Walking through the midnight air
Thinking of the times we shared
You were sunshine I was sky
Nothing could stop us Except the time
Time of what Wonder I do
As we change so do faces, streets and time But that still won’t change The memories that I find
This picture stays to my brain
Then this way your still the same
Without sunshine You can’t see sky
Now I’m fading Since you said goodbye Without sunshine There is no more sky This is the end.
                        FAREWELL
                                            my sunshine

Father- look to the sun for the  answers my boy.
Son-why would I ask for answers from something I can only follow.
Father -because it is big and strong and can pave your road.
Son- my road is paved, paved of uncertainties and challenges which I openly accept.
Father- why would you not take the road we all chose for generations? Why must you disobey?
Son- I've seen all the damage caused by being followers, your once clean roads are now my bumpy travels. The abuse and misuse of generations have made a once easy choice almost unbearable. I chose to make my own mistakes,  on my chosen path, to learn and teach my generation and our future it is o.k. to think and live for "you". I will never condone a life in the sunshines shadow.

I never feared challenge, actually I have always accepted challenge. For it is simple to accept, challenge shows no fear. To erase “fear” from the vocabulary really makes any sentence with the word challenge in it a lot easier to over come. Fear is self made and taught passed down through generations as a tool, used for when we don’t want to, or don’t want others to do something. With out the word fear, what is a challenge? It is a simple feat given to us. A feat to help us learn so we may pass down our lessons learned, to others so they may have a smoother road in life.

Breathe in the essence of new thoughts
Exhale the ideas that were tried
Open your mind to a new path
True happiness and strength
You will find.

Sometimes
We need to climb
Back down the ladder
Once we reached the top
To avoid being burned
From our past decisions

He promised her the moon and stars,
When in reality, it was the sun she longed for.
"I can not give you the world. If I could you know I would."
Her words "I need to move away from your kindness, to find it all.
My greed persists and I refuse to change."
That was the day the sun forever would shine, due to his wishes.
Running back she kissed him, "thank you for this." He turned away and walked into the only bunker, the only protection from the sun. Locking it's door, "now it is your turn to burn."
The end.

Timmy two shoes
Was just a kid
Buried  wearing one shoe
Hung were two
Marking what they did

Holding one shoe
In their hands
Jimmy left life to soon
For different color of bands.

Eternal  love

Bullied and beaten his whole life.
His body drown,
His soul trapped under ice.
Judged by a town,
He was a only  few,  
no one told their secret,
But, they all knew.
In the creek, in the town
Under ice, they'd be found
Wooden cross, sacrifice
Belief so strong, it took their mind.
Judging all who doubted a faith
Killing in the name of
Their fathers grace.
Nightmarish screams
Echo across the lake.
In a deserted town
Who'd never admit their mistakes.

Resurfacing his demons of the past.
He climbs a thorn filled vine
To scape over the tallest of brick walls.
Nail like thorns breaking off in his palms,
With each slightest movement of hand.
Some briars even as deep as breaking through the backside of his hand.
Although the pain immense,
His grip holds tight, to achieve the top of wall.
His legs shredded, from the razor like thorns.
Pants completely  torn,
As soon will be his flesh.
They say once a king has taught his men all they can learn. To beware, beware for some men take the gift of kindness to their advantage. Once shown the strength held in numbers, if his men choose anarchy. They can defeat and overthrow. Un grateful,  un knowing, selfish beings.
Unleash the Lions!  As he run for his life. With each grasp, climbing higher each time. Bloodied, torn and exhausted. Finally he lay his beaten body on the top of the wall. His once followers, never man enough to follow his call. Cowards! He yell with his last whimper in voice. ******* go to hell,
Once given no choice.

Death isn't where we lay
Yet, is where we are born
As I lay in silence
Breaking  the silence
You heard, in your mind
One to many times
Silently our memory screams
Never to be heard,
until it is too late
Until,
the echo from all the silence
Screams so loud
that our ears bleed
Until the echo of that silence
Is heard,
Until,
it is free
Until,
it breaks the chains of silence
Until,
its soul breaks free
Until...

We do not choose our lives,
Nor can we change our lives.
-at times
We can learn to accept our lives,
Take responsibility for - our lives.
Then live our lives,
To their fullest capabilities,
For life.

