-ichaparadise (now: shizuos.tumblr.com)

i’d like to fall in love with you

(if that’s all right?)

kiss you until you fall asleep,

use my mouth to memorize

the dips and curves of the

contours of your body,

(read them like a book)

and let the syllables of my

whispers coat your frame

in a thin veil, ghosts of me

haunting you all the time

(whispering ‘i love you’)

i think i’ll fall in love with you,

(and it would be wonderful,

if you would too.)
re-post. discovered 1/24/2013

— The End —