Sometimes you want to tilt the hourglass
Slow the sands or have them flow the other way
Through the tiny gap
Only something inconceivable will fit
We get caught in the current unnoticed
And we choke on a single grain unmoving

I don't remember the first time I met you.
Only old ripped up pictures
that I may or may not be in
'cause babies all look alike after a while.

I remember the second time I met you.
Your old apartment dulled by
a haze of cigarette smoke
and your nose shone red and fat like a clown's.

I remember the third time I met you.
You sat adorned with flowers
as a man stood and sang your praises
and a woman walked plainly behind the procession.

The bird sings
He cries
He screams
The words of the great and free
Of the one.
He who took it all
And he the one who cried
"I am the one!
The one to end it all
And begin the new time
Of me."

Screams disappear into the forests
His eyes glimmer
He fights in stone
And sets in metal
The iron gaze to the right
By the disgrace of God

The people are gone
Never to tell their tales
Of this suffering
In his hands

Señores, this is all we have left
It won't buy you a loaf of bread
But it may buy him a heart
for him to feast on.

Wait
Please wait
Please don't tell me this is all there is
Every day I'm waiting for something to happen
And nothing ever does

You sit on the floor and look up
I wander
I wonder
Do I try to find a way?
Will you let me?
The ocean waves crash again
Wait
Please wait.

"MY" MANIFESTO IS AS FLOWS FOLLOWS:
SHE GOES IN THE WIND IN THE EFFERVESCENCE
OF THE NIGHT AND IN GALLANT STRIDES IT
GOES THROUGH THE WIND OF THE CITIES OF
MECHANISMS AND MINDS OF THOSE WHO
SUFFER UNJUSTLY BY THE SIGHT OF THE
MODERN. HE BRINGS THE DOG THE WATER AND
HIS DANCE LIGHTS UP A THOUSAND SHIPS, FOR
HIS HEIGHT BRINGS THE DOG THE WATER OF
THE MACHINE, AND IN THERE AND THEREIN IS
THE ONE THEY CALL LIFE AND HIS COMRADES
OF SORT AND SHAPE AND COLOUR AND SIGHT
AND SOUND. THEY CELEBRATE ALL THAT IS
UNSIGHTLY AND UNGODLY ABOUT A GOD
THERE BE, FOR IT IS ONLY IN BLOOD A MAN
SHALL PAINT THE BRIGHTEST BLUES AND THE
BLUES OF A DEEPER BROWN OF A DEEPER RED
OF A DEEPER DEEP. HE BRINGS THE TIME OF
DEED AND "GO DEEP" SHE SAYS! "GO DEEP!"

Death she is there calmly waiting her turn
A farmer's wife she rests upon the wall
Her scythe still holds a piece of wheat
Her hands worn from the day

Death she catches some sun
A mature woman she in no hurry at all

She is just there

No rush


I can live with that

and we
won't just
  survive
    but we'll
      thrive till
        we're five
           and make
              peace with
                 our hearts
                     till we're
                         feeling
                              alive
                                   and my
                                        puppy-
                                               eyed
                                                     lover
                                                            will talk
                                                                   to the
                                                                          sky and
                                                                               we'll drift
                                                                                      through the
                                                                                              night till
                                                                                                      we're free

listening to music for airports.
planes that fly in blue.
still. eternal. true.
colours made of love.
love made of colours.
child of child raised.
lowered.
elder of elder lowered.
raised.
floating. dreaming.
wanting. being.
wanting more. never having.
having more. never wanting.

There was a cloud in the sky.
I looked up and it was a heart.
It beat with the wind and took its time to grow.

You sleep in me. Silent in your dreams.
We dream together of journeys through waters and coffees and stars.
The curve of your nose is like half of a heart.

My nose isn't the right shape.

But you dream on. Oblivious and aware.
I say the words and they echo.
The vibrations fall as I do.
And you catch me. I am light enough.
To fall like a devil into the arms of an angel.

We look back down and into each other's eyes.
The cloud is no longer there.

****, OK let's do this one more time, if this goes wrong again then we'll just have to go with what we've got

Alright let's go.
I think you should bring the boom in just a bit closer. Yeah no that's too close, it's in frame - oh. Yeah that's it. OK, sound
Check
Lights.
Check
Camera, rolling.
Uh, scene 74, take 21

Action.

So kid, I uh heard you wanna be a rockstar. You know it's a tough profession, you're gonna have to deal with these thousands of people wanting to be close to you, and you're gonna have to make sure you choose the right people to come close. Oh and the talent you need to be a true rockstar, you sure you got it?