Eyes meet one more time
Soulful minds alive with love
Heartbeats thump like bass

Protest peacefully
Screaming violence
Never taken serious

Wind blown clouds in sky
Tear filled rain drops feed maple trees
Leaves die feeding ground

Clouds cover sunshine
Hidden beauty awaits
Flowers deep in the ground

Night time snow blowing
Sky filled with darkened cold
Coffee warms my soul

It's late at night, he's drunk again
******* on a cigarette,  writing about where he's been.
He sits as his usual table, in the middle of the room.
An old wooden table, his mothers mothers friend bought at a flea market, times ago.
There are words and scratches covering it's every inch.
Imprinted, from his nightly thinking.
So everynight, once he dumps his overfilled ash tray and cleans the clutter of loose papers, he can see all the memories he once wrote.
Memories,  not good or bad.
Just reminders of what thought each evening in past has brought.
Half words, half sentences,  words over words.
Complete mess, just as his life.
Not even a full sentence, as are his daily thoughts.
Broken sentences written.
Broken sentences spoke.
Broken sentences - read.
Double words over one another.
Slurred speech,
Stumbles in speech.
His thoughts lost in time.
As he reads all his lines.
Telling the same story over,
Every time.
He cracks open his nightly companion, sets his reheated pizza on the table.
Putting out his smoke and scratching his head.
Guzzlers his lagar,  before he turns in.
The morning has awoke,
Hours later, he would follow.
Stumbling to his table, spilling coffee over the scattered nights work.
Looking at all the damage the night has done.
He scratches his head, as he puts out his **** on the floor.
Exhales while laughing at the papers.
"Looks like you need it more then I do today!"
He began to walk away, finding some suds with a floating ****.
Then proceeds to drink his last sip from the earlier night.
"I'm going back to bed." He says, The coffee gets me sick anyway.

Its Sunday afternoon
You wanted ice cream
But it's to hot to float
In the summers sun

You cried,  I felt  bad
And made you a slushie
You gave me a dollar
With some numbers
It made me smile
Knowing that a stranger
Would call you that night.

The hopeful of being understood
Is always wanted
Even for a glimpse, from a voice
Never before heard

Sunday evening is over
You want to be left alone
But, there is no one to let know
Instead now you think
Just because someone else has your taste
Doesn't mean they want your spoon.

It was time for my usual nightly visit to zepes for my smokes and whisky.
It was a night same as the others,
Dark, cool, and smelled of the city's sewage.
I finally get to fourth and vine, walk into Zepes and get my nightly robbing 7.25 for a pack of sticks! I ***** about it to Joe, he humors me every night, knowing the rapping still won't stop me from coming back tomorrow.
Half way home I realized,  I forgot my fith.
Lucky for me Franks place was right across the smog filled dump, I call my street.
I go in and empty out my pockets.
Throwing all my change and some bills on the counter.  "Johnny walker" I said, guess he'll be my companion on this night of oblivion.
About 8 or 10 drinks later, some ****** comes up and sits next to me.
What do you want? I said. She answered "a drink." I slid her mine, and ordered a fresh one for myself.
"You get many women, with that fantastic personality of yours?"
I replied "I hate women!"
"Why you talking to me then?" She asked.
I still want to ****, I'm not gay.
Slid my drink at her, "here!" I want a fresh one.
The night was foggy and so were my thoughts, but I remember asking her to come back to my place to ****.
It was wild, we broke everything I own and ****** like beasts all night.
I woke up looking at the ceiling "what the!" My hands still cuffed to my bed posts from the night before.
"****!" You still here? I need out these **** cuffs!
Then the bathroom door opens,  she came walking out, reaching into my pants that were on the floor.  She opened my wallet and took my last five.
"You still hate women?"
More then ever, I said.
"Good I would have hated to disappoint you."
She opened my cell, dialed 911 set the key to the cuffs on my chest
And left.
This is 911 whats your emergency?
I'm handcuffed to my bed and need to ***, please come get me!
Man I hate women!

I see everything behind you
I know all about your past
I know all you have gone through
For I am and have your back.

Early morning,
Eyes still closed.
Staggering to my local coffee shop.
Swing open the door, and yell to the girl in front of the counter.
Gimme your strongest coffee!
She gave me a strange look when I gave her five bucks and said to keep the change.
I was walking out the door.
Trying to think how much coffee is now a days.
When it hit me!
I looked back through the glass, into the store.
I saw the girl "in front" not behind the counter,  ordering a capaccino.
This answered all my well thought questions I had pondered earlier this morning.
Along with a shocking revelation.
I just paid five bucks for warm milk!

Staring in the mirror gave my soul a minute to breathe. Remembering times when I wanted to be anything but normal never wanting to grow old. As the lines in my face only deepen, so do the thoughts of a once younger man fighting to be different. Now as my age sets in a bit, I hear the thoughts of once me.
I snicker a bit, thinking "you never knew what you were thinking man."
Now I embrace these new thoughts,  thoughts of an older man. A man who has been down many roads and seen many seasons. A man who now only wants to be normal, blend in with the crowd and be listened to. I need not to be heard with my loud voice, or seen with my rebel look. I just need to be normal,  thankful when I can live normal.  Thankful for my senses allowing me permission everyday to see, hear, feel, smell, and taste life. Thankful for feeling love, through family and supportive friends. For the special connection I feel and am grateful for each day when I see my lovely wife. Grateful to be able to call my "normal" life, "my life." Grateful to learn from my past, to see my future and never to waste a single minute of life's precious minutes wishing I had anything else.

MUSIC IS MY SOULS BLOOD.

Beliefs aren't only in the hands we trust,
But more importantly, in the heart we hold.

Like a piano, alone in the woods.
Blending it self and it's beauty
Within.
The trees, tall,
So strong, yet inviting.
Their leaves, move to a whimsical tune of the breeze.
Invisible notes,
Read by an unseeing eye.
Building a Symphony,
Starring only, one night.
Footsteps on the leaf filled path,
Write a story,
like notes filling their manuscript.
The key to the forest is understanding it's story.
The keys to the piano,
Decode it's notes to the ear.
Playing it's defined Symphony
Like it's forest, for only one night.
Simply for the two are unique
Not only to the eye and to what is heard.
But also to the mind, and what is thought.
On this one night,
During the meaning,
of true, unidentified, beauty.

My rock, my soul, my everything I know.
My strength in comfort of the un-known.
My mind when my thoughts choose not to appear.
My voice of reason, that helps settle my fears.
You are my stability,  my only stability,  on this rocky road.
You keep me grounded, my angel, from harm and from falling alone.
You pick me up, to help me see the highs again in life.
Concur my fears, our fears, and help not only me, but us strengthen to carry on. Not only do I thank God for you. I thank you for being your beautiful self, for embracing my life with the strength and endless possibilities of true love and dedication.
Truly who you are, is the world to me. You fill my life with kindness and hope for each new day. You are more then my souls connection,  you are my soul. You are more then my lover, you are now the love inside me which grows. I love you more each day for truly who you are. I love you more each passing moment for truly who you show me I am. Gratefully and graciously I thank you.
Thank you, for truly who you are.

He climbs a thorn filled vine
To scape over the tallest of brick walls.
Nail like thorns breaking off in his palms,
With each slightest movement of hand.
Some briars even as deep as breaking through the backside of his hand.
Although the pain immense,
His grip holds tight, to achieve the top of wall.
His legs shredded, from the razor like thorns.
Pants completely  torn,
As soon will be his flesh.
They say once a king has taught his men all they can learn. To beware, beware for some men take the gift of kindness to their advantage. Once shown the strength held in numbers, if his men choose anarchy. They can defeat and overthrow. Un grateful,  un knowing, selfish beings.
Unleash the Lions!  As he run for his life. With each grasp, climbing higher each time. Bloodied, torn and exhausted. Finally he lay his beaten body on the top of the wall. His once followers, never man enough to follow his call. Cowards! He yell with his last whimper in voice. ******* go to hell,
Once given no choice.

Seeing your thoughts
In my mind
Ugly in words
Changing in time

Once I knew you
Thats gone now
A newer version
Bow to the endowed

Like the wind
My once knews came in life
Like the blowing wind
It all changed
Like the turn of a dime

Thought I knew, of all you are
Til wind of change
Blew us all to far

Change if life
Like the turn of a dime
The mirrors an ugly reflection
Once it stops  its shine.

Bred as a whole
Ripped apart as new
Split in diversity
Walking in distance
As two.

The elixir of life
Chased down my throat
With cheapened words
For your understanding

Chased down my throat
Like some bottom shelf burbon
I know I'll be recycling soon.

Yet-
Still I drink it
Still I say it
Knowing it's all coming back on me.
(One way or another )

I suppose in life, this is how I learn
But-
Do we ever learn?
(Don't think so my friend, just don't think so)

So I'll sit here
Drink my drink
Say my words
Saying
That we'll never learn

Cheers
to never learning again
Cheers
to never hearing your thoughts again

As I choke down these words
Chase them with spirits
Suffocate with the real hopes
Filled with lies
Of cheapened words
Just to satisfy your ego.