Yeah!

Atta boy.

Wandering night-time streets
Craving cigarettes and clear conscience
Running to find a way, to find you
I thought I was the only one who cared
Why am I so determined?

I picture you with a cigarette in your hand
The ashes fall to the ground we know too well
You tell me everything, then nothing
Do I deserve to know this much?
Why you went missing for a day?

An apartment with two floors
Who'd have thought?

The kitchen door is always shut
Keeping out memories that, like the smoke you
breathe, infect my mind and make me feel as
though I never do belong

Did I ever stop loving you?

I bump into you as you leave the bathroom and I
wonder if I'll ever get to touch you the way I used
to

I didn't even hold you but my shirt still smells of
cigarettes and fresh laundry; you
Why is it the nicest smell?

Sun shines blissfully through the window
On the other end of the hallway an inherent darkness
sits there.
Is it you?
Is this what you've become?
Has every last bit of hope become
lost
  faded
   dim
          gone.
You're waning.

But just like the moon you too will wax.

Will you?
Will you?
Will I?
You start laughing hysterically
Start laughing hysterically
Laughing hysterically.

Hysterically you
   fade into the darkness.

Will you return?

We
slowly
make
our
light
escape
unaware
of
each
other's
actions

­We
slowly
make
our
way
to
the
great
beyond
unaware
of
the
struggl­es
ahead

We
slowly
make
our
way
to
each
other
unaware
of
the
pai­n
inside

sometimes you just need to
stop
look around you
a stream of green turns to a stream of red
concrete dreams into reality
(the overpass grows forever greener)
AC power lines tangle into infinity
and you sit here among it all
admiring the miraculous

hmm, i don't normally laugh like
that but when i see that picture of
you it makes me chuckle in a way
that i only do when i genuinely love
something, and so far those things
only include my dog and you, you're
both dorks, maybe that's why i love
you, and then i sit on my bed  
looking through some other
pictures i have of you and i chuckle
some more because i am genuinely
in love, and then i think of those
times we just cuddled and didn't
care what the others think and i try
to imagine that but here on my
bed, my dog keeps looking at me
chuckle, he doesn't understand
feelings, his only feelings are very
happy anxious tired and concerned,
do dogs feel love like we do?

Your love hurts me. It is a love for
the unconventional story that
destroys our clichés and destroys
my heart. How can I be heartbroken

if I don’t have a heart? Take a
knife and take a life. This
conceptual artistry is no use if it
ignores and degrades another.

Trumpets and guitars flank the
avenue to your satisfaction. You
briefly travelled on mine then
stumbled back to yours when

another called you there. You’re
making me bombard myself with
question marks. You look at the
character count and think again.

It is the aftermath that is of most importance.
The moment where they take their hand and slide it up around their own breast.
Their mouth slightly agape in a moment of
Relief? Ecstasy? Guilt?
There is no word for this feeling.
And then they take their hand further up and ruffle their own hair.
Not too gently but not too roughly;
A swipe.
End to end.
They lay there in solitude.

1981

They came in like diseased eagles; mutated
forms of those they wore on their chest and
with the change once again in the weather,
the ZOMO swooped in to quell what was
‘wrong’, what would bring them down. They
run in the streets as well as the miners,
running for different reasons and different
aims. I look down, out my window and see
the army helmets littering the street like rats.
            Police.          Rats.
I could no longer see a difference. My father
went to work that morning. I clutch my doll
knowing the chance of seeing him again is
            Miniscule.   Poor.
There is no more cereal in the cupboard;
there is no more cereal in the shop; there is
no more shop. The ZOMO set it on fire when the word

                          Solidarity

appeared in the window.
“We are closing the border for the safety of the People”
            Incorrect.     Unjustified.
For the safety of You, the Elite.
“Nine killed in mine shooting”
Which side?
Only the ZOMO carry guns.
            Fascism.       Communism.
I could no longer see a difference

They took something out
of a Polski Fiat 126p.
They dragged it in
and plugged it in
while the neighbours' kids
gaped in wonder.

They went well into the night
watching Teleexpress
on the new colour TV in town.
Some kids got bored.
Went down to the playground.
Parents sat on their balconies
looking out for them.
But it was too dark.
They could not see them.
They could not see them.

Dogs scour the remains
of post-Communist streets.
I go to the shop
next to the post office.
Buy a snack.
Read a magazine.
Leave.

We go to the park.
Play some football.
Sit down on the bench.
We sing the Mazurek Dąbrowskiego
and watch the sun set
over grey apartments.