The script is never finished
This rewritten bogle of the once poetic mind
Is now just a lonely road
to non sensual loving words
Leading to a heart,  with nothing to show except for its deadening one way street for the broken and untrusting.
This world burns of fire, as it freezes our soul.
Stopping life in its tracks
Painting some abstract strokes
Of a now still life.
Of a life that was, once known
This battered city of the hopeful hearted has devoured every dream
And blackened all its goals
Leading the newly blind
To steal and collect there souls
Rewritten words,
claimed as new thoughts
Piles of guilt
Innocence now lost
Rewritten is this script
Taking from all its originality
Claimed by others as knowing
Known by me
As never learnt.

Now I kneel
And bow to thee
Take my head
For I need it no more

I beg of thee
Slice it clean

Let my bottled thoughts
Absorb to the ground

As they pour from my mind
Bleeding patters of time.

As my thoughts pour
Unleash my sea of dreams
Unleash my once secret,
Secrets for all to see.
(while they still can)
Until they all vanish deep
in the depths
of this trampled ground
To be buried for good.

I bow to thee,
in a guilt of plea
Take this life
(Please)
set me free.

When the blood of one's thought becomes our sand.

I am a stone.
I am the mountains stone.
With your strength,
You pick at me,
until I become to weak.
Until I can't take no more.
Losing my grip, slowly I separate,
With each hit.
Until finally, I fall,
Plumething down.
Rolling, bouncing around,
This ragged mountains terrain.
Bouncing off rocks,
Crashing to trees,
A never ending journey,
This seems to be.
Finally I land in to the rivers bed.
separated from my old,
I'll make this, my new home.
Submerged in water,
Trapped in a corner -alone
Camouflaged.
you'll never see me again,
Moss covered, green
Blending in, society.
Watching your every move.
Protecting all who you bruise.
Thinking I'm not there.
yet I live in your lungs,
For I am now your air.
I will decide,  when to leave you.
For all you have done in these woods.
Once you've realized to late,
You have killed all that's good.

Remember the script is never finished, only recreated.
Rember,
I am a stone, standing tall
I am the mountains stone.
With your strength and jealousy
You pick at me,
picking and striking
until I become to weak.
Until I cannot take anymore.
Losing my grip, slowly I separate,
A little more with each hit.
Until finally, I fall,
Plumething down
Rolling fast andbouncing around,
This ragged mountains terrain.
Bouncing off rocks,
Crashing to trees,
A never ending journey,
This seems to be.
Finally I land in to the rivers bed.
separated from my old,
I'll make this, my new home.
Submerged in water,
Trapped in a corner -alone
Camouflaged.
you'll never see me again,
Moss covered, green
Blending in, society.
Watching your every move.
Protecting all who you bruise.
Thinking I'm not there.
yet I live in your lungs,
For I am now your air.
I will decide,  when to leave you.
For all you have done in these woods.
Once you've realized to late,
You have killed all that's good.
Looking back,
At burning your own fate
Suffocating your health
trying to breathe,  too late
Your past history now,
Layed out on a shelf
Your story's been found
And you scream out , for help
Your past, may not haunt you
Yet, revenge, it will stalk you
Once karma has turned its back
At your most vulnerable of times
Is when it will attack.

The parachute won't open
I'm headed towards ground
My once white underwear
Is now a shade brown.

It was the perfect night
That night
I had thought
That night
I had bought you flowers
In the park

Seranated you a song
That had your name

I thought the feeling was right
But I saw that look, in moons light
It wasn't glistening stars
In your eyes sight
But was the darkest silouette
-of
Wind blown cloudy sky

Tear filled rain
Of broken tries instead

Silence can make the heart heavy
The darkest of night
Is the sunniest of days
When all you have worked for
Is walking away

Walk away,
Spread your wings and fly
I wish you nothing but happiness
As much as once was mine
In days of you and I

Use your love as a shield. People who cannot accept it, shy away from it. Like the burning of the suns ray. While people who accept it, also live and understand its true meaning. These are the people who  will be true friends until the end.

At the age of seventeen
Thought I seen all I can see.

Until that night came.
-everything changed.

Everything changed,
I am never again, who I was,
Then.

Everything is different,
My feelings -thoughts in different.

My soul exchanged bodies
That night, everything changed.

Every thing changed, change.
I am never again who I was then,
On that one night,
When it all had changed.
Everything changed.

My body turned cold,
In the silence of sleep.
I felt my age grow,
My eyes opened for a peek.

Out of mind, and body
Was My soul.
Being lifted from bed
As I grew old.


Everything changed that night,
My soul has gone.
Now it lives in a new home
-since that night.

Since that night
It all has changed,
Inner being,
My beliefes,
-Not my name - that night,
That night.

Paralyzed, not from fright
Held down from moving,
A strong force, a might.

Goodbye old soul,
Good luck where you belong.

Hello new life,
Now back to being strong.

I begged for you,
For change, come true.

You listened clearly,
Accepting my exchange
Of souls that night.

Everything changed That night,
I saw the light.

Heaven saw my face,
- Not this place or time
For me,
- tonight,
That night
Everything changed,
That night

Use your love as a shield. People who cannot accept it, shy away from it. Like the burning of the suns ray. While people who accept it, also live and understand its true meaning. These are the people who  will be true friends until the end.

The lake holds my faces reflection
The winds effect, ripple my face.
Giving me stress lines and aging each minute that passes bye.
Like life in a mirror, is my reflection to this lake. The wind is the artist drawing his expressions of the world's weight in forms of lines on my face. I watch sitting patiently my self growing older as I think away my thoughts, setting each new one free to the sky like a bird in time. I don't need them any more, my thoughts,  what for?
Waste away my time, thinking of simpler times. Freedom is the detached feather floating in summers sky. This feather, is a feather  for the expression of my mind.

My world has changed,
Yet my thoughts
Stayed  the same.
Evolution, revolution
-Round and round
Explain please, why did you choose me?
To live this life?
The question  - I scream
From the pain, built through the night.
Evolution,  revolution
-round and round
Disrupting  concerns,
Of your damaging behavior.
Like a prisoner, in his cell.
I'm trapped with you-
To live in your hell.
Evolution,  revolution
-round and round
Torment my nerves, strip them raw
Turn the rest of this world,
Against my every thought.
Evolution,  revolution
-round and round.

The script is never finished
This rewritten bogle of the once poetic mind
Is now just a lonely road
to non sensual loving words
Leading to a heart,  with nothing to show except for its deadening one way street for the broken and untrusting.
This world burns of fire, as it freezes our soul.
Stopping life in its tracks
Painting some abstract strokes
Of a now still life.
Of a life that was, once known
This battered city of the hopeful hearted has devoured every dream
And blackened all its goals
Leading the newly blind
To steal and collect there souls
Rewritten words,
claimed as new thoughts
Piles of guilt
Innocence now lost
Rewritten is this script
Taking from all its originality
Claimed by others as knowing
Known by me
As never learnt.

The script is never finished
This rewritten bogle of the once poetic mind
Is now just a lonely road
to non sensual loving words
Leading to a heart,  with nothing to show except for its deadening one way street for the broken and untrusting.
This world burns of fire, as it freezes our soul.
Stopping life in its tracks
Painting some abstract strokes
Of a now still life.
Of a life that was, once known
This battered city of the hopeful hearted has devoured every dream
And blackened all its goals
Leading the newly blind
To steal and collect there souls
Rewritten words,
claimed as new thoughts
Piles of guilt
Innocence now lost
Rewritten is this script
Taking from all its originality
Claimed by others as knowing
Known by me
As never learnt.

Now I kneel
And bow to thee
Take my head
For I need it no more

I beg of thee
Slice it clean

Let my bottled thoughts
Absorb to the ground

As they pour from my mind
Bleeding patters of time.

As my thoughts pour
Unleash my sea of dreams
Unleash my once secret,
Secrets for all to see.
(while they still can)
Until they all vanish deep
in the depths
of this trampled ground
To be buried for good.

I bow to thee,
in a guilt of plea
Take this life
(Please)
set me free.

When the blood of one's thought becomes our sand.

I am a stone.
I am the mountains stone.
With your strength,
You pick at me,
until I become to weak.
Until I can't take no more.
Losing my grip, slowly I separate,
With each hit.
Until finally, I fall,
Plumething down.
Rolling, bouncing around,
This ragged mountains terrain.
Bouncing off rocks,
Crashing to trees,
A never ending journey,
This seems to be.
Finally I land in to the rivers bed.
separated from my old,
I'll make this, my new home.
Submerged in water,
Trapped in a corner -alone
Camouflaged.
you'll never see me again,
Moss covered, green
Blending in, society.
Watching your every move.
Protecting all who you bruise.
Thinking I'm not there.
yet I live in your lungs,
For I am now your air.
I will decide,  when to leave you.
For all you have done in these woods.
Once you've realized to late,
You have killed all that's good.

Remember the script is never finished, only recreated.

I walk with my back towards you
In your torn town, so blue

I do not want to see your face
For then you would need to confront your fears
Fears the truth

And I your contious
I can't face you
Since you don't want to see me
I feel like nothing to someone
I once was so highly held.

You ignore me to win
Arguments so minimal
You refused one time two many
To listen

Now you lost you
By not having me
Slowly disintegrating
For setting me free

Keep me in your prayers,  please.
Not prayers of sympathy,
But prayers of hope for strength.
Lend me your ear, please.
Not to listen, but be heard.
Take your time to understand why. Why I chose you to trust in confidence.
Leave both your ears and mind open.
Let both be willing to accept my truths, not your beliefs.
Just this once listen, hear, and absorb my mind.
Feel the existence of my true presence.
-the real me.

My reality is to escape.
I escape by screaming the truth,
Screaming the truth to be heard.
Heard by closed ears,
Ears such as yours.

My dream is to be able to whisper,
Whisper those same words.
To have those same words I once whispered be heard.
To have those Whispers that I now speak.
Be heard,
Heard by you.

Little things like understanding.
once added together, can build a strength we never knew of.
Listening, before speaking.
Speaking in lyric of fact, not opinion.
All lead to a understanding.
A understanding of yourself, learning to accept truth and facts.
Learning it is o.k. to not always be right.
Learning it is o.k. to listen, absorb and give benifits of doubt, when necessary .
Let go of the angered pain,
Let go of the ego, of having to be right.
Understand, we all have the right to an open ear, from the open mind.
Theres a thought,
that enters my open mind.
Stoping the hate,
That fills my worlds time
Enter-
happiness
Stop-
in time
Understanding,
yours and mine.
Stop,
the time.
In a still second pace.
Holding time, briefly
To see, it's beautiful face.

To this thought,
That has entered my mind.
That gave me clarity,
For a still second of time.
I thank you,
my soul,
For allowing me to see,
A more loving world,
Where we all
can be.

Time does not stand still,
I know.
If it could,
this is it's second, I would choose.

My wish for this same second-
To freeze in time.
For each, and every soul
To smile, in harmony.

For everbody to feel
The warmth from happiness.
For everyone to see.
If we all work together,
A smile for one second,
We-
Can radiate a new born love.
For ourselves and each other.
All unite as one,
Where-
All are sister's and brother's.

Little Jack Horner said
To hell with this corner
And had a stroll outside

He saw his neighbor Humpty
And climbed up the wall
Not to say hi, but create a fall

Humpty said what's up guy
Horner said I'm sick of pie
Humpty saw the look in Horners eye
Oh my, oh my, please Jack I am no pie

With one push during Humptys babble
Off of the wall,
Now Jacks eggs are scrambled.

You are my everything
He whispered
As she walked away

Misty morning,  misty eyed
Rain falling from the sky
Memories fill my head
From last night, the last night
It was the darkest night
I ever have known
A tear fell for each thought I had of you
For each disbelief,
A shot of whisky, or two
You never believed in us, all this time
Never did you bring to the table of concerns, between you and I
Disbelief still lingers in my mind
Lying in the rain,
Erasing time
To think again, of what once was I
living my fantasy
Perhaps out of touch
During a time of what I thought, once was us.

Staring in the mirror gave my soul a minute to breathe. Remembering times when I wanted to be anything but normal never wanting to grow old. As the lines in my face only deepen, so do the thoughts of a once younger man fighting to be different. Now as my age sets in a bit, I hear the thoughts of once me.
I snicker a bit, thinking "you never knew what you were thinking man."
Now I embrace these new thoughts,  thoughts of an older man. A man who has been down many roads and seen many seasons. A man who now only wants to be normal, blend in with the crowd and be listened to. I need not to be heard with my loud voice, or seen with my rebel look. I just need to be normal,  thankful when I can live normal.  Thankful for my senses allowing me permission everyday to see, hear, feel, smell, and taste life. Thankful for feeling love, through family and supportive friends. For the special connection I feel and am grateful for each day when I see my lovely wife. Grateful to be able to call my "normal" life, "my life." Grateful to learn from my past, to see my future and never to waste a single minute of life's precious minutes wishing I had anything else.